Current Events > Dear CE I need bro relationship advice. This is a pathetic situation (Warning)

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I am 30. I've been friends with this friend since 12. Lately, we've been arguing a lot but not too bad as to end a friendship or something

Suddenly, he tells one of my other friends 'something bad happened'. He also messages me this day but I am not available at the time. He then repeats same thing next day but I Just happen to not be online. In the last message he says he doesn't want to play online games for awhile. He then disappears offline for 2 months straight, ignoring my/all our friends messages.

This causes me anxiety (worried about him as he lost his job and had to move back home since COVID), and I generally check to see if he is online every other day to see if he is online.

I then boot up a game and see through an in-game friends list that he has been playing games. I don't know if he is just pissed at us, depressed, etc.

So I message the dude on facebook after 2 months and he ignores my message. What should I do at this point?

1) Just move on with this situation and try to see what happens in the future? Honestly, this is the most mature response but I'm an obsessive person and repeatedly check to see if he is online. He is an important friend to me, but I also already have a stressful life as a part-time nurse and med student

2) Keep messaging Lol

3) Just move on completely and cut-off contact. I feel like this is a bit harsh but I also feel like it's kind of fucked up to just ghost people for 2+ months straight and ignore their messages

I say #1. He is ignoring you for whatever reason, so don't do #2. I almost never do #3 to people because you never know what is going on in someone else's life, so I leave the door open for forgiveness

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bsp77 posted...

I say #1. He is ignoring you for whatever reason, so don't do #2. I almost never do #3 to people because you never know what is going on in someone else's life, so I leave the door open for forgiveness

I feel like this is the rationale decision, but Idk i feel like ignoring someone for 2 months is fucked up. I wouldnt do that to someone, ever, and i've gone through harsher shit than anyone else I know. I'm pissed.

Maybe I'm just being too self-centered, I worry

Winrawr posted...

I feel like this is the rationale decision, but Idk i feel like ignoring someone for 2 months is fucked up. I wouldnt do that to someone, ever, and i've gone through harsher shit than anyone else I know. I'm pissed.

Maybe I'm just being too self-centered, I worry

Well, #1 and #3 is the exact same in terms of what you do. #1 is simply less vindictive and shows you are an empathetic person by letting him possibly fix things in the future

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In between 1 and 2. Send him a message explaining why you missed his messages and weren't able to reply promptly. Apologize and say you didn't mean any disrespect and tell him you're free to talk whenever he wants to reach out. Then you move on until he reaches out.

What. Maybe he just doesn't want to talk at the moment. If you're friends that should be okay. He will probably come back or he might never.

I'd say option 1. Or option 3. You don't need to ignore him if he comes back but let him do his own thing for the time being.

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