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Current Events > Don't have kids.

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RetuenOfDevsman
04/06/24 5:32:14 PM
#1:


I love my boys, of course.

But if I hadn't had them, I'd be none the wiser and a lot happier.

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inTaCtfuL
04/06/24 5:33:57 PM
#2:


How old are they? And why do you think you'll be happier if they were never born

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Blastia
04/06/24 5:34:10 PM
#3:


waaaay ahead of you

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#4
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Sephiroth_C_Ryu
04/06/24 5:36:15 PM
#5:


Yeah, it might be kinda mean to the kids to have them in the current situation.

https://climatereanalyzer.org/clim/sst_daily/


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super_felicia
04/06/24 5:37:26 PM
#6:


I have a reason to not have kids that being my hereditary mental illness that like every single member of my mothers immediate family has somehow which causes paranoia loopyness or bipolar. I only had concerning paranoia quite bad at one point but not the other stuff

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ItsNotA2Mer
04/06/24 5:38:47 PM
#7:


You'd be a lot happier if you never had them? What a fucked up thing to say.

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GrandConjuraton
04/06/24 5:40:10 PM
#8:


I'm unable to have kids, so it makes me frustrated when I see people like TC who obviously do not love their own.

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Kradek
04/06/24 5:43:56 PM
#9:


Don't tell me what to do.

~goes out and impregnates a prostitute~

I Am Sam

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Kai_Laguna
04/06/24 5:45:43 PM
#10:


If I hadn't had to raise my niece I probably would have drank myself to death by this point.
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lilORANG
04/06/24 5:52:35 PM
#11:


I love my kids but i'd have a lot more money and free time without them

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Damn_Underscore
04/06/24 5:55:34 PM
#12:


I love my boys of course

Id be a lot happier if I hadnt had them



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nekrodev
04/06/24 5:56:50 PM
#13:


"Don't have kids."

Correct.

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RetuenOfDevsman
04/06/24 6:16:24 PM
#14:


inTaCtfuL posted...
How old are they? And why do you think you'll be happier if they were never born
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.

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#15
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inTaCtfuL
04/06/24 6:34:19 PM
#16:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
Why do you think you're a bad father? I'm sure your boys wouldn't want to have anyone else as their father than you.

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#17
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TheSuperSilver
04/06/24 6:37:45 PM
#18:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
I'm a father of a 2 year old daughter.

Talk to us bro - I'm sure you're doing the best you can and that's all you can do. I'm also winging it at this daddy thing and trying to throw in everything good my parents did for me while leaving out the bad.

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deoxxys
04/06/24 6:37:55 PM
#19:


I used to really want a son but with today's economy forget that

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Antiyonder
04/06/24 6:39:24 PM
#20:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


This and I wish I was. But yeah better to regret not having kids than having any resentment for people who didn't even have a damn say over being born.

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Frosted_Midna
04/06/24 6:40:43 PM
#21:


Best part of being an uncle is that I still keep my money and can still be a guardian for my niece.

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Unknown5uspect
04/06/24 6:42:31 PM
#22:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
My daughter turns 10 soon and I've been here man. One thing I've learned that helps so much is to just start giving yourself credit for the little things that you do for them. It helped me have much more positive outlook on how I am as a parent.

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CervusCanadensi
04/06/24 6:43:44 PM
#23:


If I could comfortably afford a truck, boat, dirt bikes, mortgage on a house with at least 1/4 acre, yeah I'd have kids. Instead I make ends meet in a duplex with zero desire to have kids.

I wouldn't want just 1 or two, but 4 like my parents, and most of my aunts and uncles had 3-5 kids.

There is no way I can do that, even if my household income was $180,000 a year
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NoxObscuras
04/06/24 6:45:32 PM
#24:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
I feel you man, it's rough. Don't be too hard on yourself though, we're all learning as we go. Hell even our parents were just kind of winging it, even if it didn't seem that way to us as kids.

My son is 8 now and I'm still learning. But it's not all bad. It's cool watching him grow and learn as a little human, even if he's a little defiant sometimes.

