Current Events > This girl texted me saying she wants to die and is pleading for my help. What do

(+) Yeah! (+)

I made a topic about this girl in November 2019. At that time, she was telling me that she would call the local police if I didn't respond to her texts. I've known this girl since September 2018. I was her chemistry tutor at our university. After the semester ended, she wanted to be friends and I was okay with it. She admitted to finding me attractive but she had a boyfriend so it was all good. As time passed, I learned she had a rough life. Abusive father, mother going in and out of mental hospitals for constantly threatening suicide, suicidal sister, says she was raped by her boyfriend at the time, etc. In 2019, she had been making bad decisions such as becoming an alcoholic and lying to her family about getting into nursing school. I tried to tell her that she wasn't making good decisions and as her friend, I didn't want to see her suffer. She would argue with me and tell me to keep my thoughts to myself. That my only purpose was to listen to her vent and nothing more. When I distanced myself, that's when she started talking about calling the police on me and she would spam my phone with calls. So, I blocked her.

Fast forward to this month, I had this strange feeling about her so I unblocked her to see what would happen. Sure enough, the very next day at 1 am, I get two text messages from her. One was a "Hey" as if she was testing to see if she was still blocked. The next was a huge paragraph about how sorry she was and how her life became worse. She talked about wanting to die. Saying no one will miss her when she's gone. All of her friends abandoned her. One of her family members was murdered. She says that she needs my help since I'm one of the only people she knows who has been through a great deal and turned out fine. I responded by telling her how I'm sorry to hear about her situation and that her life is important. That kind of stuff.

Haven't talked to her since. Not sure if I should see how she's doing or just stay as far away as possible. This girl is a lot to deal with. She started to take medication back in November when I blocked her but I don't know if she's still taking her meds. I also don't know if she's still with her current boyfriend. If she is, why even come to me for help? I'd rather not be involved considering what happened when I tried to help her last time but I don't want to learn one day that she actually ended up taking her own life. Then, I'd feel guilt.

Not sure what to do here. I got monkey pawed, though. I used to make all these topics years ago about not having a 6 foot blonde girl being attracted to me. Then, a 6 foot blonde girl finds me attractive but she turns out to be like this. What the hell, man. For the record, I have no desire to get with her and never had one. I only wanted to remain friends.

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Thats why I never unblock anyone

Go back in time and unknow her.

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Run away

Monolith1676 posted...

Go back in time and unknow her.

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That's gonna be a big oof yikes from me, dawg

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Umm.

No.

They threaten to call the cops on you, you don't start engaging them again.


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Part of the pain of getting older is realizing you cant save everyone you care about. No matter what you do, you have to sit there and watch them self destruct.

You should stay away for your own sake, you arent ready for that level. Shes already reeling you in, bombarding you with her sob story. Its not worth it and as a friend she has nothing to offer you.

Well, I guess unless you are independently wealthy and really bored.

Then go for it.

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Interesting points everyone have brought up. I want to leave this alone and move on. Im doing well enough at this point, barring the current pandemic, and Id rather not have some girl drag me down into the rabbit hole again.

I dont mind helping people but that last experience with her left a bad taste.

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Stay away.

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Call a professional up to help her.

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Hairistotle posted...

reblock. no contact. ever again. not your responsibility; this person will wear you down to the point of you wanting to die

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How would she know you unblocked her? Or do you think it was just coincidental that she messaged and saw or she has been doing it on the daily?

Just block her problem solved

BLOCK and move on
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She needs help. I'm just not sure what kind of help

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You can't fix crazy, you can only cover it up slightly and maybe try to delay the meltdowns. If you try, you're going to be in for a bad time. You need to look out for yourself and not let her drag you down with her situation, because trust me, it won't ever get better.

You should take the threat of suicide seriously, while knowing that for most people it's an empty/attention seeking sentiment. The likelihood that someone is going to kill themselves because you won't talk to them is very small, especially since you aren't her boyfriend or family. It's going to come out again and again every time you pull away, and even though it sounds fucked up, after a certain point you need to just call their bluff and they'll find someone else to deal with their shit.

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Do you know enough information about her to make a report for a welfare check? If so, you should do so. As PP noted, she needs professional help.

Do not engage with her any more.

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Tryhaptaward posted...

How would she know you unblocked her? Or do you think it was just coincidental that she messaged and saw or she has been doing it on the daily?

She must have been testing it every now and then. Constantly hoping to get into contact with me.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


It is pretty harsh. She's not a horrible person. She just has a lot of issues that she needs professional help with.

Ultima Dragon posted...

You can't fix crazy, you can only cover it up slightly and maybe try to delay the meltdowns. If you try, you're going to be in for a bad time. You need to look out for yourself and not let her drag you down with her situation, because trust me, it won't ever get better.

You should take the threat of suicide seriously, while knowing that for most people it's an empty/attention seeking sentiment. The likelihood that someone is going to kill themselves because you won't talk to them is very small, especially since you aren't her boyfriend or family. It's going to come out again and again every time you pull away, and even though it sounds fucked up, after a certain point you need to just call their bluff and they'll find someone else to deal with their shit.

Yes, this was the first time she ever talked about wanting to commit suicide to me. If she talked about it often, I may have not even responded. Suicide threats should always be taken seriously but at some point, the person making those threats needs to seek help or fix whatever major issues are going on in their lives. She has many problems that she brought upon herself and she needs to realize that. I can only do so much for someone.

Sariana21 posted...

Do you know enough information about her to make a report for a welfare check? If so, you should do so. As PP noted, she needs professional help.

Do not engage with her any more.

All I know is her full name and date of birth. She still lives with her parents if I remember correctly. I could always contact our university. The counseling and wellness services are there for these types of situations. Even if she doesn't want to talk to a professional, somebody can at least call her and make sure everything is okay. It's ultimately up to her if she wants their help.

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EverDownward posted...

She needs help. I'm just not sure what kind of help

this. Dont be captain save a hoe. She needs a professional and you engaging with her might make her even more unstable. Just leave it.

also she may just be doing this for your attention and to reel you back in by being this intense. Sounds like some borderline personality work.

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Not your problem she is a broken bitch TC. She did that to herself and didn't take your advice for her well being and only has herself to blame. Some people don't learn until they hit rock bottom. Maybe she is one of those people and it's her time.

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