Current Events > I want to learn how to be more likeable but it's so fucking weird

(+) Yeah! (+)

you literally need to be a smarter version of yourself so you can tell people what they want to hear

sounds more like you want to be manipulative

Just don't be selfish and don't be a dick. That's 90% of the battle right there lol

NeonTentacles posted...

Just don't be selfish and don't be a dick. That's 90% of the battle right there lol

i mean, people in general like me, but to a certain point. no one is like, really into me

i actually was best friends with a ceman for a while who lived in my city, but he moved away.

It's like describing how to pee. You just kind of do it

I think you are a fine poster

Jiek_Fafn posted...

It's like describing how to pee. You just kind of do it

having worked in restaurants i know it's all about creating experiences the people you are close to value. i'm just not good at knowing what people like or what they would be interested in. and it's not like describing how to pee because peeing is very mechanical and it depends on things being a certain way- so even if it is like peeing you should be able to explain how things are

MabusIncarnate posted...

I think you are a fine poster

90% of your thoughts are my fault

To be more likable you need to lift weights. I'm still the same weirdo anime fan but after lifting weights people are much more willing to listen about my favorite characters now, lol.

MuscleRobo posted...

To be more likable you need to lift weights. I'm still the same weirdo anime fan but after lifting weights people are much more willing to listen about my favorite characters now, lol.

that's silly but true i guess, people pay more attention to a fit guy

Most people are on because of smartphones. Try not to be on and see what happens.

Going through the same thing at work.

Its hard to get the balance right between trying to be likeable but not being a walk over or coming across as disengenuous / trying too hard.

Also one key thing Ive learnt is there is a massive difference between being liked and being respected.

ehhwhatever posted...

Most people are on because of smartphones. Try not to be on and see what happens.

alright... next time i go out i will leave my phone at home

MedeaLysistrata posted...

alright... next time i go out i will leave my phone at home

I meant by on was you people are socially functioning for a long time and you should take your phone with you. I guess it is an actors trick to try not be on.

ehhwhatever posted...

I meant by on was you people are socially functioning for a long time and you should take your phone with you. I guess it is an actors trick to try not be on.

hmm, i still don't understand

MedeaLysistrata posted...

hmm, i still don't understand

MedeaLysistrata posted...

hmm, i still don't understand

MedeaLysistrata posted...

hmm, i still don't understand

You are trying to make a step for being more social which tome is being on around people.

If the step that I am on becomes the plane upon which I live, I will soon forget that no single step is ever a staircase.
Craig D. Lounsbrough

ever since The Physical World us Toronto males have to be 'Always On'

MedeaLysistrata posted...

having worked in restaurants i know it's all about creating experiences the people you are close to value. i'm just not good at knowing what people like or what they would be interested in.

Have you tried asking?

cuttin_in_farm posted...

Have you tried asking?

yes, and once they tell me they like anime i'll be sure to become their best friend and watch anime with them, since, you know, they like anime

alternatively, "hey what do you see yourself doing with me?" as a non stupid question

MedeaLysistrata posted...

and it's not like describing how to pee because peeing is very mechanical and it depends on things being a certain way- so even if it is like peeing you should be able to explain how things are

I dont think we pee the same way at all then

MedeaLysistrata posted...

yes, and once they tell me they like anime i'll be sure to become their best friend and watch anime with them, since, you know, they like anime

What else do you like? Have you tried stating that and seeing if folks bounce off of you?

MedeaLysistrata posted...

alternatively, "hey what do you see yourself doing with me?" as a non stupid question

So is hey what do you see yourself doing with me a rumination phrase you are going to repeat when you are around people? Maybe pretend you are shopping and you are going along <<<<<< in a way moving, maybe you are on a escalator which consists of a motor-driven chain of individually linked steps on a track which cycle on a pair of tracks which keep the step tread horizontal.

Do you have other things to talk about besides anime?

A_Good_Boy posted...

Do you have other things to talk about besides anime?

it was an example, sorry

ehhwhatever posted...

So is hey what do you see yourself doing with me a rumination phrase you are going to repeat when you are around people?

lol

MedeaLysistrata posted...

it was an example, sorry

So you dont actually want to learn anything and this is a venting topic?

Because why didnt you answer his question?

Trying to guess what others want you to say just makes socializing exhausting and a chore. Id know, cause it's what I did throughout most my 20s.

When I threw caution to the wind and just started speaking my mind, socializing got a lot more fun and I learned to accept myself how I am a lot more.

My problem is I talk online like I already formed a relationship with everyone and no one understands when Im poking fun and when Im serious because I can't use body language and vocal tone like I do irl. And no one online expects you to treat them like a best bud out the gate.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Yup. Most venting is usually just 2 people allowing each other to get their issues out without trying to turn the conversation against each other.

I dont do this well, but ask people questions about themselves and pretend to be interested. Make the conversation about them and dont try to turn it back on yourself.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Yea, I hope my post didnt seem confrontational.

Im legit asking. I tried to ask fact finding questions that were getting ignored so
just wanted to clarify what TC wanted.