Poll of the Day > pirates 3 makes no sense

(+) Yeah! (+)

when davy jones is with tia dalma when the brethren court are meeting, he asks what she will do when she is freed

and she says that she will make the brethren court see how cruel she can be, so she wants revenge on them imprisoning her, which makes sense

but all she does is create a massive storm that only helps the pirates

like that's it


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but it looks kinda cool for a bit

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Only the first movie made sense

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That's not the only thing that did not make sense in World's End. They spent the first part of that movie gathering the Brethren Court together to fight the Dutch Trading Co. But all they did was cheer after the one battle-ship was sunk by Turner and Sparrow. The movie didn't really address the issue of the battle-ships flanking Beckett's.
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they explicitly screamed that the other ships started to leave after their flagship was demolished

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Also at the very beginning of the movie when theyre in the water with those things on their heads, they look like a bunch of dickheads poking out of the water

so another plothole

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Yeah when I rewatched the pirates films it was kind of baffling how much shit they threw at you and how little logic or consistency there was to any of it

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Blightzkrieg posted...

Yeah when I rewatched the pirates films it was kind of baffling how much shit they threw at you and how little logic or consistency there was to any of it

That's what happens when you write movies based on stealing all of your ideas from Monkey Island and an amusement park ride, and then let Johnny Depp cosplay as Keith Richards for two hours.
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EclairReturns posted...

to fight the Dutch Trading Co.

Fight the what now?

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Nichtcrawler X posted...

Fight the what now?

The East India Trading Company, which seems to be inspired by the Dutch East India Company.

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Sarcasthma posted...

The East India Trading Company, which seems to be inspired by the Dutch East India Company.

The first is closer to the actual name.

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Nichtcrawler X posted...

The first is closer to the actual name.

Thank you so much.

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Let me try to remember from the top of my head.

VOC, Verenigde Oost-Indische Compagny (United East-Indian Company) and WIC, West-Indische Compagnie (West-Indian Company).

Dutch is not part of the name, it is Dutch yes, but we had/have multiple trading organizations.

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Nichtcrawler X posted...

Let me try to remember from the top of my head.

Actually, it's "off the top of my head."

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Yo @Nichtcrawler_X , I didn't get a chance to respond to you in that vaccination topic before it was deleted.

What were you saying?

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The only good thing about Pirates 2 and 3 is Bill Nighy as Davy Jones

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The captain of the Flying Dutchman can only come ashore for one day every 10 years. But what's to stop anyone from meeting him at sea?

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SKARDAVNELNATE posted...

The captain of the Flying Dutchman can only come ashore for one day every 10 years. But what's to stop anyone from meeting him at sea?

nothing, did you not get that from the fact that Davy Jones has been meeting tons of people in those films?

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Mead posted...

nothing, did you not get that from the fact that Davy Jones has been meeting tons of people in those films?

I mean after the movie ended. Did Will only see Elizabeth once every decade? Why doesn't she go to visit him more often?

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Needs more Orlando Bloom!

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SKARDAVNELNATE posted...

I mean after the movie ended. Did Will only see Elizabeth once every decade? Why doesn't she go to visit him more often?

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also he can just stand in a bucket of water and be on land

so why not just

idk

make a pool

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Ships are made of wood.
Docks are made of wood.
He's not on land if he stays on the dock.
Once he is on the dock what keeps from just walking forward?

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@OP
I think Barbossa convinced her just as she was freed that she should get her revenge on Davy Jones instead because it was actually HIS fault that she was imprisoned by the pirates.
And that's why she only created that storm and... Agh fuck it.

The movie just make no sense and I'm sure the Bayformers films makes more sense than this shit.

IIRC, the filmmakers actually admitted that they made up everything as they went along all throughout the films.
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helIy posted...

also he can just stand in a bucket of water and be on land

so why not just

idk

make a pool

pool shoes

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yes

pool shoes

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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=gv18hJ4BKkA
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SKARDAVNELNATE posted...

I mean after the movie ended. Did Will only see Elizabeth once every decade? Why doesn't she go to visit him more often?

