Current Events > I woke up one morning as the POTUS

(+) Yeah! (+)

I remember thinking this cant be right, someone must have made a mistake
But 3 wise men came in and told me its true
I thought alright, if you want me to.
Can I get fries with that?

The 1st order of the day was to play croquet with the Secretary of Defense
He beat me fair and square but luckily for me, I bet on him and made 53 cents
When I went back to the oval office he made a whole big event
Saying tomorrow Ill show you it wasnt an accident
That wont happen though, cause I fired him!

The Minister of Interpersonal Relations came in and said to me, man, you gotta make a plan for the environment
I said, Al Gore lost, you dummy, dont you read the news? The environment took some PTO and took a cruise.
63 different beaches in Italy

I decided it was time to get some real work done,
Real work thatd benefit me, my son, his son...THE Sun.
I thought what does the average, every day citizen need?
I stroked my beard and tugged at my sleeves
Then it came to me

So I passed Executive Order #117, very clean,
That gives every American a brand new shirt-folding machine
It can fold every color you like: red, white, bright or night; it wont teach you how to do it though
But if I ever accidentally become president again,
You can bet your ma Ill get it done then
Wrinkle-less shirts will save the day

The Lakers coach calls me up that night and says
Hey, would you let us know what time is alright?
I said time for what? I have no idea what you mean
He said those plans we made on the 14th
I thought, okay, I guess it wont be so bad,
Then these basketball players showed up
I thought we were going fishing!

The next day I awoke and went to get a Coke, and realized I was no longer in the White House
Thank God, I thought, it was just a crazy dream
What the hell did any of that mean?
Then I looked at the business cards in my wallet with shock
President of the OTHER United States

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