Current Events > I'm so fucking done with my ungrateful, fat, useless piece of shit son

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TheFuzz3451
08/01/17 6:54:32 AM
#1:


If you don't want to read a bunch of text, just know that I've spent over 40 years of my life all for his sake, but he's thrown it away at every opportunity

So I set things up perfectly; I married the Queen of Scotland and made love to her many, many times, and she gifted me with some wonderful children. So I worked hard throughout his childhood to make sure my eldest son had everything he could want and need; education, a sufficient income, entertainment, you name it. I was even able to arrange a marriage between him and a lovely young Queen from Spain, and I looked forward to the day they both turned 16 and could consummate their marriage. He came of age first, so I figured I'd give him a county of his own as celebration. Which was a big mistake in hindsight. Right away, it was obvious that he had no practical skills to speak of, plus he was a drunkard and something of a pervert. Totally useless. But, I mean, he's going to be an Emperor one day, the young man should get some practical experience as a leader, yeah?

Well this fat fucking turd can't wait until his bride to be turns 16, so he breaks off the betrothal and marries some bimbo from Eastern Europe. I should mention that the young lady he was betrothed to grew up to be a beautiful woman who was also incredibly cunning. What a waste! Then this fucking idiot has the audacity to embrace heresy. Like, are you serious kid? You're gonna turn away from the church just to play along with some shitty cult? Well I put a stop to that one quickly, but it was just a sign of things to come.

Eventually my wife was in her 40s and she was quite awful so I figured hey, it's her time to go, let my son inherit her throne, and then when I finally pass on he'll have enough land to forge an empire. Big mistake. Sure, I was able to off her quietly, but ever since he's taken the throne of Scotland, it's just been one rebellion after another, and it's always "Father Father come save me". Bitch, be a fucking King and put these rebels down yourself dammit. But then this moron decides to have a child out of wedlock. Yeah, he couldn't even bang his dumb bimbo, he had to go screw some other damn bimbo on the side. What the fuck is wrong with this guy.

So FINALLY he has a legitimate son (just one, then his bimbo wife kicks the bucket and he never remarries cause he's a repulsive git), but he can't even get this part right. He marries him off to some Hungarian bimbo, so he inherits a random Duchy or something I dunno. Now this grandson of mine, dear god. He runs away from home, and then this dumbass starts a rebellion in Hungary where he's personally leading soldiers. And what for? Gavelkind. BITCH YOU ARE GOING TO BE A FUCKING EMPEROR ONE DAY. HAVE SOME FREAKING PERSPECTIVE. \

The dumb son even hates me now. I did him a favor and offed his bastard son so he couldn't cause any problems, but the ungrateful shit won't even talk to me now. I've spent my entire life ensuring that his future will be as glorious as possible, and all I get is scorn and hate from him. Outrageous.

But hey, his father is also a complete git, so I guess it works. Of course, I'm ridiculously talented and well rounded. I blame my son's mother. I shouldn't have killed her so soon but I'm glad I did anyway. Serves her right for giving me such an idiot son.

So now this turd is in his 40s, meanwhile I'm in my 60s and still awesome as ever, everyone loves me and I've laid down the foundations for the Empire of Britannia. I even killed off the Queen of Spain's husband so I could marry her, so that hopefully when I die, my son finally has enough sense to marry her himself like he always should have done and then he can start getting land from Spain.

I fear for my family's future.
---
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NibeIungsnarf
08/01/17 6:55:17 AM
#2:


Is he the most disappointing thing since Star Wars Episode I?
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Chicken
08/01/17 6:55:48 AM
#3:


Dad you need to calm down and get off of the computer.
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frozenshock
08/01/17 7:20:14 AM
#4:


U7EeyFD
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#5
Post #5 was unavailable or deleted.
#6
Post #6 was unavailable or deleted.
Offworlder1
08/01/17 10:58:00 AM
#7:


NibeIungsnarf posted...
Is he the most disappointing thing since Star Wars Episode VII?

