Current Events > I saw my husband cry for the first time ever last night

(+) Yeah! (+)

He had a bit to drink, but wasnt drunk. He just talked about our baby girl, how perfect she was, all the things he wanted to teach her. Then got super emotional and started talking about how he hopes he can learn to be more empathetic and he knows hes bad at it. How he worries he wont know how to handle her emotionally but wants to get better at it for her sake. Thats when he started tearing up. I havent seen him cry in our 10 years together.

Then he apologized to me for how he acted throughout my pregnancy and how he just shut me out. He said he shuts down when Im in pain and he cant help, and that he wishes he was better about it. Said he felt really bad about the whole thing and wants to work on it so he can be better to our daughter too. That his childhood was so messed up, he never really got to feel his emotions because it was all about survival and caring for his little brothers.

He went all out for Mothers Day and our anniversary. Said he wanted me to enjoy both separately so he got me cards for each, pink roses yesterday and red roses today, dinner reservations both nights and also got me diamond stud earrings. Studs so our baby wont be able to reach and pull on them lol. But honestly his apology was the most meaningful to me.

I really hope his love for our daughter will be what finally pushes him to be more in tune with his emotions.

Cleo_II posted...

I really hope his love for our daughter will be what finally pushes him to be more in tune with his emotions.

sounds like it was the alcohol that made him more in tune with his emotions

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He might need therapy. I don't mean that as any kind of knock

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So when are you divorcing him?

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CalypsoDoom posted...

He should've been better for your sake, but I definitely hope having a kiddo pushes him in the right direction. Therapy helps too.

Agreed. I do want him to go to therapy and I plan on nudging him that way. I think him acknowledging the issue is a huge step in the right direction. He normally just ignores everything. But I think now that shes in our lives and he wants to be a good dad, he knows he has to change.

Aww that's really sweet - it really is amazing the things that parenthood pushes on a person (and their willingness to act on them).

Sounds like he had a bit of an emotional breakthrough. Good to hear!

and congrats again, on the baby :)

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It sounds like he had a breakthrough
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Given the state of masculinity in the world, I think a good way to know if you've found your person is if they're willing to cry in front of you.

I mean, you've known forever, of course, but I think this is the kind of thing that allows for a much deeper emotional understanding and the capacity for support.

Like, he's broken down a very deep and powerful barrier in his psyche for you and your daughter's sake.

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That wall made me cry.

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