Current Events > Today would have been my late gf's 21st birthday...

(+) Yeah! (+)

These past two months have been rough, and this week isnt getting any better with her celebration of life this Saturday.


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My condolences, dude :/

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I'm sorry TC :/
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Thanks for the condolences.

Half hour into my work shift and Im already done. tbf tho, I was done with it for the semester 2 months ago so I guess not much has changed attitude wise.
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What happened?

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I'm sorry, man.

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Middle hope posted...

What happened?

She came down with the disease from the book/movie Brain on Fire and after almost 3 weeks in the hospital, had a massive stroke that left her brain dead.
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At the celebration now, weirdly enough I dont feel like celebrating.
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Shit I wouldn't feel like celebrating either. That sucks man.

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I'm so sorry, TC. My condolences and it's completely normal to not feel like celebrating. I know I wouldn't want to either.

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Hope you heal proper. Take care dude

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and now were at the picture slideshow part and its too much at times

its also weird kind of that random family members of her that I never met are like oh youre x? Im her aunt, nice to meet you. or whatever their title is and Im just like uh....nice to meet you >_>.

But thanks for the condolences guys.
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I'm sorry for your loss. Stay strong man!

They had a couple prints of pictures she drew and I took a couple and Im gonna get one of them tattood on me this summer. Also had a couple of her old beanies and I took one so I could always have that smell and whatnot. She also did a painting with a message on it for me that her mom gave me.
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Mine died 6 years ago today.
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blablablax17 posted...

Mine died 6 years ago today.

Damn. Sorry for your loss. Know the feel.
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My condolences to both of you.

sktgamer_13dude posted...

She came down with the disease from the book/movie Brain on Fire and after almost 3 weeks in the hospital, had a massive stroke that left her brain dead.

That's just fucking awful... What the hell? Sorry man

Gosh, sorry.

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https://www.npr.org/2012/11/14/165115921/a-young-reporter-chronicles-her-brain-on-fire

I hadnt heard of the movie so I had to look it up. Fucking hell man, Im sorry

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Rathinor posted...

That's just fucking awful... What the hell? Sorry man

lww99 posted...

https://www.npr.org/2012/11/14/165115921/a-young-reporter-chronicles-her-brain-on-fire

I hadnt heard of the movie so I had to look it up. Fucking hell man, Im sorry

Yeah it was pretty surreal. Pretty sure they put her in a psych ward for a day or two until they were able to come up with the diagnosis. And they didnt come up with one until over a week in the hospital.

The day she had the stroke was the same day I was gonna try and Zoom talk to her for the first time while she was in the hospital.
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Damn. How old are you? Like, aren't you my age and in the "looking for someone to settle down with" phase of life? :<

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shockthemonkey posted...

Dude that topic was one of the most painful things Ive ever gone through and thats just as a third party. Im so sorry that you went through that, and that she went through that without making it through, and that her family who raised an amazing young women had to lose her. You have every sympathy I have, and Im proud of you for every ounce of strengths youve been able to muster since then. Life aint fucking fair.

Thanks man. I really appreciate the kind words, even though you never knew her or anything like that. I will say it was really great to see the amount of people who were there because shes touched so many.

gunplagirl posted...

Damn. How old are you? Like, aren't you my age and in the "looking for someone to settle down with" phase of life? :<

Yeah Im 28 going on 29 this year. Obviously it was really early in our relationship to talk about that kind of stuff, but unless something severely had changed, we were probably going to settle down. We agreed on so much and literally the only fights we ever had was her being sad that we had to be in secret cause of our work relationship, but she understood my why and we were pushing up the timeline for when we were gonna come out because of it.
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Oh, and if any of you are into tragedy porn or just want to say oh I just got something in my eye, this is the thing she made for me that her mom gave me on Saturday.

https://i.imgur.com/qaJmqP0.jpg

Literally cant even think about it without tearing up a little.
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Fuck man, I'm so sorry

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sktgamer_13dude posted...

Oh, and if any of you are into tragedy porn or just want to say oh I just got something in my eye, this is the thing she made for me that her mom gave me on Saturday.

https://i.imgur.com/qaJmqP0.jpg

Literally cant even think about it without tearing up a little.

She truly, deeply, madly was in love with you. I'm not even sure anything I could say would even mean anything to you but... Just, consider therapy after the current wave of pain subsides. Because you'll be haunted by so much guilt, grief, and what if scenarios. And there's no use trying to go it alone. Because you're not left here alone. You've got friends, family, and her family. Stay in touch with them. You'll want them to help you remember and they'll want you to help them remember.

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gunplagirl posted...

She truly, deeply, madly was in love with you. I'm not even sure anything I could say would even mean anything to you but... Just, consider therapy after the current wave of pain subsides. Because you'll be haunted by so much guilt, grief, and what if scenarios. And there's no use trying to go it alone. Because you're not left here alone. You've got friends, family, and her family. Stay in touch with them. You'll want them to help you remember and they'll want you to help them remember.

Yeah I told her mom that if she ever needed anything from me or if the family did, to let me know. Literally anything.

And yeah, my mom also suggested therapy. idk, I might eventually. Ive gotten better at talking about things that I was previously super quiet about and more confirming things to friends, because only a small handful of people knew that we were getting to that level, even smaller amount got confirmed that we were dating while she was alive. Thats the only thing that truly, truly eats me up. Like yeah, Im sure my boss can read between the lines with how I reacted, but like, I never confirmed anything to her or most of my coworkers. I kind of wonder what they think, but thats neither here nor there.

But I do thank all of you for your kind words. It really does mean a lot.
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Have you had your SHIIIIZAAAAAAAA moment with her yet? Where you just break down and let it out?

Whenever that happens, feel free to message me. Because I'll have some kind words then that won't make sense until that time.

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sktgamer_13dude posted...

Oh, and if any of you are into tragedy porn or just want to say oh I just got something in my eye, this is the thing she made for me that her mom gave me on Saturday.

https://i.imgur.com/qaJmqP0.jpg

Literally cant even think about it without tearing up a little.

wow thats amazing. Where did she buy this from as Id love to get my wife this.

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gunplagirl posted...

Have you had your SHIIIIZAAAAAAAA moment with her yet? Where you just break down and let it out?

Whenever that happens, feel free to message me. Because I'll have some kind words then that won't make sense until that time.

Almost every day tbh. Its gotten better as times gone on, but theres definitely one part of everyday where Ill think of something that reminds me of her and itll just flood with emotion. Last week definitely brought me back to square one with my mood though. Her birthday + her wake was almost too much to handle in one week.

Cero_Miedo posted...

wow thats amazing. Where did she buy this from as Id love to get my wife this.

99.9% sure she made it. When? Im not sure, but my guess would either be during the Thanksgiving holidays or during the Christmas holidays, but she was home longer for Thanksgiving so my guess is it was made then. Plus, we became official (but if consider us dating before then) right before she left to go home for that break, so thats another reason why Id guess then.
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