Current Events > Im 34 years old and never been on a date

(+) Yeah! (+)

Am I a lost cause how do you think woman would react if I told them?

Depends on the woman. But you don't really need to tell them. if they like you it shouldn't matter. if it matters then they don't really like you.

---

they would think it's adorable

---

then your screen name should probably be DateOfDoom

---

Beefbud posted...

then your screen name should probably be DateOfDoom

Lol you right

seriously tho while it might be surprising to some people, i hope it doesn't inhibit you from trying to go on a date. definitely not a lost cause

---

you could find a 34 year old awkward girl who's neve rbeen on a date

---

At this point, you might as well stick to 2D.

---

this will be me in 7 years

Same situation here.

---

It's fine. You'll be fine.


---

Dinner and a movie is a classic for a first date, you should try it some time.

---

Its becoming more and more common actually. And in time may eventually become a norm like it is in Japan nowadays.

---

Could be worse, you could be Vegy.
Then again TC is probably a Vegy alt.

Prismsblade posted...

Its becoming more and more common actually. And in time may eventually become a norm like it is in Japan nowadays.

Women will just shift further to only giving the time of day to the top percentage of men

DarthAragorn posted...

Women will just shift further to only giving the time of day to the top percentage of men

The politicians gonna snatch all the ladies up.

---

DarthAragorn posted...

Women will just shift further to only giving the time of day to the top percentage of men

Every woman is different. Sure, they follow the same basic biological blueprint, but they have wildly different personalities, aspirations and wants.

---

Every journey starts with taking the first step.

---

GateOfDoom posted...

Am I a lost cause how do you think woman would react if I told them?

Depends, but if it were me, I probably wouldn't mention it until you've gotten to know each other better.

---

I personally wouldn't say anything unless they asked, and even if they do ask, try to avoid the question. Don't lie to them obviously.
---

Yeah nothing good will ever come out of being honest about this

Orlando_Jordan posted...

At this point, you might as well stick to 2D.

Do not listen to this persons advice about dating or women. Ever.

---

My brother-in-law had never been on a date when he was around 32, went on Match and went on his first date after only like a week. Married her a couple years later.

He was also the first guy his wife had ever dated (knowing her youd believe it too). They are like two peas in a pod.

Both smart (hes a lead engineer for a fortune 500, shes a top biochemist for a top pharma company). Socially awkward but nice people that were very picky due to religious aspects and similar mindsets.

Honestly, there are plenty of woman youd probably find that have a lot in common with you.

Separate story: I told this girl in college after seeing her for a week that it had been a while since Id dated or slept with anyone else. She worked with my roommates girlfriend and we hooked up after getting drink at my place when having a party. I impressed the hell out of her (legit best performance of my life, ngl). Ghosted me after telling her I hadnt slept with anyone else in 2 yrs. Best one-week stand of my life. I was so into her I pulled a private message novel to her saying we had a connection, she replied she wasnt good enough for me and shes a mess. That was it.

I had thought girls liked it when you werent banging everyone in town but I think maybe she thought I was lying. Either way, the first time we hooked up we did it in the bedroom, bathroom, on the bathroom floor and counter later, and again in the bathroom where she did the bend down and touch your toes position. Id say whiskey dick but it wasnt that, I just went for like an hour.


---

Orlando_Jordan posted...

Every woman is different. Sure, they follow the same basic biological blueprint, but they have wildly different personalities, aspirations and wants.

I respect your optimism but statistically in this particular regard.....not all that much.

Which isn't really a good or bad thing though. Nature has its reasons for everything.

---

DarthAragorn posted...

Yeah nothing good will ever come out of being honest about this

He should definitely be honest about it, just not on the first couple dates
---

I probably wouldn't tell them unless you can pull it off in a charming charismatic kind of way, which seems like a long shot

---

I dont think I'll bring it up

GateOfDoom posted...

I dont think I'll bring it up

Do you have an upcoming date?

---

I had my first girlfriend at 34, and I didn't bring it up until long after we were already a couple. She kind of already knew, but didn't mind.

I never thought it was a big deal and didn't dwell on it, and in having that mindset, it wasn't a big deal to her either.

---

Lower your standards

---

Don't tell her at this early stage that you've never had a date before. Maybe tell her that you're a little rusty at this because it's been a long time since you had a date.

---

Ask someone out on a date. You'd be surprised by how easy it actually is to get one. Me and my ex gf broke up after Christmas (we were together for 6.5 years) and I ended up getting on Snap, added a bunch of people from suggested. Started working out a lot and posting to story all the time.

Just seem like you're interesting/have something going on in your life and women will comment on your story. Try talking to them after they do, and if they seem interested (you'll be able to tell if they are) ask them out on a date.

It took me basically no time at all to find a date. A girl seemed interested in me at the end of January, and just last night we had our second date. Its been nice.