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inTaCtfuL
04/06/24 6:47:52 PM
#25:


Also this topic pisses me off, people are quick to trash the TC without listening to what they had to say. Smh

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#26
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Damn_Underscore
04/06/24 6:49:16 PM
#27:


inTaCtfuL posted...
Also this topic pisses me off, people are quick to trash the TC without listening to what they had to say. Smh

He should have explained his thoughts in the first post tbh

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inTaCtfuL
04/06/24 6:52:59 PM
#28:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Get more details to see why they felt that way?

Damn_Underscore posted...
He should have explained his thoughts in the first post tbh
TC should have but who knows why they didn't, maybe it was a troll or maybe they didn't have the right head space at that moment. That's why I wanted to know more

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bsp77
04/06/24 6:53:50 PM
#29:


ItsNotA2Mer posted...
You'd be a lot happier if you never had them? What a fucked up thing to say.


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#30
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bsp77
04/06/24 6:55:00 PM
#31:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
Why do you say this? You are probably fine, but your line of thinking is going to be a problem.

I have 4 daughters btw

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#32
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RetuenOfDevsman
04/06/24 7:38:04 PM
#33:


inTaCtfuL posted...
Also this topic pisses me off, people are quick to trash the TC without listening to what they had to say. Smh
No, they're right. I'm doing a crappy job and still all I can think about is myself.

TheSuperSilver posted...
I'm a father of a 2 year old daughter.

Talk to us bro - I'm sure you're doing the best you can and that's all you can do. I'm also winging it at this daddy thing and trying to throw in everything good my parents did for me while leaving out the bad.
Problem is my best isn't good enough.

One example, a few days ago I was giving my five year old a bath, and the normal way we rinse is with a small Tupperware we reserve for this. I was trying to get the soap out of his hair, but it's getting so long and thick that it was taking a ton of reps. And every time I do it, he complains about the water getting in his eyes. So I decided to try to put his head under the faucet, but that backfired like a b and he actually got water up his nose. So he's screaming and crying--probably felt to a five year old like drowning.

Another example, a few days ago Mama made quesadillas for dinner--those being my five year old's favorite food--and I grabbed three of them to finish off the second of the four stacks, since they're cut into quarters. So we eat, and my five year old wants more because of course he does, so I get up and go to grab some. Mama says "make sure to get him one without barbecue sauce." That's a thing she does--she makes half of them with barbecue sauce. I had forgotten. Turns out, those were the last of the plain ones, and I had already eaten them all. So he's screaming and crying AGAIN because I ate his dinner, and it was even his favorite food.

And like a million other things just like that. Like, I managed to get through the day yesterday without doing something stupid, and I felt good about that, until I realized how amazingly bad of a standard "didn't screw up for three whole hours" is and than I felt even worse than I did before.

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super_felicia
04/06/24 7:42:46 PM
#34:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
No, they're right. I'm doing a crappy job and still all I can think about is myself.

Problem is my best isn't good enough.

One example, a few days ago I was giving my five year old a bath, and the normal way we rinse is with a small Tupperware we reserve for this. I was trying to get the soap out of his hair, but it's getting so long and thick that it was taking a ton of reps. And every time I do it, he complains about the water getting in his eyes. So I decided to try to put his head under the faucet, but that backfired like a b and he actually got water up his nose. So he's screaming and crying--probably felt to a five year old like drowning.

Another example, a few days ago Mama made quesadillas for dinner--those being my five year old's favorite food--and I grabbed three of them to finish off the second of the four stacks, since they're cut into quarters. So we eat, and my five year old wants more because of course he does, so I get up and go to grab some. Mama says "make sure to get him one without barbecue sauce." That's a thing she does--she makes half of them with barbecue sauce. I had forgotten. Turns out, those were the last of the plain ones, and I had already eaten them all. So he's screaming and crying AGAIN because I ate his dinner, and it was even his favorite food.

And like a million other things just like that. Like, I managed to get through the day yesterday without doing something stupid, and I felt good about that, until I realized how amazingly bad of a standard "didn't screw up for three whole hours" is and than I felt even worse than I did before.
It's amazing how aware you are on honest unintentional accidents, In my eyes your better than the unaware uncaring fathers purely from how thoughtful you're behaving, just the mindset is a recipe for improvement with extended experience you should be easy and less hard on yourself!