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Melonfarms
08/01/17 10:58:06 AM
#8:


DuranOfForcena posted...
Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

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foreveraIone
08/01/17 10:59:05 AM
#9:


Melonfarms posted...
DuranOfForcena posted...
Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

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kingjeremy
08/01/17 10:59:15 AM
#10:


Lol
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sylverlolol
08/01/17 11:00:34 AM
#11:


Melonfarms posted...
DuranOfForcena posted...
Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

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Delta_F14
08/01/17 11:01:20 AM
#12:


foreveraIone posted...
Melonfarms posted...
DuranOfForcena posted...
Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

---
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Virus731
08/01/17 11:01:40 AM
#13:


Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

---
I hope this ****in' world ****in' burns away
And I'd kill you all if I had my way
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MakoReizei
08/01/17 11:03:29 AM
#14:


That's really funny OP because if you don't want to read a bunch of text, just know that I've spent over 40 years of my life all for his sake, but he's thrown it away at every opportunity

So I set things up perfectly; I married the Queen of Scotland and made love to her many, many times, and she gifted me with some wonderful children. So I worked hard throughout his childhood to make sure my eldest son had everything he could want and need; education, a sufficient income, entertainment, you name it. I was even able to arrange a marriage between him and a lovely young Queen from Spain, and I looked forward to the day they both turned 16 and could consummate their marriage. He came of age first, so I figured I'd give him a county of his own as celebration. Which was a big mistake in hindsight. Right away, it was obvious that he had no practical skills to speak of, plus he was a drunkard and something of a pervert. Totally useless. But, I mean, he's going to be an Emperor one day, the young man should get some practical experience as a leader, yeah?

Well this fat fucking turd can't wait until his bride to be turns 16, so he breaks off the betrothal and marries some bimbo from Eastern Europe. I should mention that the young lady he was betrothed to grew up to be a beautiful woman who was also incredibly cunning. What a waste! Then this fucking idiot has the audacity to embrace heresy. Like, are you serious kid? You're gonna turn away from the church just to play along with some shitty cult? Well I put a stop to that one quickly, but it was just a sign of things to come.

Eventually my wife was in her 40s and she was quite awful so I figured hey, it's her time to go, let my son inherit her throne, and then when I finally pass on he'll have enough land to forge an empire. Big mistake. Sure, I was able to off her quietly, but ever since he's taken the throne of Scotland, it's just been one rebellion after another, and it's always "Father Father come save me". Bitch, be a fucking King and put these rebels down yourself dammit. But then this moron decides to have a child out of wedlock. Yeah, he couldn't even bang his dumb bimbo, he had to go screw some other damn bimbo on the side. What the fuck is wrong with this guy.

So FINALLY he has a legitimate son (just one, then his bimbo wife kicks the bucket and he never remarries cause he's a repulsive git), but he can't even get this part right. He marries him off to some Hungarian bimbo, so he inherits a random Duchy or something I dunno. Now this grandson of mine, dear god. He runs away from home, and then this dumbass starts a rebellion in Hungary where he's personally leading soldiers. And what for? Gavelkind. BITCH YOU ARE GOING TO BE A FUCKING EMPEROR ONE DAY. HAVE SOME FREAKING PERSPECTIVE. \

The dumb son even hates me now. I did him a favor and offed his bastard son so he couldn't cause any problems, but the ungrateful shit won't even talk to me now. I've spent my entire life ensuring that his future will be as glorious as possible, and all I get is scorn and hate from him. Outrageous.

But hey, his father is also a complete git, so I guess it works. Of course, I'm ridiculously talented and well rounded. I blame my son's mother. I shouldn't have killed her so soon but I'm glad I did anyway. Serves her right for giving me such an idiot son.

So now this turd is in his 40s, meanwhile I'm in my 60s and still awesome as ever, everyone loves me and I've laid down the foundations for the Empire of Britannia. I even killed off the Queen of Spain's husband so I could marry her, so that hopefully when I die, my son finally has enough sense to marry her himself like he always should have done and then he can start getting land from Spain.

I fear for my family's future.
---
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Caution999
08/01/17 11:03:39 AM
#15:


A+ topic
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"Impossible is just a word to let people feel good about themselves when they quit." - Vyse, Skies of Arcadia
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refmon
08/01/17 12:01:28 PM
#16:


Virus731 posted...
Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

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If you read this signature, then that meant that I had control of what you read for 5 SECONDS!!
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AlisLandale
08/01/17 12:12:33 PM
#17:


I suddenly want to play CK2
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Kirby
08/01/17 12:13:43 PM
#18:


Conflict posted...
I'm glad you mentioned "marrying the Queen of Scotland" early so I didn't waste time reading all that garbage

---
Bender: You know, I was God once.
God: Yes, I saw. You were doing well until everyone died.
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