LogFAQs > #959383376

Tom Bombadil posted...

MoogleKupo141 posted...

its not impossible that Chapelles friend would have referred to herself as the father of her children. that specific word choice may not have been intentionally misgendering

I'll walk that point back a bit, then! Still find it hard to give him much benefit of the doubt, coupled with the wrong pronoun and the audience laughter and the everything else.

In my opinion, even if it's really the case that Chappelle's friend doesn't prefer retrospective pronouns for herself, it's still best practice to use them in front of an audience of millions who don't know that because that is the most frequent practice when speaking of trans people. This is up for debate, but I think it's the safest course of action. Bear in mind, I basically know nothing about her besides the snippets from this special I've heard, but I think that's kind of the case for most people, too - it's probably best for us not to make any really bold assumptions about her wishes. The problem is, the way Dave Chappelle speaks about her, I'm not especially convinced that he knew her really well, either, and he doesn't seem to particularly care too much about the particular landmines one has to think about when talking about a dead trans person. It's callous at best - even if his friend wouldn't have cared about this, it doesn't even matter due to how touchy a subject this is for everyone it impacts.