Board 8 > Mer Ranks 110 Pokemon With Writeups + Comics [pkmn] [mer] [yeah]

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Page List: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 9
Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 10:51:00 AM
#1:


Hello, and welcome to the greatest ****ing pokemon ranking list you'll ever see.

You guys nominated, and here is the final list of pokemon I'll be ranking:

Absol
Aipom
Alomomola
Arcanine
Articuno
Bellossom
Bonsly
Braviary
Bronzong
Buizel
Cacturne
Cofagrigus
Conkeldurr
Delibird
Dewott
Ditto
Donphan
Dragonite
Dugtrio
Durant
Dwebble
Electivire
Electrike
Emolga
Escavalier
Exeggutor
Feraligatr
Ferrothorn
Froslass
Gabite
Gallade
Galvantula
Garbodor
Gardevoir
Genesect
Girafarig
Gligar
Gloom
Golurk
Grumpig
Haunter
Haxorus
Honchkrow
Hydreigon
Jolteon
Joltik
Jynx
Kecleon
Keldeo
Kingler
Klink
Lanturn
Lilligant
Ludicolo
Lumineon
Luvdisc
Luxray
Magikarp
Magmortar
Manectric
Marill
Marowak
Marshtomp
Masquerain
Medicham
Meloetta
Mew
Miltank
Minccino
Mismagius
Nidoqueen
Octillery
Omastar
Palpitoad
Parasect
Persian
Pichu
Pikachu
Poliwrath
Porygon-Z
Porygon2
Purugly
Quagsire
Raichu
Regirock
Rufflet
Sandshrew
Serperior
Skitty
Slaking
Snivy
Snorlax
Spoink
Squirtle
Steelix
Stunfisk
Suicune
Swampert
Tropius
Tympole
Umbreon
Ursaring
Volcarona
Virizion
Wailmer
Xatu
Yamask
Zangoose
Zebstrika
Zigzagoon

A beautiful list if I've ever seen one.

Also, Giggs may be ranking the same 110 pokemon. Who knows.

Without further ado, let's get this underway.

First writeups coming soon.

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GenesisSaga
03/26/11 10:52:00 AM
#2:


Taggin' this b****.

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Silver_Ermine
03/26/11 10:57:00 AM
#3:


YAY :D

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:05:00 AM
#4:


110. Luvdisc

Luvdisc being at the bottom of this list should come as a surprise to absolutely no one. Seriously, look at it. It's so ****ing stupid. It's a heart shaped fish. That is it. It doesn't evolve into something cool, it doesn't have an interesting ability, or concept, or a cool type combo. It isn't a bro, or cute, or badass looking. It sucks. It's also completely useless in terms of gameplay, and I'm not even a metagame douche. In a generation that was already overpopulated by water types, they literally decided it'd be a good idea to waste a slot on this piece of ****.

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"Augh".

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GenesisSaga
03/26/11 11:07:00 AM
#5:


YES! Off to the greatest start again. :P

No luv for Luvdisc. As it should be.

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:32:00 AM
#6:


109. Exeggutor

I'm just gonna start this off by saying that Gen I is overrated as ****. I don't care if thinking about older pokemon gives you warm and fuzzy memories of being ten years old. Anyone objectively looking at each generation's batch of monsters can recognize that for every Luvdisc the newer generations shart out, there's an equally stupid pokemon from Gen I to go with it. It just so happens that the older ones get protected from the hate by blind fan nostalgia. ****ing look at Exeggutor. Look at it. It makes absolutely no sense. It used to be a pile of 6 pissed off eggs, which was already stupid. But then in evolved into a ****ing palm tree of stoned coconuts, except they're still called eggs. Seriously, the creators were definitely high when they thought this **** up. I'm just stunned that they never realized what a stupid idea it was after they sobered up. Exeggutor is a ****ing loser. These three coconeggs probably sit around all day smoking weed and talking about how awesome the party this weekend was. They remind me of all the kids that dropped out of my high school.

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RidiculousSwag
03/26/11 11:36:00 AM
#7:


articuno #1

exeggutor that low :(

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rammtay
03/26/11 11:36:00 AM
#8:


mer

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bospsychopaat
03/26/11 11:38:00 AM
#9:


tag

*sees Exeggutor*

ow :(

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Rusry
03/26/11 11:39:00 AM
#10:


(11:34:40 AM) RustyMrMokka: the way you explained it mer
(11:34:49 AM) RustyMrMokka: Exeggutor is awesome
(11:35:03 AM) RustyMrMokka: plus it's in the name ex-egg so he's not longer an egg
(11:35:19 AM) Mershiness: how about you comment in my damn topic so it can get more posts and I look like less of a loser
(11:35:57 AM) RustyMrMokka: yeah putting exeggutor low is what losers who can't hold their liquor do
(11:36:04 AM) RustyMrMokka: and get drunk off one beer
(11:36:09 AM) kbartz87: XD
(11:36:15 AM) RustyMrMokka: which is a lite beer

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:39:00 AM
#11:


^ examples of fans blinded by gen 1 nostalgia

suck it haters

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:39:00 AM
#12:


