Current Events > Dad Joke Topic

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bndluesr 07/28/21 4:36:29 PM #1:	I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered. --- "Stop the world, i want to get out." - jhneme "Profound Quote" <cite>bndluesr posted [p:956550821] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Spidey5 07/28/21 4:36:56 PM #2:	Tag --- https://imgur.com/wfUGrp5 https://imgur.com/Sus70Yp https://imgur.com/3Alq6H7 https://imgur.com/cjVX1u8 <cite>Spidey5 posted [p:956550832] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Tag</quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
David1988 07/28/21 4:38:06 PM #3:	I wonder if theres good dad vaccine jokes, like you got the vaccine son? insert crude joke --- Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. <cite>David1988 posted [p:956550871] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>I wonder if theres good dad vaccine jokes, like you got the vaccine son? insert crude joke </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Alteres 07/28/21 4:40:07 PM #4:	Evol posted... https://twitter.com/senorcito/status/1420372713294680064?s=21 Lost_All_Senses posted... Wait. He likes dick but he doesn't like it deep? Sounds like he's half assing it. --- ........the ghost in the machine... IGN: Fox, FC: 5344-2646-0982 <cite>Alteres posted [p:956550933] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote><cite>Evol posted... </cite> <quote>https://twitter.com/senorcito/status/1420372713294680064?s=21</quote> <cite>Lost_All_Senses posted... </cite> <quote>Wait. He likes dick but he doesn't like it deep? Sounds like he's half assing it.</quote> </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
masterpug53 07/28/21 4:41:32 PM #5:	Two muffins are baking next to one another in the oven. One turns to the other and says 'boy, sure is hot in here!' The other replies 'holy shit, a talking muffin!' --- Simple questions deserve long-winded answers that no one will bother to read. https://imgur.com/eW67nT8 - Artwork by Wii_Shaker <cite>masterpug53 posted [p:956550986] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Two muffins are baking next to one another in the oven. One turns to the other and says 'boy, sure is hot in here!' The other replies 'holy shit, a talking muffin!' </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Xethuminra 07/28/21 4:42:16 PM #6:	A man walks into a bar. .... what? Thats the joke. <cite>Xethuminra posted [p:956551004] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>A man walks into a bar. .... what? Thats the joke. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
WilliamPorygon 07/28/21 4:44:34 PM #7:	A single bird can't make a good pun, but toucan --- Dolphins are people too! https://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/1404-cetacea-cove <cite>WilliamPorygon posted [p:956551069] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>A single bird can't make a good pun, but toucan </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bndluesr 07/28/21 4:50:42 PM #8:	Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream cone? ~~Because he got hit by a bus~~ --- "Stop the world, i want to get out." - jhneme "Profound Quote" <cite>bndluesr posted [p:956551239] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheRadiant 07/28/21 4:52:01 PM #9:	Two antennas got married, the wedding was alright but the reception was incredible! --- She/her <cite>TheRadiant posted [p:956551280] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Two antennas got married, the wedding was alright but the reception was incredible! </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
R1masher 07/28/21 4:52:48 PM #10:	The best joke dad ever pulled off was convincing the world he didnt exist --- R1R1R1R1R1R1 <cite>R1masher posted [p:956551311] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>The best joke dad ever pulled off was convincing the world he didnt exist </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smackems 07/28/21 4:58:50 PM #11:	I used to be addicted to soap I'm clean now --- Common sense charged before shipping - some dude <cite>Smackems posted [p:956551521] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>I used to be addicted to soap I'm clean now </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Cemith 07/28/21 4:59:53 PM #12:	What's blue and smells like red paint? ~~Blue paint.~~ --- CE's resident Smash Player \|\| https://i.ibb.co/2vRbyC0/Rosa-6.png "Friends don't let friends watch The Big Bang Theory" - mogar002 <cite>Cemith posted [p:956551561] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Xenozoa425 07/28/21 5:00:39 PM #13:	Hi afraid for the calendar, I'm dad. --- "Let food be thy medicine." -Hippocrates https://nutritionfacts.org/ <cite>Xenozoa425 posted [p:956551591] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Hi afraid for the calendar, I'm dad. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
