Current Events > Trans/NB people, how did you pick a new name?

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TeaMilk
01/26/22 2:40:01 PM
#1:


I've actually IDed as nonbinary for like 5 years now and I still haven't picked a different name. Of course not everyone does this, but I don't like my birthname at all. I go by a shortened version of it professionally which is better, but its still a gendered name. Nothing I've considered really feels 'right' and maybe I'm scared of asking people irl to call me something different

I've sorta considered asking my grandma to give me a Cantonese name, as those tend to be far less gender specific. I dont know if that'd be weird though, because I don't even speak the language or know my grandma that well

Anyway whats your guys' experience? Especially interested in NB ppl if anyone's out there

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#2
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TeaMilk
01/26/22 2:42:03 PM
#3:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Lol true, I go by 'melon' in online spaces, but id feel silly asking people to call me that irl. I know there's no rules though

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greyfox747
01/26/22 2:42:59 PM
#4:


Im a binary trans woman, and l picked the name that my parents would have given me if I was afab. It just clicked with me and I never really seriously considered other names, I feel like I really nailed it with this one

It was still a little weird at first, but it passed pretty quickly once people started to actually call me it

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DeathDeathSong
01/26/22 2:44:23 PM
#5:


ive been going by "danni" since i was like, 11, and i didnt come out until i was 22, so honestly it was just convenient to keep that name. besides, i really like being called danni, and i always am tickled when people think its my birth name

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Michael_Booth
01/26/22 2:46:43 PM
#6:


Why not use "Lon"?
It's a male and female name:
https://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-lon-998975.htm
https://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-lon-532245.htm
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TeaMilk
01/26/22 2:49:43 PM
#7:


greyfox747 posted...
Im a binary trans woman, and l picked the name that my parents would have given me if I was afab. It just clicked with me and I never really seriously considered other names, I feel like I really nailed it with this one

It was still a little weird at first, but it passed pretty quickly once people started to actually call me it
Aw thats nice :) I'm glad u had that option and it fit well for you

DeathDeathSong posted...
ive been going by "danni" since i was like, 11, and i didnt come out until i was 22, so honestly it was just convenient to keep that name. besides, i really like being called danni, and i always am tickled when people think its my birth name
Oh nice, thats cool you didn't have to go through any awkwardness with a name change. I dont think my name really has any gender neutral nickname forms, its kinda just 2 girl names crammed together lol

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LostForest
01/26/22 3:15:37 PM
#8:


I'm agender but I never changed my first name because I don't mind it that much. (Though I have given it thought once or twice)

I actually did change my last name when I got married and took my wife's last name which was only a couple years after I started to identify as nb, and it felt like a fresh start :D

TeaMilk posted...
and maybe I'm scared of asking people irl to call me something different

This, I can relate to though. Im too awkward to correct people when they misgender me, so I sure as shit don't think I'll ever be confident enough to ask them to call me an entirely new name.

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Femputer
01/26/22 3:33:51 PM
#9:


I love hearing stuff like this so tag. Good luck TC!

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gunplagirl
01/26/22 3:35:54 PM
#10:


I always liked one name because it sounded like the name for a sexy librarian. But my family has this thing with M middle names and I didn't feel sexy librarian-y enough to have that as my first name. So then I rattled off names that sounded good and it all sort of resulted in my current name. Plus when I looked at the meaning of my names years later I realized I was always meant to have my name.

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Compsognathus
01/26/22 3:44:36 PM
#11:


One of my friends was previously named Leia. When he came out he changed his name to Luke.

He is a Star Wars fan.

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bnui_ransder
01/26/22 3:47:29 PM
#12:


For my friend, they just shot names at me and then shot names back at them randomly until they heard one that just gave them that feel

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Femputer
01/26/22 3:48:09 PM
#13:


Compsognathus posted...
One of my friends was previously named Leia. When he came out he changed his name to Luke.

