LogFAQs > #965078879

VampireCoyote posted...

I dont think that anyone should have any say in the matter unless they are the doctor or the Wielder of the Uterus. End of story.

They shouldn't have a say, but they should be involved in the decision-making process to enough of an extent to let them make an informed decision about whether or not they want to risk pregnancy with somebody that will/won't get an abortion if it happens. Like most aspects of relationships, open communication and informed consent are important.

Nichtcrawler X posted...

Children and birth control in general should be openly discussed by a couple. Just putting the attention on abortion is asking for knee-jerk reactions.

Indeed, but those discussions can generally come up fairly organically, without any immediate urgency. You might end up not having sex that night if you only realize on the way into bed that you aren't comfortable with the current birth control situation, but that's about the worst that will happen (unless you end up with a pregnancy because you decide to take the risk, but that's a failure of self-control rather than a failure of communication).

By contrast, a lot of couples tacitly assume they won't have to worry about abortion if they use birth control, so they just don't consider or discuss it until an accidental pregnancy actually happens. That's not a good time to discover you have fundamentally opposed opinions on abortion. It's a much better idea to discuss it early (ideally, before there's any risk of pregnancy at all) so everyone's on the same page if it happens. That discussion can indeed be emotionally charged, possibly even to the point of breaking up the couple, but I'd rather see couples with incompatible views on abortion break up before a pregnancy shows up than after.