LogFAQs > #960833414

I'll keep it brief but, I can appreciate you actually finally getting it, and like I've said before yeah people fuck up and ultimately it makes me glad to see people finally listen... even if it takes the 4th or 5th time.

turbopuns3 posted...

I was doing the literal thing I said people online offended by The Closer were doing a.k.a. maybe if you had more life experience with people in that demographic you would understand better. Hello? Earth to Steven? What makes you think you understand the strife of trans people when youve never seen it first hand?

This part here is exactly what got me so fed up last time as this was exactly what was glaring out so obviously. In a conversation about transphobia you were somehow redirecting all the empathy towards the person regurgitating transphobic talking points to an audience of millions of fans and completely dismissing the issues the trans folk had, who were the ones targeted.

turbopuns3 posted...

What got me started into this whole conversation was just that crappy urge to be correct on the internet that I think most of us can relate to in some capacity. I didnt turn up to just spread hate and hurt people. Just some typical white male ego trying to be the shit or whatever, on a topic the depth of which I couldnt see. I hope at the very least, it doesnt go down in history that my direct response to the particularly problematic jokes from the special was just oh, whats the matter? Cant take a joke about your genitals? Because I will readily admit (as you see) that Ive been wrong and a jerk and reckless and just awful. But I never thought the sentiment of just suck it up, buttercup made sense my whole thing was more along the lines of like, hey, I get that joke X hurt your feelings, but I feel like youre putting the whole man into a box based on that one joke and its slanting every single thing he says in your mind because you have no respect for him any more. So it was more like, I saw people on a scale of 1 to 10 being 11 angry, when like, if all the misinformation, slander, charged headlines, biased blog posts, etc. etc. werent so rampant and if the hurtful parts didnt close peoples ears to him, theyd be closer to like a 7 angry, or something?

I think there's a bit more to it than just wanting to be right to reflect on, which is also just the intense effect of celebrity worship at play here. You didn't need to defend Dave Chappelle, the man's part of the very peak of the social ladder and celebrities are all friends with each other, most people with power aren't going to step into the line of fire to speak up here and Dave's got other legacy friends like Jon Stewart to pat his back. The trans community aren't the ones coming out on top as more and more pop-culture icons spread resentment against us, and you really need to look at why you put so much effort into defending Dave and explicitly ignoring trans voices.

turbopuns3 posted...

I want to be an ally and make better decisions. I hope, though I have no doubt I said harmful things during that reflection, that people can see that the reason I put myself out there in the raw for a hundred minutes is that while yes that might cause some lesser collateral damage, at least it helps you to see me making an honest effort to understand. Because I do care. And in a similar fashion to how when I see or feel such discrimination with my own eyes and ears, maybe seeing and hearing a random white dude you'd already put into a box based on forum posts might help you understand people like me better too (the ones who are earnestly trying and just dangerously ignorant).

Like I don't want to add on too much but I do feel the need to point out the issue marginalized communities often run into with "allies" is their support can often be paper-thin and used as a cudgel against us, to dismiss the issues we face at the turn of a hat instead of hearing us when the criticism isn't convenient. This isn't unique to trans communities either as it's also something I absolutely keep in my mind to listen to black voices instead of instantly reacting without understanding.

Okay so I lied about keeping it particularly brief but I'm not lying about very much appreciating what I thought was well beyond hope of acknowledging your mistakes. It's not easy and I'm sure it gets even harder after each double-down and yet you still regained your clarity. My continued criticism in this post even is honestly because I understand you want to be a better ally so I think it's best to still nip at some vulnerabilities.