Current Events > I just found out my girlfriend cant have kids.

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CarrieChan
07/09/21 3:39:47 AM
#154:


How long until gunplagirl uses TC's infertile girlfriend to score political points? She already used someone's dead girlfriend to win an argument and refused to apologize for it so I can see it happening in the future. I forget who it was though. Does anyone remember?
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Middle hope
07/09/21 3:41:24 AM
#155:


CarrieChan posted...
How long until gunplagirl uses TC's infertile girlfriend to score political points? She already used someone's dead girlfriend to win an argument and refused to apologize for it so I can see it happening in the future. I forget who it was though. Does anyone remember?
Pepperidge Farm remembers

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ThePrinceFish
07/09/21 3:50:15 AM
#156:


I'm not sure what's worse between the "dude now you can have sex with no worries man what's the issue bro?" people or negi's trolling about trans shit for no reason.

Either way, yeesh.

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#157
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#158
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Drpooplol
07/09/21 9:45:50 AM
#159:


Conflict posted...
This is the second time you've defended gunplagirl on callous behavior when you really don't need to. Again, we literally had people in this topic insulting TC's GF and calling her "damaged", do you not really see how airheaded it is to come in here and talk about how jealous you are of the treatment she's getting for being cis?

There's a certain point when you're not actually spreading awareness about something, but rather making a shitty and traumatizing situation someone else is experiencing about yourself when it just isn't warranted
This is a very well put post

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gunplagirl
07/09/21 10:07:18 AM
#160:


Conflict posted...
Reeeee
Is it just a coincidence I only see you make these sorts of posts directed at women, or?

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sabrestorm
07/09/21 10:10:15 AM
#161:


Adopt
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#162
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asagi_mode_gone
07/09/21 10:28:12 AM
#163:


Conflict posted...
Is it a coincidence that the two posts I've made addressing someone being a callous idiot (that just happened to be about a woman) were directed towards you? I don't think so

But if you want to think I'm misogynistic because I think it's stupid as fuck for you to bring up the death of someone's GF to make a point and for you to try and make the trauma a cis woman is experiencing about yourself, then you can try that card. I don't think that's gonna work out well for you tho
>trans woman who can't have kids makes post in topic about not being able to have kids, is called heartless
>cis woman (cleo) posts about how she had kids, is praised for being so gentle and caring

The one with a problem here is you.
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IfGodCouldDie
07/09/21 10:35:04 AM
#164:


gunplagirl posted...
Is it just a coincidence I only see you make these sorts of posts directed at women, or?
Yes. I've seen Conflict call out almost everyone.

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#165
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asagi_mode_gone
07/09/21 10:43:46 AM
#166:


Conflict posted...
Cleo literally related her situation to TC's and actually gave suggestions because she couldn't conceive on her own. She's actually trying to give TC hope.

The first thing you said was "the difference between how a cis woman is treated and how I'm treated is disgusting", when there were literally people in this topic reducing a woman's worth to whether or not she could conceive.

I like that you're outspoken about the bad experiences transgender people go through, but you're doing it in the absolute worst way possible.
Then please tell me, all knowing cis man, what's the right way to relate to another woman who is infertile? I said how dehumanizing others are towards us, but that sympathy levels still ultimately differ. That's relating with respect to my own personal experiences.

Cleo still ultimately talked about how she spent tons of time and money (things most people don't have) to get pregnant, and how her friends also had issues but have had kids. That's still bragging about the opportunities she's had, when that's very likely not even possible in the case of TC's girlfriend.

It's not a matter of relating, it's that you personally have issues with me for my being trans, and that's why you find it offensive that I can sympathize with what the girlfriend has been going through. Because by your own word, you don't think it's sympathizing at all.
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Slayer_22
07/09/21 10:53:00 AM
#167:


asagi_mode_gone posted...

>trans woman who can't have kids makes post in topic about not being able to have kids, is called heartless
>cis woman (cleo) posts about how she had kids, is praised for being so gentle and caring

The one with a problem here is you.

Correction:

>trans woman who can't have kids makes a post saying that she can't have kids in a topic that has nothing to do with the topic to bring attention to herself, calls the TC immature based on nothing, then spends the entire topic arguing with the person going through trauma who tells her to go away without actually providing help. Then after she is warned, proceeds to keep whining on an alt.

