Current Events > I encountered Ron DeSantis. It was a horrifying experience.

(+) Yeah! (+)

I was walking my dog when I noticed a sulfuric smell. I looked up and there was Ron DeSantis, foaming at the mouth, cutting himself with stones, and muttering in Latin. I said "What's your problem? Why are you the way you are? You have ruined the once great state of Florida and reduced it to a wasteland haunted by gators and other foul beasts."

DeSantis's eyes turned red and he pointed at me like that guy in Invasion of the Body Snatchers. He shreiked, "FOOL! You have no power here! Satan's Kingdom will be established on Earth and there is NOTHING you can do about it! It's all going according to plan. Today Florida, tomorrow the world!"

Terrified, I asked him, "Who are you?"

He answered, "My name is Legion, for we are many!" He then disappeared into a pile of smoke and fire.

These people are so evil. DEAR GOD FREE US FROM THEM!

-_-

This is bad and you should feel bad

I saw Ron DeSantis at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didnt want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, Oh, like youre doing now?
I was taken aback, and all I could say was Huh? but he kept cutting me off and going huh? huh? huh? and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like Sir, you need to pay for those first. At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually to prevent any electrical infetterence, and then turned around and winked at me. I dont even think thats a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

Nice copy pasta.

A few years ago, a mother and father decided they needed a break, so they wanted to head out for a night on the town. They called their most trusted babysitter. When the babysitter arrived, the two children were already fast asleep in bed. So the babysitter just got to sit around and make sure everything was okay with the children. Later that night, the babysitter got bored and went to watch TV, but she couldnt watch it downstairs because they did not have cable downstairs (the parents didnt want children watching too much garbage). So, she called them and asked them if she could watch cable in the parents room. Of course, the parents said it was ok, but the babysitter had one final request she asked if she could cover up the Ron Desantis statue outside the bedroom window with a blanket or cloth, at the very least close the blinds, because it made her nervous. The phone line was silent for a moment, and the father who was talking to the babysitter at the time said, Take the children and get out of the house we will call the police. We do not have a Ron Desantis statue.

The police found all three of the house occupants dead within three minutes of the call. No Ron Desantis statue was ever found.

https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/7/2/7/AADYzzAAE3dP.jpg

Ron DeSantis? More like Son ReDantis, amirite?

https://youtu.be/-aYLC9nY5eo?si=8vd644DD-lyGhFgI

Oh, Ronathan