I dunno why these thoughts keep racing in my mind.
We are close to having our first child together. In a few months I will be 36 and he will be 49.
I keep thinking about how next year he will be 50 with a one year old. How she will be off to college when he will have retired. How when she will be 30 he will be nearing 80 (if we are all alive by then of course, I know anything can happen at any time). I feel incredible guilt that she will grow up with such an older dad and have less time with him than most other kids get to have with their parents. Their age difference will be more similar to what you have with a grandparent than a parent.
I feel so bad about it. I tell myself at least shes being born into a stable home. We are financially well accomplished and she will have everything she needs, college paid for, etc. My husband also looks much younger, he still has a head full of black hair and only some grey in his beard. Hes very active. But it still makes me feel awful when I really think about things.
You're being absolutely ridiculous.
I lost my mom when I was 7. Life goes on.
You should just be living today but whatever. You do you. You wanna live in those thoughts fine.