He is a Star Wars fan.
That's fuckin rad

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Medussa
01/26/22 3:49:11 PM
#14:


Compsognathus posted...
One of my friends was previously named Leia. When he came out he changed his name to Luke.

He is a Star Wars fan.

i really want to believe this, but it just seems too... redditkarmafarming?

edit:tongue firmly in cheek. i'd also really like to believe that was obvious, but i guess it's safer to make it explicit.

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Slaya4
01/26/22 3:52:56 PM
#15:


I mean... Melon is a cool name.

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Machete
01/26/22 4:07:35 PM
#16:


I'm in the neutral-male range and I am content with my birth name

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ElatedVenusaur
01/26/22 5:28:54 PM
#17:


I never minded my nickname, so I picked a female name with the same nickname. Boring, I know, but it fit perfectly.

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Dreepapult
01/26/22 5:32:17 PM
#18:


So is tea a trans woman? I always thought she was afab

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Femputer
01/26/22 5:33:16 PM
#19:


Dreepapult posted...
So is tea a trans woman? I always thought she was afab
Their pronouns are in their sig. And no need to speculate about their personal details imo

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Lost_All_Senses
01/26/22 5:33:25 PM
#20:


You should use my first name. I'll start using my middle name.

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DespondentDeity
01/26/22 5:37:33 PM
#21:


Dreepapult posted...
So is tea a trans woman? I always thought she was afab

its also addressed in the first post

I wasnt gonna change at first because I was given an androgynous name at birth, but Ive loved this particular female name for about 15 years now so I figured what the hell its mine now. :)

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Dreepapult
01/26/22 5:40:50 PM
#22:


Femputer posted...
Their pronouns are in their sig. And no need to speculate about their personal details imo
I mean is it offensive or what? I'm a dude. I wouldn't be offended if someone asked if I was a dude.

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Southernfatman
01/26/22 5:43:05 PM
#23:


I have one if I ever decide to "go farther" or whatever is a more appropriate way to put that. It's just one I always liked and has the same initial as my current name. It's not the total feminine version of my name, but it's sort of close. I prefer it to a closer alternative. I use it a lot for online stuff or when I can create my own female characters in video games.

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Femputer
01/26/22 5:48:17 PM
#25:


Dreepapult posted...
I mean is it offensive or what? I'm a dude. I wouldn't be offended if someone asked if I was a dude.
It can be offensive. Im not speaking as to whether TC may or may not be offended; it's just generally inconsiderate and irrelevant info

I don't mind being asked it either, but there are people who would be uncomfortable with a question like that, so I don't ask it out mindfulness

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Dreepapult
01/26/22 5:52:44 PM
#26:


Femputer posted...
It can be offensive. Im not speaking as to whether TC may or may not be offended; it's just generally inconsiderate and irrelevant info

I don't mind being asked it either, but there are people who would be uncomfortable with a question like that, so I don't ask it out mindfulness
I guess. I feel sometimes we're overly sensitive as a society. Like kind of hard to take seriously. Maybe I just can't relate, idk.

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Medussa
01/26/22 5:56:20 PM
#27:


anyone else "use" one new name for a while, but then want to change again? i like my chosen name, but i like another one more. it's just a lot more androgynous than i'd like (and it's moderatly anachronistic), so i rejected it the first time through. but over the years i've warmed to it, especially since it has a diminutive i really like.

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DespondentDeity
01/26/22 7:19:16 PM
#28:


Medussa posted...
anyone else "use" one new name for a while, but then want to change again? i like my chosen name, but i like another one more. it's just a lot more androgynous than i'd like (and it's moderatly anachronistic), so i rejected it the first time through. but over the years i've warmed to it, especially since it has a diminutive i really like.

I havent started using my new name irl yet but I told the people I care about what it is, and now theres another one that I think is just as cool. I might ask a few people what they think, but I wanted to wait a bit for this exact reason lol.

