Current Events > A friend who owes you money ghosts you

(+) Yeah! (+)

A few thousand.

Do you pursue them still?

Don't think you can call that person a friend anymore.

A buddy of mine owes me about that, around 1700. I wouldn't have lent it to him if I couldn't afford it. Whether or not he pays me back doesn't matter to me. He needed it and I had the means to provide. It is what it is. We still talk every so often but honestly I think he forgot about it and that's alright.

Bass2 posted...

A few thousand.

Do you pursue them still?

You might want to rethink how you "pursue" them. Talking to them directly is probably useless. Give them a warning that you will go public all over social media about this person not paying you back your money. You can take this further by contacting their family, workplace, landlord etc. I'm not telling you what to do, just saying how you could take this further, if you really want your money.

I had a housemate (he was a foreigner and over here on a backpacking holiday, I guess from which country he came from is irrelevant) stay with me for 3 months, we got along quite well. His last 2 rent payment were late, but we had a face to face discussion the night before he left to see other parts of the country on a road trip. He assured me he'd get me the money within a few days. I sent a message after a week which got ghosted, then I think a month later he ghosted another.

I felt pretty helpless... But managed to get some petty revenge in the form of a Facebook status he made complete with all these photos of his road trip which his family had commented on. I waited til midnight then publically called him a thief on the post, explaining the situation. He didn't see it until the following morning so it was up for a long time(due to timezones, a lot of friends and family from his country would have seen it I assume)

He blocked and deleted me but at least I embarrassed him

If a friend asks you for money then you should either give it to them and tell them its a gift or just say no.

Ill never forget, my brother (biological) asked to borrow some money from me when we were both teenagers.

His car needed some kind of repair for like $200 and he needed to borrow some money.

I gave it to him and told him not to worry about paying it back.

Do this with everyone. Story just so happened to be my brother, but this is what Ive done in every scenario where I made the choice to give. But keep in mind that you have every right to just say no if you really cant handle the sacrifice.

Its a common thing, really. Never help if you expect anything in return.

CreekCo posted...

Its a common thing, really. Never help if you expect anything in return.

To add to your statement:

Dont just expect nothing in return; tell your friend up front that they dont have to pay you back.

Track them down and ask which kneecap is their favorite. Just that. Nothing else. Just make them scared.

I never give friends or family money that I'll actually miss, so if someone bounces after I've loaned them thousands I still don't think I'd care too much about it.

haloiscoolisbak posted...

I had a housemate (he was a foreigner and over here on a backpacking holiday, I guess from which country he came from is irrelevant) stay with me for 3 months, we got along quite well. His last 2 rent payment were late, but we had a face to face discussion the night before he left to see other parts of the country on a road trip. He assured me he'd get me the money within a few days. I sent a message after a week which got ghosted, then I think a month later he ghosted another.

I felt pretty helpless... But managed to get some petty revenge in the form of a Facebook status he made complete with all these photos of his road trip which his family had commented on. I waited til midnight then publically called him a thief on the post, explaining the situation. He didn't see it until the following morning so it was up for a long time(due to timezones, a lot of friends and family from his country would have seen it I assume)

He blocked and deleted me but at least I embarrassed him

I think you got scammed sir, you definitely messed up loaning to a guy you barely knew that had poor finances and missed rent twice in a row. This is something you do for someone you've known for years and are very close with as it is always a massive risk

Virgalyssa posted...

I think you got scammed sir, you definitely messed up loaning to a guy you barely knew that had poor finances and missed rent twice in a row. This is something you do for someone you've known for years and are very close with as it is always a massive risk

Well, yeah. I didn't loan him money so to speak, he just missed the last 2 rent payments before he moved out, he paid the first 10 or so(rent is paid weekly in Australia) I had to cover his share as the real estate took the rent out of my account and well, I wasn't planning to move out anytime soon. I thought he was just a bit busy for the final 2 weeks of him living there as he was planning the next part of his holiday, hell he might have not intended to scam me originally but saw a consequence free opportunity to save some money once he was in another state and his only link to me was through social media

i've borrowed money to friends before but never that large of an amount. im not a fucking bank...

Definitely. File papers and sue their ass. I may not be able to find them, but the courts probably can. They're not a friend if they pull that shit.

if someone asks you to borrow large amounts of money and get mad if you refuse, then trust me, you're better off without them. i definitely dont need fake ass friends like that...