Current Events > CE Confessionary - Lay out your sins. The good, the bad and the lewd

(+) Yeah! (+)

RULES:
- Follow gamefaqs.gamespot.com TOS
- Remember to recite your prayers to our celord and savior, error1355

If I feel you have broken any of TOS rules, only you and I will know the truth. I have sole discretion over what is posted. Even if you don't technically break the rules above, if I sense that you are saying something to cause arguments it won't be posted :)

Now, let's have some fun. I'll be responding to everyone's confessions if they make it past my audit. And yes, this is completely anonymous.

https://forms.gle/wLUDq5FJcAuEJRcF8

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Ma Keys!!!
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Is a confessionary anything like a nunnery?

Nah nah, I wont be forgiving you for your sins

(Reddit sexting guy) eh, I've considered choking the chicken at work but I am scared of getting caught. Plus I tend to be kinda tired once I finish and I feel like it'd be obvious. Gonna have to wait

Ugh, prude

Hi Dr. Harpie. This morning I shit my pants while making love to my wife so I quickly pulled out of her construction zone and jammed it in her sewage treatment plant to balance it out. I was in such a hurry when I told her to wait outside in 13 degree weather without her pants while I dealt with the small fire I had to start to cause us to evacuate while I scrambled to set things straight. Am I a bad person or did I just care too much about our love?

what the fuck is goin on here

It seems Mama Merkel is looking out for me my studentbux are now a few months overdue, and they are the funds that I would have used to buy cyberpunk. Guess someone in the German government knew how buggy the launch would be

A few MONTHS??
ew
Go get cyberpunk boi

Remember your mom pimped you out for drugs

yeah

Why does ssj3vegeta not love me?

youre not a cute cegal

People offsite are saying horrible things about me and I feel myself spiraling back to where I was mentally

:(
I wish I could give you a hug

Id say to stop looking, but its hard not to when you KNOW theyre talking about you. Remember at least that they are nobodies who dont know the real you. Theyre shitting on you because its easy and it makes them feel better. You are BEAUTIFUL and VALID and INTELLIGENT

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"I think my neighbor is abusing his children. He's always screaming really nastily at his dogs and sometimes even literally kicking them (it makes my blood boil hearing them cry and squeal), but a while ago his (10ish-year-old) daughter wandered up and talked to me a little. I wasn't really paying attention, but she said something about the basement of their house not being fully finished yet and how she hates being locked in it on nights when she's ""naughty"" and having to sleep on the cold concrete. I wasn't sure what to do, so I called up an old teacher who's now the principal of the school the kid attends hoping that she could advise me further. She gave me the weirdest answer about how their parents are well-respected, well-liked, generous folks who contribute to the school and oh, you'd be surprised at kids' over-active imaginations. She intimated that that child in particular had a habit of ""telling stories"" and basically thanked me for my concern but told me it wasn't something I need to worry about. What do I do now?"

Wow. I would contact CPS, but tbh its unlikely anything will get done. If an event occurs in the future though, the fact that CPS was called will show up and help the kids prove theyre telling the trust. Id say call, just in case it helps. Its anonymous too. At the very least, if you can, be there for the kids. Be friendly and comforting. Its the least you can do since they likely dont get it at home :/

ngl been thinking about [death] in this weirdly objective way where it just seems like the logical next step instead of an out from depression or whatever. less that i want to die and more that [it] ain't all that, y'know

I get it. Dont you fuckin dare, but I get it. Its moreso an indifference to being alive or not

I have fantasized about you many, many times. I would literally take a plane ride to wherever you live so we could be together.

wow
whatcha waiting for??

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SiO4 posted...

Ma Keys!!!

no, MY keys

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Its time to get toasty. But how toasty?

Lil toast
Moderate toast
Floating in the clouds toast

someone choose for me

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Harpie posted...

no, MY keys

The Grammer police. Nice capitalization work there, dude.

Harpie posted...

Floating in the clouds toast

Legit Sim flight 2020 is like that. It's amazing!
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SiO4 posted...

The Grammer police. Nice capitalization work there, dude.

Legit Sim flight 2020 is like that. It's amazing!

No no, I meant theyre MY keys. Give them back

is it on steam

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Where do I send money to get more thigh high pics?

I would say pm me but then the mods would titty slap me ._.

I've been playing the SNES version of Dr. Mario a lot lately and I'm trying to stop because I get ridiculously pissed when I lose to the cheap CPU. But then I keep coming back anyway :(

Dr Mario is fuckin ridiculously hard so dont feel too bad about being beat out by a 20 year old cpu

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Harpie posted...