masterpug53 07/28/21 5:02:14 PM #14:	Didja hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster! --- Simple questions deserve long-winded answers that no one will bother to read. https://imgur.com/eW67nT8 - Artwork by Wii_Shaker <cite>masterpug53 posted [p:956551641] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Didja hear about the woman who backed into a fan? Disaster! </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheRadiant 07/28/21 5:02:14 PM #15:	Two fish swim into a concrete wall one looks to the other and says ~~"Dam!"~~ --- She/her <cite>TheRadiant posted [p:956551642] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Two fish swim into a concrete wall one looks to the other and says "Dam!" </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
dj1200 07/28/21 7:44:53 PM #16:	What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? ~~You can't hear an enzyme.~~ --- "It was so ridiculous and I have so many feelings about it." -Virtual Energies <cite>dj1200 posted [p:956556845] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can't hear an enzyme. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bndluesr 07/29/21 2:16:09 PM #17:	dj1200 posted... What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? ~~You can't hear an enzyme.~~ xD --- "Stop the world, i want to get out." - jhneme "Profound Quote" <cite>bndluesr posted [p:956580574] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>dj1200 posted... </cite> <quote>What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can't hear an enzyme.</quote>xD </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
TheRadiant 07/29/21 2:17:09 PM #18:	dj1200 posted... What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? ~~You can't hear an enzyme.~~ What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? ~~I wouldn't pay to have a garbanzo bean on my chest~~ --- She/her <cite>TheRadiant posted [p:956580600] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>dj1200 posted... </cite> <quote>What's the difference between an enzyme and a hormone? You can't hear an enzyme.</quote>What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I wouldn't pay to have a garbanzo bean on my chest </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Kitt 07/29/21 2:22:05 PM #19:	Why did Harrison Ford crash his airplane? ~~Because he was so low~~ --- I'm a little teapot blowing off steam. https://imgur.com/pmc9XsI https://imgur.com/p6Wfowq <cite>Kitt posted [p:956580751] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Why did Harrison Ford crash his airplane? Because he was so low </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
CapnMuffin 07/29/21 2:29:44 PM #20:	I finally made a playlist for when I go hiking. It's got music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. ~~Its my trail mix.~~ <cite>CapnMuffin posted [p:956581007] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>I finally made a playlist for when I go hiking. It's got music from Peanuts, The Cranberries, and Eminem. Its my trail mix. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bndluesr 07/29/21 6:08:52 PM #21:	What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? ~~My ass~~ --- "Stop the world, i want to get out." - jhneme "Profound Quote" <cite>bndluesr posted [p:956587702] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? My ass </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
Smackems 07/29/21 6:13:32 PM #22:	Oh man this got good --- Common sense charged before shipping - some dude <cite>Smackems posted [p:956587868] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Oh man this got good </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
newhorrorguy 07/29/21 7:05:47 PM #23:	Once a mexican magician vowed to disappear on the count of three "Uno!" "Dos" Poof He vanished without a tres. --- Joyrock/octillIery/DSFlashlight <cite>newhorrorguy posted [p:956589438] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>Once a mexican magician vowed to disappear on the count of three "Uno!" "Dos" Poof He vanished without a tres. </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
bndluesr 07/29/21 9:00:27 PM #24:	I'd avoid the sushi if I were you. ~~It's a little fishy!~~ --- "Stop the world, i want to get out." - jhneme "Profound Quote" <cite>bndluesr posted [p:956592974] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>I'd avoid the sushi if I were you. It's a little fishy! </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
YugiNoob 07/29/21 9:55:14 PM #25:	When is a door not a door? ~~When it's ajar~~ A photon checked into a hotel, and the bellhop asked if he needed help with his bags. ~~The photon said "No thanks, I'm traveling light"~~ --- Bun bun :3 <cite>YugiNoob posted [p:956594686] in Dad Joke T... [t:79587457]...</cite> <quote>When is a door not a door? When it's ajar A photon checked into a hotel, and the bellhop asked if he needed help with his bags. The photon said "No thanks, I'm traveling light" </quote> ... Copied to Clipboard!
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Current Events > Dad Joke Topic (+) Yeah! (+)

Current Events > Dad Joke Topic