Just...don't feel like you're supposed to snog or have sex on the first date though. When you ask someone out like that, its under the assumption its not just a fling.

Establishing your interest in a girl sexually/romantically from the get go is very important though. This allows you to build a friendship with her and also let's her know that you're thinking about her in that kind of way

...rather than just being the super friendly guy who never establishes his intentions that later on makes a move that will come across as creepy

---

Depends on who it is tbh. This friend from worked thought I liked her and said she wasn't ready for a relationship, but we could fwb and earlier on the day we first fucked, she asked if I had sex before and I lied multiple times and she kept asking so I finally fessed up that I was a virgin and she didn't care and we ended up hooking up after work that night. I also was too nervous to keep it up and we've still hooked up quite a times since then (with better results) so basically what I'm saying, don't worry about it and just go with the flow, you'll find someone who doesn't care what you have and haven't done and no, it's not too late, I lost my v card in Dec at 29 and I just turned 30.

---

Perascamin posted...

Ask someone out on a date. You'd be surprised by how easy it actually is to get one. Me and my ex gf broke up after Christmas (we were together for 6.5 years) and I ended up getting on Snap, added a bunch of people from suggested. Started working out a lot and posting to story all the time.

Just seem like you're interesting/have something going on in your life and women will comment on your story. Try talking to them after they do, and if they seem interested (you'll be able to tell if they are) ask them out on a date.

Wow is snap really a good place to find local people? I've been trying to find someone nice to replace my current fwb with and as someone who just started working out, Im not confident enough to put pics up for Tinder and know no other place to meet women with covid killing gatherings so you may just be a genius dude!


---

I have never gone on anything I really considered a date. But later I became aware that some of the girls considered it differently. Is asking someone if they they want to come over and watch a movie and you cook em dinner a date?

Generally I just hang out with girls and we go do stuff if we feel like it. Whatever happens afterwards happens.

One reason I have never used any of these dating apps, it specifies shit too much. People have expectations and get ideas.

---

Don't tell a potential partner this. You don't have to disclose everything about your life.

---

smoke_break posted...

Don't tell a potential partner this. You don't have to disclose everything about your life.

It will get reasoned out eventually though unless you craft a whole fake story about previous relationships. Past relationships/ex talk likely happens at some point and having zero stories will pretty much out you.

I agree that it doesn't have to be the first thing you tell people though. No obligation to put your private life out there to that extent. And if it's like a brief fling or something that ends somewhat quickly then it's possible you can get through the whole thing without ever telling them. But anything longer/more serious then yeah you're either going to have to lie (which would be super hard to maintain) or come clean.

if you really wanna go than lower your standards. no idea how you look but go on a dating site or something and just ask out some girl you don't even find attractive.

creativeme posted...

if you really wanna go than lower your standards. no idea how you look but go on a dating site or something and just ask out some girl you don't even find attractive.

I agree with this.

Unless you are exceptionally talented socially or happen to say and do all the right things by dumb luck; you will screw up the first several dates, possible badly It's OK, it's just part of the learning process which usually only comes with direct experience. May as well blow it on a girls that aren't your dream girl.

My first date was over in 5 minutes because she got creeped out. I was soul-crushed because I felt like I couldn't do better; but I pressed on and tried again. Second one sucked, but I did talk for 2 hours. I screwed up by being scared to touch her. (Hand/shoulder, nothing aggressive right away) The third time kinda sucked too but it was a lot better than the last attempt...and I actually managed to pull a second date which was a first.

It only got better from there and by this point if it doesn't last it's because we weren't as compatible as we thought.

smoke_break posted...

Don't tell a potential partner this. You don't have to disclose everything about your life.

---

Elmdor043 posted...

Wow is snap really a good place to find local people? I've been trying to find someone nice to replace my current fwb with and as someone who just started working out, Im not confident enough to put pics up for Tinder and know no other place to meet women with covid killing gatherings so you may just be a genius dude!

Its worked very well for me. Women spend pretty much ALL their time on snap/insta. My town has a population of 14,500 and I made 4 new friends within 2 weeks of posting to story a lot

---

Glad to see I'm not the only one

I'd love to go on a date at some point...

---

Not a lost cause. But you actually have to ask and try to date woman. Otherwise the years will continue to add on.

---

even if you lie about it, they will notice something.

Today is the year you'll go on a date and find someone. Work on yourself and ask women out (:

---

gameover119 posted...

Not a lost cause. But you actually have to ask and try to date woman. Otherwise the years will continue to add on.

I can't imagine outside of apps where that is the explicit reason they are there how you could ask somebody out without risking making them uncomfortable.

---

gameover119 posted...

Not a lost cause. But you actually have to ask and try to date woman. Otherwise the years will continue to add on.

You're right