No no, I meant theyre MY keys. Give them back

is it on steam

Ya, it is. But it is a huge freaking download.
I've been meaning to make a topic about it.
But I haven't for a number of reasons.

Those aside...I finally found the screen shot folder, so YA! it might be game on!
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SiO4 posted...

Ya, it is. But it is a huge freaking download.
I've been meaning to make a topic about it.
But I haven't for a number of reasons.

Those aside...I finally found the screen shot folder, so YA! it might be game on!

When you make the topic, tag me. I wanna see your official review with screenshots

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God I wish I could show all of the confessions. There are some really great ones but theyd get me warned in about 2 minutes flat

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Harpie posted...

God I wish I could show all of the confessions. There are some really great ones but theyd get me warned in about 2 minutes flat

Separate Google doc maybe?

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Wii_Shaker posted...

Separate Google doc maybe?

But where could I post it

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Harpie + Aeriis is my dream CEgal threesome

yeah Id do it

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You know what?
This is it.
This is the topic.
This is the confessionary topic that makes it to 500!
Oh yes

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Harpie posted...

When you make the topic, tag me. I wanna see your official review with screenshots

Oh, I will if you want.

Here's one pic. And ya you can really fly around in the clouds.
The whole thing is really crazy and ambitious.

https://imgur.com/DLsGC66
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Harpie posted...

A few MONTHS??
ew
Go get cyberpunk boi

I will once the money comes in lol
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Harpie posted...

yeah Id do it

There is a clone of myself posting on this board apparently because that's what I would've put

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I also like aeriis, will u forgive me?

i dont even play games anymore i just grind gacha, it's so peaceful and relaxing
grind gacha grind gacha grind gacha

Gacha gacha GACHA
whats gacha

I want a dozen donuts. 4 chocolate...2 Boston kreme...wait...did you say confessionary or confectionary?

I can make you some donuts but I cant guarantee that theyll actually be good so

I've had dozens of accounts on CE, each with elaborate phony background stories and distinct personas. It started out as a writing exercise to help me individualize characters in a believable way but it really spiraled out of control, probably to the point of mental illness, and I'm not exaggerating. I'd start to think as these people away from gamefaqs. I read extensively about all kinds of professions, hobbies, and places to get more than surface level understanding of things to keep up appearances without getting caught if someone questioned me about my BS, which did happen a few times.

Most of them were nobodies that got no attention but a few of them got somewhat popular, to the point that I staged an argument and had other actual CEmen ardently taking sides.

I made some pretty good friends over the years and even visited one CEmen under the guise of a fake persona.

I finally called it quits when I posted about a hardship one of the fake accounts was experiencing and someone offered to help me financially. I never intended to defraud or exploit anyone and the offer made me realize that I was getting off on playing with real people.

I deliberated about coming clean to people but I couldn't bear to, deciding instead to ghost people, including the person I visited. These were people I talked to nearly every day, who trusted and confided in me and I just vanished. I still see some of them around and want to fess up but I think that would be unfair to them as I imagine it would be embarrassing. My catharsis isn't worth messing with someone in that way.

I also worry that I could slip back into that because it was seriously exhilarating in a way that I'm quite ashamed of. I tried to make an account recently but for some reason it was set to read only, which is probably for the best.

I can kinda get what youre going through. When I was 13ish, I make an account on gamefaqs with a completely fake persona. Its fun til its not. I ended up deleting the account because I, like you, realized how manipulative and gross it was.
Try to remember who youre doing that for, when you feel the urge. Is it for self gratification? Attention? There are better ways to get it. Tbh Im proud of you for stopping when you did.

I think Homer gets stupider every year

How is that possible hes decades old

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teepan95 posted...

I will once the money comes in lol

Lemme know boi, I wanna see your review

WallStreetWolf posted...

There is a clone of myself posting on this board apparently because that's what I would've put

Ah, I see. A man of good taste

DB_Insider posted...

I also like aeriis, will u forgive me?

Yes yes, shes a qt

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Whos the third

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Tag

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Harpie posted...

Lemme know boi, I wanna see your review

I already know it's gonna be a Harpie/10

Interpret that however you want :P
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I dont really like my job. Sure, the benefits and pay are pretty good, but I feel like I'm more qualified for other things. However a job is a job. One of the main reasons I dont find another one is that I'm crushing on one of my female managers pretty hard. I also thinks she knows.

If she knows, has she given any signs of reciprocating??

Hi, Ive lurked here for years, a Ghost of CEshima, and I just wanted to ask if you could fart in my face.

