Current Events > Secrets of Dumbledore is actually legitimately terrible, wow

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Bio1590
06/04/22 12:55:02 AM
#1:


The story is pants-on-head stupid and doesn't even make sense half the time plus some of the acting/line delivery is just atrocious.

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#2
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#3
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Bio1590
06/04/22 1:05:13 AM
#4:


JHBPhD posted...


you know, it just doesnt hit the same way

It really doesn't >_>

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VitalGetPrank
06/04/22 2:57:06 AM
#5:


The Grindelwald stuff could have been really good on its own but they had to shove it in with this Fantastic Beats bullshit and ruin it completely. If I ever meet the guy responsible for that decision I'm castrating him.

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#6
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MICHALECOLE
06/04/22 3:12:13 AM
#7:


VitalGetPrank posted...
The Grindelwald stuff could have been really good on its own but they had to shove it in with this Fantastic Beats bullshit and ruin it completely. If I ever meet the guy responsible for that decision I'm castrating him.
Now thats just an overreaction
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deoxxys
06/04/22 3:14:48 AM
#8:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

has this been edited lol?

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saspa
06/04/22 4:58:07 AM
#9:


I mean... all of the harry potter movies are terrible save for the first 2.

I did wonder how the beasts movies made so much when they didn't have the words "harry potter" in the title. Heck I used to be a live-hard harry potter books fan and even I never even read fantastic beasts or the secrets of quidditch books, although at one point I wanted to

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teep_
06/04/22 5:02:33 AM
#10:


saspa posted...
I mean... all of the harry potter movies are terrible save for the first 2.
The third Harry potter film is the best one, so...

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ultimate reaver
06/04/22 5:08:19 AM
#11:


"secrets of dumbledore" is such a bad title

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The_Creep_2020
06/04/22 5:15:47 AM
#12:


teep_ posted...
The third Harry potter film is the best one, so...
Yup

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Xethuminra
06/04/22 5:17:50 AM
#13:


ultimate reaver posted...
"secrets of dumbledore" is such a bad title
It'll inspire a trend of similarly titled movies

"Return of Secrets"
"Secrets of Han Solo"
"Secrets of Bloodborne"
"Secrets of Zelda"
"Secrets of the Abyss"

Etc
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Kami_no_Kami
06/04/22 5:29:53 AM
#14:


teep_ posted...
The third Harry potter film is the best one, so...
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/2/8/0/AASfTXAADTQA.jpg
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saspa
06/04/22 5:35:26 AM
#15:


Nerd rage... rising...

The movie literally starts with harry doing magic outside of school, which was already established as a no-no plot point in the movies themselves beforehand.

Incidentally it also ends in a similar dumb way, a freeze frame of HP's face riding the firebolt wtf. I remember walking out of the theater fuming at HP's dumb face XD

Edit post above me knows what's up

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DeadBankerDream
06/04/22 6:27:39 AM
#16:


The only Harry Potter movie I like is the second one.

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tri sapphire
06/04/22 6:41:45 AM
#17:


teep_ posted...
The third Harry potter film is the best one, so...
That's just a slight vestige of the second best novel filtering into the adaptation.

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saspa
06/04/22 6:48:39 AM
#18:


ultimate reaver posted...
"secrets of dumbledore" is such a bad title

Perhaps they intended it to be secretions of dumbledore?

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UnholyMudcrab
06/04/22 6:59:25 AM
#19:


Kami_no_Kami posted...
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/2/8/0/AASfTXAADTQA.jpg
It's such an utterly bizarre way to end the movie

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Cobra1010
06/04/22 7:08:52 AM
#20:


JK rowling is a hack. She had some great ideas building the harry potter world but once you try to have everything make sense and be logical for actual story telling, a lot of stuff is bullshit.

Best example is quidditch games only ends when the snitch is caught thus one of the games lasting 3 months long. And spells like repairo and the cleaning spells shouldnt exist.

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DocDelicious
06/04/22 7:12:26 AM
#21:


Fantastic Beasts would have been so much better as a mockumentary.

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lilORANG
06/04/22 8:00:39 AM
#22:


Sadly I agree TC. I really wanted to like it bc I love the franchise and honestly I thought Crimes of Grindelwald was ok, but this 3rd one was moronic. The plot itself was dumb, but also it just seemingly ignored all the build up from the second one.

The cast was good though. Jacob and Lally really shine for me.

That said Prisoner of Azkaban was definitely the worst of the main 8 movies. People have a hard on for Alfonso Cuaron, and he has some great stuff, but he was really the wrong choice for a HP movie.