I think the implication is that Davy Jones has all the time in the world to go wherever he wants and do whatever he wants whenever he wants because he's explicitly not doing his job (hence the curse).

If Will is doing his job and ferrying souls, he presumably doesn't have time to constantly meet Elizabeth. If he skipped a day of work he'd technically be triggering the curse as well, and then he'd wind up all fishy too.



helIy posted...

yes

pool shoes

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWNQTqMkezc
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ParanoidObsessive posted...

I think the implication is that Davy Jones has all the time in the world to go wherever he wants and do whatever he wants whenever he wants because he's explicitly not doing his job (hence the curse).

If Will is doing his job and ferrying souls, he presumably doesn't have time to constantly meet Elizabeth. If he skipped a day of work he'd technically be triggering the curse as well, and then he'd wind up all fishy too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWNQTqMkezc

I believe in Pirates 5 they contradict this by showing him start to be come fishy even though he's doing his job.

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Sarcasthma posted...

Yo @Nichtcrawler_X , I didn't get a chance to respond to you in that vaccination topic before it was deleted.

What were you saying?

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helIy posted...

when davy jones is with tia dalma when the brethren court are meeting, he asks what she will do when she is freed

and she says that she will make the brethren court see how cruel she can be, so she wants revenge on them imprisoning her, which makes sense

but all she does is create a massive storm that only helps the pirates

like that's it

@helIy

Lemme make sure I understand this.

They made a Pirates 3? they made a second sequel to the most expensive porn movie ever made?

hehehe

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How bout that Keira Knightley tho ( )

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rexcrk posted...

How bout that Keira Knightley tho ( )

Her boobs are rather small though.

I mean, she herself even admitted the production tried to stuff them up in order to give her some semblance of a cleavage.

Still a very beautiful woman, I ain't denying that.
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rexcrk posted...

How bout that Keira Knightley tho ( )

the thing I hate the most about the movie is that she randomly all of the sudden thats hating feelings for Jack Sparrow for no reason at all...and doesnt she get married to him or something? It happens out of nowhere for no fucking reason

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...no

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They didnt get married but she clearly had something going on for Jack for no reason at all

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FrozenBananas posted...

the thing I hate the most about the movie is that she randomly all of the sudden thats hating feelings for Jack Sparrow for no reason at all...and doesnt she get married to him or something? It happens out of nowhere for no fucking reason

FrozenBananas posted...

They didnt get married but she clearly had something going on for Jack for no reason at all

Is that even what they're really trying to imply there, though?

The implication seems more to be that she's pretending to have something for Jack, so she can manipulate him into doing what she wants. And then later she feels guilty about it not because it conflicts with how she feels about Will, but because she's afraid Will will be mad at her for being that callous (which is essentially exactly what happens).

If anything, I'd argue that Elizabeth's entire narrative line in the second and third movie is that she's slowly turning into a pirate, with all that entails.
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"For no reason" as every 2000s girl pines for Johnny Depp.

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ParanoidObsessive posted...

Is that even what they're really trying to imply there, though?

The implication seems more to be that she's pretending to have something for Jack, so she can manipulate him into doing what she wants. And then later she feels guilty about it not because it conflicts with how she feels about Will, but because she's afraid Will will be mad at her for being that callous (which is essentially exactly what happens).

If anything, I'd argue that Elizabeth's entire narrative line in the second and third movie is that she's slowly turning into a pirate, with all that entails.

mhm mhm

her justification is that it was the only way to escape, since the thing was after jack and no one else.

which is a bit of a plot hole, since it never went after him when he tried running from it earlier in a small boat.

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It's clearly an example of not having a full story for a trilogy in mind, so when the original Pirates became a massive hit, sequels were necessary, so they had to keep it alive.

I'd say it's less that the plot doesn't makes sense, in more that it gets bogged down by giant set pieces (that they clearly envisioned first, and then based the story around after), and too many new characters and premises to keep track of. The giant whirlpool at the end of 3 comes to mind: they used that shit in the trailers a ton, and was clearly meant to be the big finale set piece. But it's only there because Calysto gets set freed and she....makes it, because she's actually a sea diety, or something. So, this is supposed to be scary and terrible, but both fleets gleefully sail into it anyways. "Fuck it, it looks cool!" is basically what's going on there.