Yes, but itll cost ya $15 a toot

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I like this Puppetmaster dude who posts in most of these confession topics
nobody cares about your brilliant manipulations
you're pixels on a screen
get over yourself

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Harpie posted...

whats gacha

It's basically loot boxes, typically in the context of Japanese games with many unlockable characters only available through said loot boxes.

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Eevee-Trainer posted...

Tag

thanks bby
To 500!

teepan95 posted...

I already know it's gonna be a Harpie/10

Interpret that however you want :P

Underwhelming and overrated?

Simp posted...

I like this Puppetmaster dude who posts in most of these confession topics
nobody cares about your brilliant manipulations
you're pixels on a screen
get over yourself

Nonono you dont understand, its an FBI level heist. It takes a lot of work to troll a community board 12 hours a day

WilliamPorygon posted...

It's basically loot boxes, typically in the context of Japanese games with many unlockable characters only available through said loot boxes.

Ohhhh
Yeah I can see why youd grind

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One time I made out with my-- you know what, never mind. <_<

Harpie posted...

Underwhelming and overrated?

Only I'm allowed to have the self-hating gimmick, smh
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Make a discord where CE can go all out and you post dem dere
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PM me the good ones you can't post

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I've been pretending to be a stereotypical SJW on a fairly prominent left wing gaming forum (you already know which). In truth I'm a very right wing white male and me and many of my friends want to cause chaos because, we feel these left wing [liberals] are the [disease] killing America. You'd be surprised how many of the biggest SJW [liberals] are actually hardcore Trump supporters.
Second confession; we purposely go to Reddit and gaming forums and stir up controversy to push our agenda. Gamers eat the controversy up. Gamers make the best allies because they're easily pushed. Just say anything regarding Women, Blacks or Non-Heterosexual relations and you'll find lots of support. It's so braindead easy. The number of left-wing [liberal] people outside small circles is increasingly small.
Third confession; we don't have Non-straight white males. We never had an issue with them. That's a blatant lie you people have accused us over. [more garbage]

okay

DSPgaming is the best streamer of all time. I've donated upwards of over $1000 to him. Most the controversy and hatred towards him is well overblown by jealous haters.

Why donate tho

I sometimes fantasize about gamefaqs closing down

Luckily for you, its inevitable ._.

I'm a huuuuuge foot fetishist but I have no idea how to bring it up to romantic/sexual partners.
Also, I hate how so many of us are creeps about it, both online and irl

Just open up the conversation by asking about kinks and sexual preferences. If you have an open dialogue and youre both mature adults, I doubt that your partner would react strongly about it. Aint nothin wrong with liking feet.
Tbh, I think foot fetishists get a bad rap. Other creeps that are into normal kinks arent seen as disgusting as a foot fetish.

I got 10 (up for parole in 5. I got lucky) years in a State Pen for smuggling drugs across state lines. It wasn't my first offense. My friend ratted me out. My confession: I have PTSD from my days in prison. It was hell. between the violence and the murders. Saw CO's beat a man to death for talking shit. Saw multiple murders and fights daily. I did things I'd rather not say . But to survive in Prison you have to be tough. Shot Caller comes up to me "hey anon ya been here a bit. Time to put in work". Can't refuse, can't say no or else you're the one getting shanked.
My whole life is ruined btw. I work a very stressful manual labor job for pennies. if I make one mistake I'm going back to prison. My family and friends have all disowned me. I put on a strong front but, deep down I'm fucking terrified and lonely. I do 12-14 hour days, go back to my half way home and do it again. I don't have days off. As I said one mistake and you're fucked. I have to go all the way across city to meet my PO and if I'm late or miss it I'm going back. It's so insanely fucked up.

Damn, Im sorry man. Thats honestly fuckin awful. Youre strong though, you can make it past this. How long til your parole is up?

People genuinely think I've created an echo chamber with the number of people I've blocked. I say it's a matter of choosing to not surround myself with negativity.

Theyre just upset that youve decided to ignore all the bullshit unlike them lol. Im with you

Someone on here has actively tried to drive me to [do bad things] and other people around him are totally ok with it. Call me naive, but I wasn't aware that it was this acceptable to bully someone just because you don't find them sexually attractive.

It isnt acceptable, but people dont do acceptable things when they get to hide behind a monitor. The internet is one of the most concentrated, toxic environments you could surround yourself with :/

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Harpie posted...

Theyre just upset that youve decided to ignore all the bulls*** unlike them lol. Im with you

Yeah, people have this weird superiority complex about being willing to sift through the toxicity on this board.

Imagine being unashamedly proud of literally wasting your time.

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^Who posted?

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