>cis woman tries to relate to the TC without making the whole situation about an unrelated topic

Inb4 calling me a bigot
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scamatoru
07/09/21 10:53:04 AM
#168:


asagi_mode_gone posted...
Then please tell me, all knowing cis man
dude who the fuck talks like that


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nothing to see here
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#169
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#170
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Giant_Aspirin
07/09/21 10:58:34 AM
#171:


gunplagirl posted...
Put it all on yourself for insecurities.

what in the actual fuck

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Giant_Aspirin
07/09/21 11:04:18 AM
#172:


asagi_mode_gone posted...
>trans woman who can't have kids makes post in topic about not being able to have kids, is called heartless
>cis woman (cleo) posts about how she had kids, is praised for being so gentle and caring

The one with a problem here is you.

you got called heartless because you turned it into a topic complaining about how unfair life is for you. basically saying "Yeah thats nice and all but do you have any idea how hard things are FOR ME?"

Cleo responded in a compassionate way and offered suggestions, as others have pointed out, instead of making it all about her, which is what you did. you often respond to cis people's problems with bullshit like this and say things like "oh boo fucking hoo you cis people, do you have any idea how much harder things are for us trans folk? you have no right to complain about any of this when i have it worse". im not saying you're doing exactly that here, but this reductionist attitude you have towards non-trans problems is something i see often and it's pretty gross.

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#174
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Akagami_Shanks
07/09/21 11:11:27 AM
#175:


OffTempo posted...
Some people out of pocket in this topic. Someone finna get warned.
prophet

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yes
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Flauros
07/09/21 11:12:32 AM
#176:


asagi_mode_gone posted...
Hey so can you guys please stop posting disruptive shit that's completely unrelated to the TC having a girlfriend who can't have kids? We need to be thoughtful of the two of them, and making it about gunplagirl is just making matters worse.

I hope the girlfriend is okay.
This is just dripping with sincerity...

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Giant_Aspirin
07/09/21 11:13:09 AM
#177:


Conflict posted...
Why not?

That's exactly what she's doing.

just a little disclaimer so she couldnt deflect and argue "but im not doing _exactly_ that".

edit: i also assumed asagi_mode_gone is gunpla

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Slayer_22
07/09/21 11:25:39 AM
#178:


Giant_Aspirin posted...


just a little disclaimer so she couldnt deflect and argue "but im not doing _exactly_ that".

edit: i also assumed asagi_mode_gone is gunpla

It is gunpla.
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Notti
07/09/21 11:27:46 AM
#179:


RemixRBG posted...
Or even look into multiple wives


... wut
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#181
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bsp77
07/09/21 11:42:07 AM
#182:


DDirtyDastard posted...
No more contraception for you bro. My gf can't have kids either. It's awesome, you'll love it. Raw dog all the time, no need to pull out.
What is wrong with you? Why don't people have empathy?

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Slayer_22
07/09/21 11:42:58 AM
#183:


bsp77 posted...

What is wrong with you? Why don't people have empathy?

A quick glance through this topic, and the answer is a resounding no.
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#184
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bsp77
07/09/21 11:53:05 AM
#185:


Conflict posted...
Oh wow that was a quick warning
Lol

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TetsuoS2
07/09/21 11:56:46 AM
#186:


I hope you guys find a way to deal.

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MushroomMuncher
07/09/21 11:58:43 AM
#187:


I don't get why people are shitting on OP for wanting kids that are his own flesh and blood and not adopting.
I get his point of view really. Adoption is its own can of worms to open, and depending where you live it can be pricey and time consuming. For me personally, there will always be that itching thought in the back of my mind their biological parents might want to re-enter the picture at some point in the future and cause problems (I mean, if they're not dead that is)

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Zodd3224
07/09/21 12:12:56 PM
#188:


MushroomMuncher posted...
I don't get why people are shitting on OP for wanting kids that are his own flesh and blood and not adopting.
I get his point of view really. Adoption is its own can of worms to open, and depending where you live it can be pricey and time consuming. For me personally, there will always be that itching thought in the back of my mind their biological parents might want to re-enter the picture at some point in the future and cause problems (I mean, if they're not dead that is)

Welcome to GFAQs

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I4NRulez
07/09/21 1:05:47 PM
#189:


Oof, it got a little heated in here lol

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Cleo_II
07/09/21 1:52:06 PM
#190:


Not sure why Ive been brought up. I thought it was pretty obvious that Im sharing that there are other options and I empathize with the situation. Seems most can see that. Not the first time gunpla has come at me though. Infertility is a heavy topic and its devastating for anyone to go through regardless of gender, sexual orientation, etc. I dont believe in participating in pain olympics.