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Dreepapult
01/26/22 7:22:58 PM
#29:


Who posted

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TeaMilk
01/28/22 3:59:47 PM
#30:


Michael_Booth posted...
Why not use "Lon"?
It's a male and female name:
https://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-lon-998975.htm
https://www.babycenter.com/baby-names-lon-532245.htm
Hmm thanks for the suggestion, I'll consider it... I've thought of just 'mel' too but I dunno

LostForest posted...
I'm agender but I never changed my first name because I don't mind it that much. (Though I have given it thought once or twice)

I actually did change my last name when I got married and took my wife's last name which was only a couple years after I started to identify as nb, and it felt like a fresh start :D

This, I can relate to though. Im too awkward to correct people when they misgender me, so I sure as shit don't think I'll ever be confident enough to ask them to call me an entirely new name.
Thanks for sharing! I hope you are able to find the confidence to correct people someday. I get it feels hard to do, I hope it becomes more normalized.

Compsognathus posted...
One of my friends was previously named Leia. When he came out he changed his name to Luke.

He is a Star Wars fan.
Lmao thats great

Slaya4 posted...
I mean... Melon is a cool name.
Thank you :') im kinda worried of it coming off as silly. I remember a classmate in college laughing at my screenname being melon, and I never found out why

Lost_All_Senses posted...
You should use my first name. I'll start using my middle name.
Oh shit "Lost" would be a badass name

Dreepapult posted...
I mean is it offensive or what? I'm a dude. I wouldn't be offended if someone asked if I was a dude.
I mean it just kinda shows you didn't read anything >_> I say I'm nonbinary in the first line of the topic. I dont expect everyone to notice my pronouns in my sig, but given the context here

Btw do you know why I have you tagged as poopboy? I remember you made some poop related topic a while back but I don't recall the details

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TeaMilk
01/29/22 12:04:31 AM
#31:


Bump :0

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TeaMilk
01/31/22 1:37:22 AM
#32:


bumpin again, dont want this to purge YET

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Slaya4
02/01/22 12:12:16 AM
#33:


TeaMilk posted...
Thank you :') im kinda worried of it coming off as silly. I remember a classmate in college laughing at my screenname being melon, and I never found out why

One of my ex coworkers name was Percilla and she went by Purse. I don't think it's that weird. If Melon is who you are then fuck it you're Melon.

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Smackems
02/01/22 12:14:22 AM
#34:


Lon Lon Tea Milk

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Smackems
02/01/22 12:15:34 AM
#35:


I mean hell I go by Smack to like 75% of the people I regularly talk to. People may think your name is weird at first but they get used to it and don't give a fuck

Unless it's something like Diarrhea or Explosion I guess

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Ruvan22
02/01/22 8:29:03 AM
#36:


Smackems posted...
I mean hell I go by Smack to like 75% of the people I regularly talk to. People may think your name is weird at first but they get used to it and don't give a fuck

Unless it's something like Diarrhea or Explosion I guess

Your name is Smackems Diarrhea Explosion?
Is that possessive? "Like Smackem's Diarrhea Explosion"? Or cause effect? Like "Smackems (leads to) Diarrhea Explosion"
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DespondentDeity
02/01/22 10:52:46 AM
#37:


Actually smack constipates you

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SSJGrimReaper
02/01/22 10:57:48 AM
#38:


Ruvan22 posted...
Smackems Diarrhea Explosion


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#39
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gunplagirl
02/01/22 11:03:11 AM
#40:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Every time you do that, blow an airhorn in your ear. You'll either learn or you'll be deaf.

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Smackems
02/01/22 8:59:55 PM
#41:


I did a Smackems Diarrhea Explosion earlier

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Ruvan22
02/01/22 10:12:16 PM
#42:


Smackems posted...
I did a Smackems Diarrhea Explosion earlier

We are all very proud of you
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Gwynevere
02/01/22 10:20:19 PM
#43:


I've recently been coming to terms with the fact that I'm probably NB, but have no interest in changing my name. I have a dude's name fwiw

I have a pretty apathetic view on both gender and names, along with most other labels, so I'm not much help


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