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#35
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#36
Post #36 was unavailable or deleted.
eggcorn
04/06/24 8:00:43 PM
#37:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
I love my boys, of course.

But if I hadn't had them, I'd be none the wiser and a lot happier.
Wow. Opposite for me. My children are everything to me.

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NoxObscuras
04/06/24 8:00:58 PM
#38:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
No, they're right. I'm doing a crappy job and still all I can think about is myself.

Problem is my best isn't good enough.

One example, a few days ago I was giving my five year old a bath, and the normal way we rinse is with a small Tupperware we reserve for this. I was trying to get the soap out of his hair, but it's getting so long and thick that it was taking a ton of reps. And every time I do it, he complains about the water getting in his eyes. So I decided to try to put his head under the faucet, but that backfired like a b and he actually got water up his nose. So he's screaming and crying--probably felt to a five year old like drowning.

Another example, a few days ago Mama made quesadillas for dinner--those being my five year old's favorite food--and I grabbed three of them to finish off the second of the four stacks, since they're cut into quarters. So we eat, and my five year old wants more because of course he does, so I get up and go to grab some. Mama says "make sure to get him one without barbecue sauce." That's a thing she does--she makes half of them with barbecue sauce. I had forgotten. Turns out, those were the last of the plain ones, and I had already eaten them all. So he's screaming and crying AGAIN because I ate his dinner, and it was even his favorite food.

And like a million other things just like that. Like, I managed to get through the day yesterday without doing something stupid, and I felt good about that, until I realized how amazingly bad of a standard "didn't screw up for three whole hours" is and than I felt even worse than I did before.
See, but the beauty of all of those little mistakes? You remember them. So now you're going to go out of your way to avoid repeating them. No one is perfect, but at least you're trying your best for your kids and are willing to accept that you made mistakes. People always tell me how great I'm doing with my son, but to me, it doesn't feel that way. You're doing just fine, but we're our own worst critics. You just have to keep that in mind sometimes and go a little easier on yourself.


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TheSuperSilver
04/06/24 8:28:51 PM
#39:


I got you dadbro:

One example, a few days ago I was giving my five year old a bath, and the normal way we rinse is with a small Tupperware we reserve for this. I was trying to get the soap out of his hair, but it's getting so long and thick that it was taking a ton of reps. And every time I do it, he complains about the water getting in his eyes. So I decided to try to put his head under the faucet, but that backfired like a b and he actually got water up his nose. So he's screaming and crying--probably felt to a five year old like drowning.

I can definitely see that happen. Whenever I give my daughter a bath, there's this plastic headpiece or partition we have where she wears it on her head that let's me (or my wife) get into her hair and wash it without any water getting into her eyes, face or anywhere else. It just falls right down her back. You can probably find something similar for your boy on Amazon or something so that problem gets solved.

Another example, a few days ago Mama made quesadillas for dinner--those being my five year old's favorite food--and I grabbed three of them to finish off the second of the four stacks, since they're cut into quarters. So we eat, and my five year old wants more because of course he does, so I get up and go to grab some. Mama says "make sure to get him one without barbecue sauce." That's a thing she does--she makes half of them with barbecue sauce. I had forgotten. Turns out, those were the last of the plain ones, and I had already eaten them all. So he's screaming and crying AGAIN because I ate his dinner, and it was even his favorite food.

That's it?? Lol don't be so hard on yourself. You weren't intentionally out there eating his favorite food so you can't get too worked up over that. Since it sounds like it's routine that the quesadillas get made on the regular just keep in mind to sequester the BBQ ones for your son.

And like a million other things just like that. Like, I managed to get through the day yesterday without doing something stupid, and I felt good about that, until I realized how amazingly bad of a standard "didn't screw up for three whole hours" is and than I felt even worse than I did before
Well you have to take your wins when you get them so always give yourself a pat on the back for a job well done. Mistakes can and will happen and what matters more is not the mistake you made but how you handle them. My 2 year old for some reason is regressing from the sleep training we gave her from 9 months on and there's this one particular plushie that she wants in her bed when she gets put down for sleep. In my efforts to get her to fall asleep quickly, I hadn't noticed that the plushie wasn't in her bed when I put her down for the night. Realizing that it was out in the living room from playing with it earlier, I waited in-between her waves of crying to quickly ninja into her room, drop it in her bed, and ninja out. She was probably on her way to sleep again without it but I didn't want her to wake up again and start crying about it if it wasn't there.

