Current Events > WE HAVE A MAJOR DEPRESSIVE EPISODE (caps)

(+) Yeah! (+)

Time to pretend video games and anime can actually distract me from my miserable life.

Rewatching One Piece

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You ever get the buzzing noises, headache and lighthheadness too when you have those? When it really gets bad I start to hear the voices again

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No im not really schizophrenic. At most i get heavy anxiety that physically weighs on my chest to the point that if im laying down i have to get up and go do something to try to forget the feeling

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I'm not schizophrenic either, where'd that come from?

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Probably the voices in your head

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Oh man, for real. I've been treating my body like shit lately, eating junk food almost exclusively and playing a lot of Runescape in bed and stuff. I also began drinking really heavily at home during another bout of lockdown - puked up a bunch of chocolate honeycomb and gin one morning because it was just simmering in my gut instead of digesting.

I've decided to quit drinking, but I've gone back to this Minecraft world I began working on in April where I'm trying to flatten everything to sea level. I started it to cope with a major crisis in my life, and I tend to come back to it when I'm feeling a bit off-kilter and I need some mindless task to keep my hands busy.

If my sobriety goes the same way it did last time - sobriety making total and absolute sense 2 months in, only to be replaced with the fucking depths of human emotion that I didn't even know I could feel at the three month mark - I'm gonna need this Minecraft world on standby, and I'm gonna need regular counselling.

We're gonna get through it TC, but that doesn't diminish how hard it is now. Do whatever you can to stay on top of things.

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XxMahnaMahnaxX posted...

Time to pretend video games and anime can actually distract me from my miserable life.

Dont doubt yourself playa

semblances of culture and one of the greatest mediums of art to have ever existed? If its a distraction at least its one we dont need to pretend about

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MrMallard posted...

Oh man, for real. I've been treating my body like shit lately, eating junk food almost exclusively and playing a lot of Runescape in bed and stuff. I also began drinking really heavily at home during another bout of lockdown - puked up a bunch of chocolate honeycomb and gin one morning because it was just simmering in my gut instead of digesting.

I've decided to quit drinking, but I've gone back to this Minecraft world I began working on in April where I'm trying to flatten everything to sea level. I started it to cope with a major crisis in my life, and I tend to come back to it when I'm feeling a bit off-kilter and I need some mindless task to keep my hands busy.

If my sobriety goes the same way it did last time - sobriety making total and absolute sense 2 months in, only to be replaced with the fucking depths of human emotion that I didn't even know I could feel at the three month mark - I'm gonna need this Minecraft world on standby, and I'm gonna need regular counselling.

We're gonna get through it TC, but that doesn't diminish how hard it is now. Do whatever you can to stay on top of things.

I picked up Dragon Quest Builders 2 (basically minecraft ) during my last big depressive break. Something about the freeworld legos thing thats soothing

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XxMahnaMahnaxX posted...

I picked up Dragon Quest Builders 2 (basically minecraft ) during my last big depressive break. Something about the freeworld legos thing thats soothing

For real.

Have you got anything you're playing at the moment, or anything in the backlog that you might pick up?

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Playing Pirate Warriors 3 (one piece dynasty warriors) mostly

Had been playing Dragon Quest 11 for a while but i powered through to the 'endgame ' and took a break

For a while binging One Piece and Lupin III was keeping me sober but i relapsed tbh

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XxMahnaMahnaxX posted...

Playing Pirate Warriors 3 (one piece dynasty warriors) mostly

Had been playing Dragon Quest 11 for a while but i powered through to the 'endgame ' and took a break

For a while binging One Piece and Lupin III was keeping me sober but i relapsed tbh

Shit happens, I fell off the wagon yesterday and the night before.. Ive been clear of cigarettes and booze for a year now but apparently I went out looking for just that these past couple of nights


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No shame in relapsing, dude. What matters is that you get to a point where you try again.

Like above all else, breaking your sobriety and relapsing into alcoholic patterns doesn't destroy the progress you made the first time. It isn't like you're throwing that away, like you've just ruined your life all over again. Relapsing is a process, and ultimately people do fall back into the process of alcoholism - I sure did - but when you're in a position when you can go sober again, whenever that is, you have that first experience behind you to inform that next attempt. You also have the difference between the peak of your last sobriety and the rock bottom of your most recent alcoholic stint to inform you going forward, which is a useful tool to have. It provides contrast and (hopefully) makes the next attempt a bit easier.

That's not meant to be a call to action, like "with my support, give up alcohol and give sobriety a second chance" - that's nobody's call but your own, and you shouldn't be expected to drop everything and conform to this standard that other people are holding you to.

But I do want to say that it isn't like starting from scratch. Relapsing doesn't tarnish you, it doesn't boot you back to the bottom of the mountain. What matters is that you get better, and if you're ever in a position to try again, understand that the option is always open.

Right now probably isn't a good time to go sober, if you're having a depressive episode. But for the occasion that you may feel up to the task, I want you to know that there is hope when that day does come back around.

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Thank you all for being kind

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