I4NRulez posted...
It really hit us both like bricks. We knew she had the cyst but they kinda made it seem like no big deal. They said its most likely PCOS which would make it harder to conceive but not impossible. Today she got the news that when they go to remove the cyst because of how large they found out it was. If they see its cancerous they are just going to take all of it out.

Its been a very emotionally charged day. I'm kinda lost on where to go from here. I know options but every thing is so pricey and we arent rich.
I suggest taking a look at infertility sub reddits if you ever need support. I lurked a few of them. Also dont know what your gf does for a living but some companies cover infertility treatment. I know starbucks does. I think Amazon does too. My treatment was covered by insurance. And if youre in Canada or the UK, then its free. Some people opt to travel abroad to save on costs. There are options out there. The initial news is a shock though. What youre both going through is grief and completely normal. For now, its hard to think of next steps until you know the outcome of the surgery so just try and be there for her as best you can, which it sounds like you have been.
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CarrieChan
07/09/21 2:38:32 PM
#191:


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#192
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bsp77
07/09/21 2:43:29 PM
#193:


Cleo_II posted...
Not sure why Ive been brought up. I thought it was pretty obvious that Im sharing that there are other options and I empathize with the situation. Seems most can see that. Not the first time gunpla has come at me though. Infertility is a heavy topic and its devastating for anyone to go through regardless of gender, sexual orientation, etc. I dont believe in participating in pain olympics.
Don't worry about it Cleo, the vast majority of us here like you and don't like her. She is a bully.


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WashYourHands
07/09/21 3:21:48 PM
#194:


CalypsoDoom posted...
If people don't want responses to their topics they shouldn't post. I mean she was just making a point about how shitty people are to trans women, which is undoubtedly true.
Is it that hard to find internet friends that you have to latch onto and defend some of the worse people here?

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SilvosForever
07/09/21 3:24:12 PM
#195:


There are options TC. Artificial insemination with a surrogate mother (if you want the kid to be the both of yours, genetically). OR adoption, if you just want a kid.

It's not a problem worth separating over.

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WARED
07/09/21 3:55:29 PM
#196:


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#197
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Lokison
07/09/21 4:23:24 PM
#198:


This was one hell of a topic, I'll say that much.

TC, you've already been given the best advice CE can offer you, so I wont offer anymore; but I genuinely hope everything goes well for the both of you.

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ShyOx
07/09/21 4:24:13 PM
#199:


If she has eggs you can always get a surrogate if you're rich. Costs about 10k on top of the normal costs.

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gamestunner
07/09/21 4:30:06 PM
#200:


That's sucks, my bro and his wife keep having miscarriages.
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CapnMuffin
07/09/21 5:02:43 PM
#201:


Hey TC. Not really advice, just sharing my thoughts and experience. Maybe a takeaway in here!

My wife had problems with fertility as well. Similar issue with cysts/PCOS. We had many discussions about it and talked about our goals and what back up plans we would feel good with. Unfortunately theres a cost with most options too so we made sure to consider budget in our discussions.

Ultimately we tried the IVF route with a top of the line clinic. The process was very difficult, especially on her. In the end it was successful and we were very lucky all things considered. We lost an embryo at one point but it was pretty early in the pregnancy so not too traumatic. If things didnt work out we were prepared to adopt instead.

At one point there was a major health concern. But again we were fortunate and walked away unscathed. Open communication and support got us through together.

Let me know if you have any questions.
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Bass_X0
07/09/21 6:00:52 PM
#202:


Yeesh. Things went crazy in here.

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Back_Stabbath
07/09/21 7:52:12 PM
#203:


thank fuck the mods did something correct in here.

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CarrieChan
07/10/21 1:54:42 PM
#204:


Back_Stabbath posted...
thank fuck the mods did something correct in here.
It was an amazing bloodbath.
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I4NRulez
07/10/21 4:44:34 PM
#205:


A quick update. They did a blood test for cancer markers and everything is coming back normal so thats a good sign at least.

They wont know for sure until she has the surgery though but its definitely a good sign. My girlfriend is a little more relieved now.

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