LogFAQs > #882457803

141. Krystal
https://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/starfox/images/0/0e/Krystalgun.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20090829170959
Origin: Star Fox
Nominator: kateee
Looks: 21
Personality: 21
Projected Wife Capacity: 35
Overall Score: 25.7

You ever give someone the benefit of the doubt and say to yourself “No, he couldn’t have possibly meant to make that innuendo,” only to find out he did mean to? That’s how I felt about Nintendo and Krystal’s furry appeal. I remember Star Fox Adventures coming out, me not being able to finish the part early on where you have to press a button super fast to move a log, and just giving up. Krystal made no impression on me. It wasn’t until I lost some of that childhood innocence (though this game came out when I was fourteen) and learned about furries that I thought about her in any real capacity. Sonic may be the king of furries, but Fox is the vizier.

Looks-wise, I am simply not a furry. I can understand how she might tick all of the boxes for a furry, and I guess her body is pretty good if you ignore the fur, but in the end, she’s a fox lady, and she’s not going to overcome that. I do like how she has human-style hair when Fox doesn’t. Her creators knew exactly what they were doing.

Personality-wise, Krystal is a piece of cardboard. She’s worse than that, actually. Cardboard you can do things with. You can twist it up, you can get it wet, you can make tubes out of it and store movie posters in it… Krystal is more like a gray slab of rock. The most you can do with it is crush it into smaller pieces. As an aside, she completely ruins the dynamic of Star Fox. Fox is the leader, Falco is the sarcastic guy, Slippy is the brains, and Peppy is the wise master. Replace Peppy with “the girl” and everything falls apart.

Now, I initially gave Krystal an average PWC, but then I did a once-over of her Wiki page and found I’d missed something: that she was psychic. I completely forgot about that. Nope, nope, nope. I have zero desire for my waifu to go rooting around in my brain to know if I’m lying, if I just watched some porn, if I’m attracted to another woman, that’s only going to cause problems. There’s no way this is going to work out. Even if her psychic abilities are limited just to emotions, this would be a nightmare.

Sorry, Krystal. Maybe Panther will take you.
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Not changing this sig until I decide to change this sig.
Started: July 6, 2005