Board 8 > Are you close with your father?

(+) Yeah! (+)

it's father's day

It's not like I talk to him every day, but I am taking him to see Fast 9 next weekend

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Mine bailed almost 30 years ago so not at all

I completely cut him from my life a couple years back. One of the best decisions of my life, and I'm happy my sister finally made the same decision a month back.

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swordz9 posted...

Mine bailed almost 30 years ago so not at all

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Used to not be as much, but then my mom passed away some years ago and that kind of changed our relationship and he chilled out a bit so we became closer

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nah. left when i was two. tried to reconnect in my twenties but wasn't willing to offer any sort of financial help so I told him to fuck off and die. Don't know if he has or not and don't particularly care


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He passed away 16 years ago but we were very close

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He died when I was 15, and before that we were moderately close but my parents were divorced so I only really saw him every other weekend

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I am

Yeah pretty close.

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ExThaNemesis posted...

tried to reconnect in my twenties but wasn't willing to offer any sort of financial help so I told him to f*** off and die.

You tried to reconnect by asking him for money? Lmao

My dad and I just have nothing in common or anything, nothing for us to enjoy together so we've always been kinda distant.

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He was awful during my childhood, but we get along alright now.

No, he's in another state
But I guess, close enough. We were close when I was younger and I'm no longer at odds with him.

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ChainLTTP posted...

You tried to reconnect by asking him for money? Lmao

I never asked for money? We went out to lunch a few times where I was explaining my upcoming study abroad things and he never offered a red cent to help me out after 20+ years of nothing so I quit offering more of my time lol

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I talk to him on like Christmas, Father's Day, and birthdays. We are about to get a lot closer or end it altogether, I think.

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And further, what is wrong with me asking for money from someone that basically abandoned their son?

It wasn't that I needed it, it was that it would have shown some level of investment beyond him being able to feel good about reconnecting with me.

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I mean if you felt like he owed you money you should've just said so instead of assuming he also felt like he owed it to you

He might have felt awkward offering to give you money when he wasn't part of your life or something. Just because he didn't just offer doesn't mean he wasn't necessarily willing.

But maybe he wasn't and didn't really care that much. I don't know. It's just a strange way to go about it.

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Best man I've ever known. I'm very fortunate to have great parents.

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Anyway, yeah, we were close (pretty much all of my sports fandom came from him), but he died in 2017.

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It's been a little over 13 years since he went into the ground, but the house I bought is a short walk to the cemetery so we're pretty close, yeah

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Leonhart4 posted...

I mean if you felt like he owed you money you should've just said so instead of assuming he also felt like he owed it to you

He might have felt awkward offering to give you money when he wasn't part of your life or something. Just because he didn't just offer doesn't mean he wasn't necessarily willing.

But maybe he wasn't and didn't really care that much. I don't know. It's just a strange way to go about it.

I don't know. I obviously am and was quite bitter and maybe he sensed that.

I didn't actually say to him "fuck off and die" but that was my sentiment when I stopped responding to his emails

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Well, my wife's father has been very distant and has used gifts and money in an attempt to fill the void of his absence, and it hasn't made her feel any better about the fact that he hasn't been there. It might have been better for you just to make a clean break and get out. Sometimes my wife wishes she could.

Although he did call her on her birthday this year for the first time in many years, so maybe something might change, although she isn't getting her hopes up yet.

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Im OK with my dad. I will never be on the same page as him and he could have been better to me growing up but it is what it is.
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Haven't talked to him in a couple years now. I didn't even realize, but we never were close. A part of me does feel bad since he's a very lonely man, but I think he sort of made his own bed by the way he treated me and the rest of the family.

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I love my dad, hes a great guy, but the way we are is that since Ive moved away, Im terrible at keeping touch.

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His bedroom is on the floor below mine, so pretty close yeah.

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Always hated the guy and the day he killed himself was the greatest day of my life, I often fantasized about killing him myself
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Mine walked out on us a couple times and for a long time he had a special dislike of me in particular. He's calmed down a bit now, but I'm still not in a hurry to give him a card or anything.

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Seginustemple posted...

Always hated the guy and the day he killed himself was the greatest day of my life, I often fantasized about killing him myself

Goddamn I thought my bit was gonna be the most metal.

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My dad is an asshole and I'm literally waiting for him to one day die so i can have some of the money he has stashed away.

ExThaNemesis posted...

I don't know. I obviously am and was quite bitter and maybe he sensed that.

I didn't actually say to him "fuck off and die" but that was my sentiment when I stopped responding to his emails

Sorry your post made it seem like you went up to him and said "give me money plz" and then when he said no, you told him to die lol.

ChainLTTP posted...

Sorry your post made it seem like you went up to him and said "give me money plz" and then when he said no, you told him to die lol.

lol it prolly would've saved me time!

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Yes. He can still be controlling but has always cared greatly for my siblings and me, always offered support, always kept the door open. Overall I'm lucky to have a dad like him.

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Yeah, we're cool. Was terrified of him when I was a child, he was a Marine and beat the shit out of me. We talk shit to each other so everything is cool now.

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Only when he takes too many meds and passes out in my bed.

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Not especially?

Though things have gotten better over the years.

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Eh used to be but now all he does is talk about Q anon conspiracies and trump and I just cant listen to it anymore

also the fact he thinks COVID is a lie and I have a small kid Id rather not have catch it

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i've never met him so