So it sounds like you've got nothing to worry about here. Just keep making adjustments as a dad and corrrect whatever mistakes you will inevitably make.

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Nirvanas_Nox
04/06/24 8:53:47 PM
#40:


I wanted some but then me and my bf realized that they most likely would grow up in a completely shitty world and I don't want that for them so we decided not to have kids and to just use our money for comfort. Cuz why the fuck not.

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Kai_Laguna
04/06/24 10:21:07 PM
#41:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
No, they're right. I'm doing a crappy job and still all I can think about is myself.

Problem is my best isn't good enough.

One example, a few days ago I was giving my five year old a bath, and the normal way we rinse is with a small Tupperware we reserve for this. I was trying to get the soap out of his hair, but it's getting so long and thick that it was taking a ton of reps. And every time I do it, he complains about the water getting in his eyes. So I decided to try to put his head under the faucet, but that backfired like a b and he actually got water up his nose. So he's screaming and crying--probably felt to a five year old like drowning.

Another example, a few days ago Mama made quesadillas for dinner--those being my five year old's favorite food--and I grabbed three of them to finish off the second of the four stacks, since they're cut into quarters. So we eat, and my five year old wants more because of course he does, so I get up and go to grab some. Mama says "make sure to get him one without barbecue sauce." That's a thing she does--she makes half of them with barbecue sauce. I had forgotten. Turns out, those were the last of the plain ones, and I had already eaten them all. So he's screaming and crying AGAIN because I ate his dinner, and it was even his favorite food.

And like a million other things just like that. Like, I managed to get through the day yesterday without doing something stupid, and I felt good about that, until I realized how amazingly bad of a standard "didn't screw up for three whole hours" is and than I felt even worse than I did before.
Bro, I was a middle school dropout, an alcoholic, and been dealing with severe depression with suicidal ideations since puberty when my sister ditched her 2 week old daughter on me. Believe me, you are doing fine as a parent.
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DarthDemented
04/06/24 10:23:29 PM
#42:


https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/forum/7/7f3d60b0.jpg

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joaquintall
04/07/24 12:09:21 AM
#43:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.

Believe me, I've been there. You're doing better than you think. And don't believe everything your kid's mother tells you, because her hormones have changed, and isn't the same person she was before the kid.

I'll argue that the kid is happy with me, and the wife will say "what does she know? She's 3."

Thanks for that vote of confidence, lady.

You're still in the picture which is more than a lot of the deadbeat dads can say. And at the end of the day, just being there is all a kid really wants.
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KogaSteelfang
04/07/24 12:43:40 AM
#44:


The fact that it bothers you to have made a few relatively minor mistakes means you care. That's the sign of a good parent. Everyone makes mistakes, no one is perfect, and you're learning as you go too.

You're going to mess up, you're going to say or do things that you wish you hadn't. But that's just life, and as long as you learn from it, it's progress. Don't beat yourself up over it.

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Cemith
04/07/24 12:47:22 AM
#45:


RetuenOfDevsman posted...
5 and 2

Mostly because I've spent the last several weeks depressed about how damn bad I am at fatherhood.
Be better at fatherhood man what the fuck.

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Garabandal
04/07/24 12:51:12 AM
#46:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvFGFEgRLTk

"I feel like I shouldn't be a full time mom because I don't love my kids."

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Evening_Dragon
04/07/24 5:04:20 AM
#47:


Lot of people without kids saying some shit

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Lonestar2000
04/07/24 5:30:02 AM
#48:


I've never wanted kids.

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rexcrk
04/07/24 6:48:39 AM
#49:


Don't have kids.

Honestly its not even an option for me so Im good lol

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IceCreamOnStero
04/07/24 7:33:23 AM
#50:


I wasn't planning to.

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