From: Rusry | #010
(11:34:40 AM) RustyMrMokka: the way you explained it mer
(11:34:49 AM) RustyMrMokka: Exeggutor is awesome
(11:35:03 AM) RustyMrMokka: plus it's in the name ex-egg so he's not longer an egg
(11:35:19 AM) Mershiness: how about you comment in my damn topic so it can get more posts and I look like less of a loser
(11:35:57 AM) RustyMrMokka: yeah putting exeggutor low is what losers who can't hold their liquor do
(11:36:04 AM) RustyMrMokka: and get drunk off one beer
(11:36:09 AM) kbartz87: XD
(11:36:15 AM) RustyMrMokka: which is a lite beer


yessss <3

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WazzupGenius00
03/26/11 11:39:00 AM
#13:


tagalicious

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:40:00 AM
#14:


also now I look like MORE of a loser because it's public information that I ASKED YOU TO POST

thanks a LOT Rusty

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Rusry
03/26/11 11:42:00 AM
#15:


anytime babe <3

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:50:00 AM
#16:


108. Klink

Like I said, every generation has some ****ty pokemon. 5 Is no exception. Klink is a ****ing gear. Well, actually it's two gears, but a single gear by itself is pretty much completely useless. Were they just trying to think of more real-life objects they hadn't made into pokemon yet? What the hell. Was anyone asking for this? Does anyone actually use Klink? I mean, I like its eyes and its facial expression(s). I guess it's actually kind of cute, you know, for a ****ing gear pokemon. Like I said, I don't like pokemon that have multiple heads, usually. They just come off as desperate losers who can't make friends so they just grow extra heads to be friends with. I really don't know why the hell Nintendo would even come up with this. Maybe it's some sort of pretentious social commentary.

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blindhobo13
03/26/11 11:51:00 AM
#17:


ugh Klink over Exeggutor

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Silver_Ermine
03/26/11 11:52:00 AM
#18:


Agree with everything so far :)

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GenesisSaga
03/26/11 11:54:00 AM
#19:


Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer posted...
109. Exeggutor

I'm just gonna start this off by saying that Gen I is overrated as ****. I don't care if thinking about older pokemon gives you warm and fuzzy memories of being ten years old. Anyone objectively looking at each generation's batch of monsters can recognize that for every Luvdisc the newer generations shart out, there's an equally stupid pokemon from Gen I to go with it. It just so happens that the older ones get protected from the hate by blind fan nostalgia. ****ing look at Exeggutor. Look at it. It makes absolutely no sense. It used to be a pile of 6 pissed off eggs, which was already stupid. But then in evolved into a ****ing palm tree of stoned coconuts, except they're still called eggs. Seriously, the creators were definitely high when they thought this **** up. I'm just stunned that they never realized what a stupid idea it was after they sobered up. Exeggutor is a ****ing loser. These three coconeggs probably sit around all day smoking weed and talking about how awesome the party this weekend was. They remind me of all the kids that dropped out of my high school.

external image


O_o

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http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/8-gamefaqs-contests/58424268/649092886

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 11:54:00 AM
#20:


GenesisSaga

good user

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GenesisSaga
03/26/11 11:57:00 AM
#21:


Mershiness

great user

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swordz9
03/26/11 12:02:00 PM
#22:


Great list so far.

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mnkboy907
03/26/11 12:04:00 PM
#23:


My two nominations not in the bottom 3 = yay.

For reference, though, had I nominated Glalie, would it have been very, very low? It got 100th and 96th in the other two topics. >_>

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 12:06:00 PM
#24:


Glalie's like... eh. Something as cute as Snorunt evolving into a pissed off hockey mask doesn't really make sense, but he's kind of cool. I dunno. He'd probably be like 70s-80s here.

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mnkboy907
03/26/11 12:16:00 PM
#25:


I'll take it.

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LiselTestify
03/26/11 12:23:00 PM
#26:


oh god these are so hilarious i pissed all over the place

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 12:25:00 PM
#27:


I love you Lisel

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 12:48:00 PM
#28:


107. Conkeldurr

Overrated to hell and back. I don't care how useful he is in battle. I don't. Save it for your metagame douchebuddies. Conkeldurr is ugly as ****. Its name literally has "durr" in it. When it comes to pokemon, I really don't care much about your stats or how useful you are in battle. I care about whether or you are a friend. All my favorite pokemon are ****ing buddies. They're bros. They're friends. This guy? I'm sorry, I could never be friends with something that ugly. He's literally repulsive to look at. Timburr was alright, he was at least a bit cute. But this line just gets worse as it evolves. The veins popping out all over its body are nauseating, his face is stupid as hell looking, and he's permanently holding two stone pillars for no reason. Also, it should be mentioned again, his name has ****ing "durr" in it. Just bad decisions all around during the creative process here. Fighting pokemon are usually cool looking, but they really ****ed things up with this guy. He could've been awesome. But he's just gross.

