Current Events > The Onion with another winner

(+) Yeah! (+)

https://www.theonion.com/conservative-christian-deeply-offended-at-rap-video-s-i-1846583100

Conservative Christian Deeply Offended At Rap Videos Implication That Satan A Homosexual

YORKVILLE, ILDecrying the depiction as sacrilege, local conservative Christian Elizabeth Dillon told reporters Tuesday she was deeply offended by a music video from rap artist Lil Nas X that implied Satan was a homosexual. Nowhere in the Bible does Satan receive a lap dance, least of all from another man, said Dillon, who was just one of thousands of worshippers across the country outraged by the depiction of the fallen angel as anything other than a devout Christian. Satan embraces sin, but not that sin. He has a wife, you know, and three young demonic children. And sure, he tempted Christ, but never in a sexual way. Satan simply couldnt be any straighter. At press time, a horrified Dillon had realized that Satan was bisexual.

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lol, this is great too

https://www.theonion.com/chauvin-defense-team-attempts-to-demonize-george-floyd-1846593075

Chauvin Defense Team Attempts To Demonize George Floyd By Tying Him To High-Profile 2020 Murder

MINNEAPOLISIn an effort to build a case supporting their clients exoneration, the defense team of Minneapolis police officer Derek Chauvin reportedly attempted to demonize the late George Floyd Wednesday by tying him to a high-profile 2020 murder. To convict Officer Chauvin on these charges is to blatantly ignore Mr. Floyds questionable past, including his very presence at the scene of a brutal murder on May 25, 2020, said Eric Nelson, Chauvins attorney, informing the judge that he had video evidence suggesting that Floyd had even played a role in the brutal slaying of a defenseless man. We would be remiss if we didnt question why Mr. Floyd was present at a murder. We simply want to present the evidence demonstrating Mr. Floyds clear ties to a senseless killing and let the jury draw their own conclusions. Furthermore, we cannot ignore the fact that for nearly a year, Mr. Floyds name has been synonymous with murder, and we just need to state for the record that this raises some potentially disturbing questions about his character. Chauvins defense team additionally attempted to demonize Floyd by questioning the company he kept, submitting video evidence that on the day of the murder witness testimony he had been consorting with known murderer Derek Chauvin.

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Has the Onion transitioned from satire to real news yet? Would be hard to notice a difference.

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YourLovelyTina posted...

lol, this is great too

https://www.theonion.com/chauvin-defense-team-attempts-to-demonize-george-floyd-1846593075

Chauvin Defense Team Attempts To Demonize George Floyd By Tying Him To High-Profile 2020 Murder

rofl
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