Current Events > For some reason, I wrote a nursery rhyme about a False Hydra.

(+) Yeah! (+)

In most respects, Little Lorna was a precious little girl
With chubby rosy cheeks and bouncing ginger curls

She listened to her lessons and she ate all of her sprouts
She cleaned up all her messes and she was never heard to shout

In all her life, she had just one sin that she could never satisfy
Despite her parents' scoldings, Little Lorna loved to lie

She'd come home from her lessons and talk about her day
She'd tell tall tales to Daddy Doug and loving Mama Mae

She'd play with Puppy Pete in the fields behind her house
And forge a fib about a talking purple polka-dotted mouse

She'd lie just for the sake of it, the happiness it brought her
She never thought her lying would lead to such a slaughter

In the end, it was a harmless little lie that twisted things askew
For in the dripping darkness, it was this lie that came true

It was born under her house, a beast of flesh and teeth
A monstrous, bloated thing that rested just beneath

Little Lorna saw it first, her pale and sallow child
When it stretched a head up to her room with a pointed, hungry smile

In just one bite, it ate the growling Puppy Pete
In a rapid blur of fur and blood and bone and meat

And when Little Lorna went to scream, it did a dreadful thing
It licked its bloodied lips and it began to sing

"There is no reason to be sad, so don't you even cry.
"You never had a puppy, your puppy was a lie."

"There is no reason to be scared, so don't you ever fear.
"I'm just a little fib and I was never even here."

And it slunk back to the darkness and Little Lorna went to sleep
For there surely never was a dog that she called Puppy Pete

Little Lorna was a lonely girl who played alone behind her house
She'd weave a web of falsehoods to the grasshoppers and grouse

And when she went inside to have a little lunch
She saw it eating Mama Mae with a deep and happy crunch

Little Lorna turned to flee, but at once escape denied her
For she met three heads that came together in a terrifying choir

"There is no reason to be sad, you don't need to say goodbye.
"You never had a mommy, your mommy was a lie."

"There is no reason to be scared, so don't you ever fear.
"I'm just a little fib and I was never even here."

And it crept back beneath the floor as Little Lorna crafted a buffet
For there surely never was a woman that she called Mama Mae

Little Lorna was a tired girl who scrubbed the floors and cooked the meals
And spin a shady story to the frying chops of veal

And when she went to greet her father with a warm and happy hug
She saw it chewing on the meal that once was Daddy Doug

She fell down to her knees and her head began to swim
Surrounded by a dozen heads that hummed a loathsome hymn

"There is no reason to be sad, you shouldn't even try.
"You never had a daddy, your daddy was a lie."

"There is no reason to be scared, so don't you ever fear.
"I'm just a little fib and I was never even here."

And she dusted off her dress as it retreated 'neath the rug
For there surely never was a man that she called Daddy Doug

Little Lorna was an orphan girl who lived in a house too big
And she was out of food with only water left to swig

She watched it filled the room with a hundred smiling heads
And with something much like happiness, Little Lorna knew that she was dead

One head slithered forth on a long and ghastly neck
And deep inside her heart, Little Lorna knew what to expect

It wrapped itself around her, embracing its creator
And it opened up its mouth and began to serenade her

"There is no reason to be sad, you aren't really going to die.
"You never even had a life, your existence was a lie."

"I thank you for your lying, Little Lorna, mother dear."
"For without your little fib, I was never even here."

And it sank its teeth into her skin, she would never have a mourner
For there surely never was a girl that we called Little Lorna