Ditto with Jack being kidnapped by natives on the one island in 2, or them being in China to meet Chow Yun Fat, etc. All of these makes for spectacle pieces, but absolutely did not need to exist. The plot, what with Davy Jone's curse, his heart being in the Dead Man's Chest, the East Indie Trading company blackmailing Davy to rule the ocean and exterminate pirates for corporate wealth all pretty much works, it just gets bogged down with giant set pieces and confusing time wasting moments, and cranking up the zaniness of Depp's character to where he's less menacing, and more gimmick. Compare this to the tightness and succinctness of the 1st movie, where the plot glides from point A to B in a nice, linear fashion, each scene building off the next.

Which is a shame, because they managed to turn old nautical lore into some neat ideas, like Davy, an actual Dead Man's Chest, the kraken, etc.

ParanoidObsessive posted...

The implication seems more to be that she's pretending to have something for Jack, so she can manipulate him into doing what she wants. And then later she feels guilty about it not because it conflicts with how she feels about Will, but because she's afraid Will will be mad at her for being that callous (which is essentially exactly what happens).

If anything, I'd argue that Elizabeth's entire narrative line in the second and third movie is that she's slowly turning into a pirate, with all that entails.

Indeed. Which, I also thought didn't make sense anyways (Will being mad), since Will basically went full-on pirate since at least the end of the 1st movie, and makes it pretty clear he thinks Jack is expendable in 2 & 3. So him being mad at Elizabeth joining the pirate party, and her being concerned he wouldn't like it is kinda at odds with, like, everything they do.

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CyborgSage00x0 posted...

Which, I also thought didn't make sense anyways (Will being mad), since Will basically went full-on pirate since at least the end of the 1st movie, and makes it pretty clear he thinks Jack is expendable in 2 & 3. So him being mad at Elizabeth joining the pirate party, and her being concerned he wouldn't like it is kinda at odds with, like, everything they do.

Ehh, I can see it from two points of view.

First, it's entirely possible for someone to be morally flexible yet still be pissed at someone else for being the same, especially if you expect better of them. On some level, Will has always idolized Elizabeth and put her on a pedestal, so getting his nose rubbed into the fact that she can be just as low and base as the rest of them could easily sting a bit. It's the moment when he realizes the image of her he loves has feet of clay, as it were.

Second, Will is still very much a good man. He's about the least pirate-y main character (his motives in the first movie revolve almost entirely around Elizabeth and his motives in the sequels revolve almost entirely around saving his dad). What few pirate traits he does have are mostly surface at best, and he still tends to try and do right by people unless they've done wrong by him (even most of his attempts to screw over Jack are in situations where Jack brought it on himself and kind of shouldn't have been interfering in the first place). If anything, Will's a contrast with most of the actual villains of the sequels, who are clearly very bad men who hide their evil behind the veneer of being civilized and respectable.

(In a sense, Jack fits that mold as well, albeit less well - for all that he talks a good game and is constantly willing to scheme or betray to his own advantage, he does still do the right thing in the end to save Will. Part of why Jack gets to be one of the good guys and not just another villain is because he does clearly have some degree of loyalty and honor, even if it's pretty tarnished, and incredibly flexible.)

So it's not really a stretch to see Will as being annoyed because on some level he feels guilty that they betrayed Jack, mad at Elizabeth for being willing to make that choice, and mad at her on top of that for lying to him about it. Not enough for him to be like "We're done forever! I never want to see you again!", but enough for him to be a bit pissy with her about it for a while.
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Metalsonic66 posted...

Only the first movie made sense

CyborgSage00x0 posted...

but both fleets gleefully sail into it anyways. "Fuck it, it looks cool!" is basically what's going on there.

davy jones had no reason to be scared of a maelstrom, since, y'know, his boat is a submarine and his crew are fish people

barbossa, on the other hand, is just nuts

barbossa is also the best character in the series

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