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 1:31:00 PM
#29:


106. Cofagrigus

This pokemon is horrendous for a number of reasons. First of all, the idea of a sarcophagus pokemon is kind of stupid. I mean, I suppose there could be a way for it to be pulled off well, but this guy... is not it. For one thing, its name contains a word that is offensive to my community. Nice going there, Nintendo. It's lovely to know that you'll name your creations after homophobic slurs. To make things even more offensive, look at him. Look at his devilish smile. His four arms. Do you know what having four arms means? It means having four hands. What do hands do? They touch. That's right, Cofagrigus is into touching. This is clearly an attempt on Nintendo's part to subconsciously further the stereotype that all gay men are pedophiles. I'm on to you, Nintendo. And I'm not taking your bull****.

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GenesisSaga
03/26/11 1:33:00 PM
#30:


LOL

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swordz9
03/26/11 1:36:00 PM
#31:


XFD Cofagrigus comic.

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WazzupGenius00
03/26/11 1:46:00 PM
#32:


From: Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer | #016
Does anyone actually use Klink?


;_;

He's not on the list but I sure hope you hate Magnemite for being "a ****ing magnet"

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mnkboy907
03/26/11 1:49:00 PM
#33:


The boy in the middle and the blonde girl next to him seemed happy to see Cofagrigus. >_>

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 1:50:00 PM
#34:


Some kids are perverts.

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MajinZidane
03/26/11 1:53:00 PM
#35:


tag

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voltch
03/26/11 1:54:00 PM
#36:


tag

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 1:58:00 PM
#37:


all of the friends, all of the friends

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MajinZidane
03/26/11 2:42:00 PM
#38:


such good writeups mer's a friend

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Silver_Ermine
03/26/11 2:42:00 PM
#39:


The write ups are amazing and awesome and mer is a friend.

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 2:42:00 PM
#40:


XFD

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SuorGenoveffa
03/26/11 3:09:00 PM
#41:


Man I can forgive your placement of Cofagrigus because the write-up + comic was ****ing hilarious.
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Drakeryn
03/26/11 3:14:00 PM
#42:


Luvdisc comic amused me way too much.

Also spot-on Conkeldurr writeup IMO.


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GenesisTwilight
03/26/11 3:19:00 PM
#43:


From: Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer | #028
107. Conkeldurr

Overrated to hell and back. I don't care how useful he is in battle. I don't. Save it for your metagame douchebuddies. Conkeldurr is ugly as ****. Its name literally has "durr" in it. When it comes to pokemon, I really don't care much about your stats or how useful you are in battle. I care about whether or you are a friend. All my favorite pokemon are ****ing buddies. They're bros. They're friends. This guy? I'm sorry, I could never be friends with something that ugly. He's literally repulsive to look at. Timburr was alright, he was at least a bit cute. But this line just gets worse as it evolves. The veins popping out all over its body are nauseating, his face is stupid as hell looking, and he's permanently holding two stone pillars for no reason. Also, it should be mentioned again, his name has ****ing "durr" in it. Just bad decisions all around during the creative process here. Fighting pokemon are usually cool looking, but they really ****ed things up with this guy. He could've been awesome. But he's just gross.

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I love you

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 3:30:00 PM
#44:


more SOON ENOUGH

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 4:21:00 PM
#45:


105. Alomomola

Alomomola... augh. First of all, its name is kind of fun. And its design is... alright. Those are the only things about it resembling "pros". This was really a gigantic missed opportunity. Nintendo literally decided to make ANOTHER pink heart-shaped pure-water type, slightly larger than Luvdisc and with better stats, and then... Give them absolutely no association with each other. Nintendo literally just decided we needed another one. An evolution would've made sense. With all the hubbub around how much Luvdisc sucks, it evolving into something useful would only be logical. But nope, instead we just get a second, slightly more extravagant looking, dumbass pink heart-shaped fish. ****ing hell.

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mnkboy907
03/26/11 4:28:00 PM
#46:


lol, poor Luvdisc. Even GameFreak hates it.

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swordz9
03/26/11 4:29:00 PM
#47:


Alomomola..sometimes I swear they just like having Pokemon with names spelled the same way backwards.

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Mer_Mer_Yes_Mer
03/26/11 4:40:00 PM
#48:


104. Dugtrio

I've mentioned my distaste for multi-headed pokemon, but here we have something even worse. Dugtrio isn't one pokemon with three heads. It's just three pokemon. Diglett literally evolves by becoming friends with two other Digletts. That's so stupid. They could've done a lot of things with Diglett. He could've evolved into a bigger, more badass looking mole thing. He could evolved and come out of the ground. I dunno, something. But nope, they just decided to multiply him by 3 and call that an evolution. Augh. I mean, Diglett himself is awesome, so Dugtrio gets points for that, but really... the whole concept is stupid. What if the three of them start to hate each other?

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Furious Fura
03/26/11 4:40:00 PM
#49:


From: swordz9 | Posted: 3/27/2011 12:29:14 AM | #047
Alomomola..sometimes I swear they just like having Pokemon with names spelled the same way backwards.
http://myanimelist.net/animelist/swordz9


mind blown

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mnkboy907
03/26/11 4:48:00 PM
#50:


lololol, Pokemon Trainer is not pleased.

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