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Current Events > Hard Drive: Nintendo Instinctively Sues to Halt Mario Film's Production (satire)

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Hayame_Zero
12/02/22 3:50:18 PM
#1:


https://hard-drive.net/nintendo-instinctively-sues-to-halt-mario-films-production/

REDMOND, Wash. Following the premiere of the latest trailer for The Super Mario Bros. Movie, Nintendo has reflexively sued the producers of the film, sources have confirmed.

Oops, thats our bad, said Doug Bowser, president of Nintendo of America shortly after withdrawing a hastily issued lawsuit against Universal Pictures. We just saw a lot of people getting excited about a Nintendo thing online so we assumed it was coming from outside. Youll have to forgive us, Its not every day that something we do gets received relatively well. As such we have rescinded our lawsuit against the makers of The Super Mario Bros. Movie and believe we will be able to get most of the principal cast members out of incarceration just as quickly as possible.

The move is merely the latest in Nintendos long litigious history.

I would say this lawsuit was the shittiest thing theyve done in a while if they hadnt just canceled the biggest and most popular Smash Bros. tournament, said local gamer Kelsey McAdams, referencing Nintendos abrupt shutdown of the Smash World Tour earlier this week. Players, advertisers, broadcasters, all just fucked because on a whim Nintendo decided to end a wildly popular tournament. Its mind boggling how committed they are to alienating their fans. It doesnt surprise me at all that they had Seth Rogen arrested yesterday before they figured out what they were doing.

Lawyers for Nintendo defended their employers aggressive tactics, even if they were applied erroneously this time.

If this course of action surprises you, you must not be paying attention, said Richard Foreman, one of several attorneys that briefly worked on the case against the film.

Theres one little thing Nintendo does to stay relevant, and it aint releasing hardware thats up to modern expectations. Nope, its suing every man, woman, and child that we think might be so much as even thinking of dressing like Link for Halloween. We wont ever get them all, but well die trying, god damn it.

Its a weird approach to being an entertainment company, he added. But we remain committed to it.

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#2
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Tyranthraxus
12/02/22 4:16:17 PM
#3:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8rZV07igjdw

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https://i.imgur.com/dQgC4kv.jpg
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Choco
12/02/22 4:20:44 PM
#4:


that's what happened with the zelda netflix show

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https://i.imgur.com/286sD4e.png
http://error1355.com/ce/Choco.html
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Tyranthraxus
12/02/22 4:22:36 PM
#5:


Choco posted...
that's what happened with the zelda netflix show

there was never a zelda netflix show it was just some fan mockups

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It says right here in Matthew 16:4 "Jesus doth not need a giant Mecha."
https://i.imgur.com/dQgC4kv.jpg
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HylianFox
12/02/22 4:27:14 PM
#6:


Tyranthraxus posted...
there was never a zelda netflix show it was just some fan mockups

Personally, I'd watch a Zelda TV show that had Tom Holland playing every role
>_>

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refmon
12/02/22 4:29:22 PM
#7:


ProfessorKukui posted...
Believable


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Hayame_Zero
12/03/22 2:49:03 PM
#8:


Tyranthraxus posted...
there was never a zelda netflix show it was just some fan mockups
Most fan trailers have looked pretty bad. I think it could only work as animation

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