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saspa
06/04/22 8:05:56 AM
#23:


The real weird thing is that his good movies... didn't come out until after he made that pos movie. Or at least his more famous good ones. I don't know if his old stuff is any good I just watched Children of Men which I actually really liked, and Gravity which I liked. Both came out after hp 3.

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DarkRoast
06/04/22 8:26:15 AM
#24:


I'm Grindelwald, savvy?

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Jiek_Fafn
06/04/22 8:38:03 AM
#25:


The third one is straight forward and simple but does it in a super awkward way. It literally takes any confusing plot lines from previous movies and says "oh, that wasn't true" and dumps them just to have resolution.

Then we get a pretty straightforward almost kids movie about Newt on his quest to stop fascist wizards. Which, considering he's such a major player is odd that he's never mentioned in Harry's time.

I'm glad they mostly tied up everything. The series can end.

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Bio1590
06/04/22 6:23:18 PM
#26:


I tried to finish the movie today but still couldn't bring myself to do it >_>

I just can't believe "btw we're going to randomly clear Grindelwald of all his crimes and let him run in this election that's conveniently happening" is a real plot point.

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DrizztLink
06/04/22 6:26:09 PM
#27:


Bio1590 posted...
I tried to finish the movie today but still couldn't bring myself to do it >_>

I just can't believe "btw we're going to randomly clear Grindelwald of all his crimes and let him run in this election that's conveniently happening" is a real plot point.
If the Crimes of Grindelwald are erased in The Secrets of Dumbledore, then one logically expects The Secrets of Dumbledore to be erased by the next Nouns of ProperNoun

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Mibahlzitch
06/04/22 6:26:45 PM
#28:


Bio1590 posted...
I tried to finish the movie today but still couldn't bring myself to do it >_>

I just can't believe "btw we're going to randomly clear Grindelwald of all his crimes and let him run in this election that's conveniently happening" is a real plot point.
I mean,they're going to let Trump run for president again in real life.

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Bio1590
06/04/22 6:27:08 PM
#29:


DrizztLink posted...

If the Crimes of Grindelwald are erased in The Secrets of Dumbledore, then one logically expects The Secrets of Dumbledore to be erased by the next Nouns of ProperNoun

Fantastics Beasts: The Ship of Theseus!

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Bio1590
06/04/22 6:29:01 PM
#30:


Mibahlzitch posted...

I mean,they're going to let Trump run for president again in real life.

This is literal Wizard Hitler being allowed to run as a candidate for the head of an organization that's essentially the Wizards' United Nations

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#31
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MistyFan462
06/04/22 6:43:33 PM
#32:


What're the secrets?

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cousinvini
06/04/22 6:44:05 PM
#33:


It was a good thing I've only ever watched the first movie then

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lilORANG
06/04/22 6:48:23 PM
#34:


They keep calling it an election, but there's not really much voting is there. Magical air bud just sorta picks who it wants.

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Bio1590
06/04/22 7:08:54 PM
#35:


cousinvini posted...
It was a good thing I've only ever watched the first movie then

I mean the second movie isn't great but it's at least serviceable.

I don't understand how this movie is a 6.3 on IMDB, that's not even a full star lower than the first one.

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Garlands_Soul
06/04/22 7:13:10 PM
#36:


I still can't get over the dumbass wizard names like fucking Dumbledore? Really? He sounds like a dumb oaf. Grindelwald sounds like some shit I'd see in an mlm candle shop

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#37
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AngelsNAirwav3s
06/04/22 7:21:19 PM
#38:


Crimes of Grindlewald I at least thought in book form it might have worked as a good story, but was hot garbage as a movie.

Is Secrets of Dumbledore the same?

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Garlands_Soul
06/04/22 7:21:37 PM
#39:


They literally have a guy named hagrid that is haggard

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lilORANG
06/04/22 7:23:59 PM
#40:


AngelsNAirwav3s posted...
Crimes of Grindlewald I at least thought in book form it might have worked as a good story, but was hot garbage as a movie.

Is Secrets of Dumbledore the same?
I thought Veined was a mess but there were some twisted and surprises and stuff that made me interested for the sequel. Secrets of D basically ignores the unresolved plot lines in Crimes and tells a very simple straightforward story about a big dumb election

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ellis123
06/04/22 7:28:14 PM
#41:


Bio1590 posted...
This is literal Wizard Hitler being allowed to run as a candidate for the head of an organization that's essentially the Wizards' United Nations
https://gamefaqs.gamespot.com/a/user_image/8/8/9/AAEv3mAADTZh.jpg

I mean, you aren't wrong with your description of Grindlewald...

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littlebro07
06/04/22 7:28:41 PM
#42:


I liked it better than the last one but mainly cause all the Dumbledore stuff

its like Attack of the Clones mostly being garbage but all the Obi-Wan stuff was awesome

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