Current Events > Convert to Judaism. Move to Israel.

(+) Yeah! (+)

Spend less than 2 years with the IDF.
Get a lot of training, life skills, benefits post military. Bang hot israelis
Get basically free higher education and your degree at great universities. Continue banging hot israelis
come back to America

thoughts?

Converting means dedication. I don't need any of that since I was born Jewish.

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brb gonna try this

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I hear it's not so great for Ethiopian Jews over there, and I look Ethiopian, so I'd personally pass...plus idk if they'd want me to get circumcised


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how many kids do you have to murder

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NinjaBreakfast posted...

how many kids do you have to murder

you don't even have to be a combat soldier

Nah, I don't want to support that apartheid ethnostate.

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Reform Judaism doesnt require circumcision for a formal conversion btw

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but are hot Israeli chicks gonna accept my uncircumcised dick???? maybe theyd be into it??????

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Lonestar2000 posted...

Nah, I don't want to support that apartheid ethnostate.

I think there are moral ways to look at this and go about it.

Turtlebread posted...

but are hot Israeli chicks gonna accept my uncircumcised dick???? maybe theyd be into it??????

maybe

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

catholics don't circumcise i think

Lonestar2000 posted...

Nah, I don't want to support that apartheid ethnostate.

lol. Israel is the best place to be in the middle east for Jews and non Jews alike.

I am half European and half Asian so this makes sense to me

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Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

I asked my dad why I wasn't, when I was a kid, and he said it was because he believed it was messed up

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You also need to learn the language and probably kill Palestinians (sp)

Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

My dad thought it was wrong.

coh posted...

lol. Israel is the best place to be in the middle east for Jews and non Jews alike.

I'm sure the Palestinians would disagree with you.

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No I'm pretty sure he believes apartheid is the best system for Palestinians to live under

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become an israeli citizen and support equality for arabs!

Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

im catholic

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bellydancer posted...

catholics don't circumcise i think

yes. we believe circumcision of the body was replaced by the circumcision of the heart which is baptism
Romans 2:29

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Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

Many people in USA have it done for cosmetic or religious reasons.

Not everyone though. My Mom said she wasn't going to let some doctor chop pieces off of her kids for no good reason, so we're all uncut.

One of my cousins died from a botched circumcision before I was born, so that probably helped her decision. We're also not religious at all.

Another cousin, born after me, had too much taken off and is deformed for life. He had a rough time as a teenager and still won't speak to his parents.

Lonestar2000 posted... I'm sure the Palestinians would disagree with you.

Because they're totally for religious freedom, and not the least bit genocidal.

NinjaBreakfast posted...

No I'm pretty sure he believes apartheid is the best system for Palestinians to live under

They should probably stop trying to acquire weapons with the goal of eradicating people who weren't even alive 72 years ago because of their religion.

GFAQs: Arab ethnostates where gays and women aren't free, that fund terrorism against, and wish genocide upon, Jews = good. A single Jewish ethnostate with religious and sexual freedom = bad. Also being against the 1948 mandate totally made, and still make hating and killing Jews okay.

Both sides are shitty, but good job putting words in people's mouths.

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masterbarf posted...

Stuff

I'm kinda curious, if suddenly someone came into your home, and pushed you to live in a small square footage of the house to live in while they got everything else, would you be ok with it? would you be fine with sharing the small square footage of the house that you used to own and live in?

Noumas posted...

I'm kinda curious, if suddenly someone came into your home, and pushed you to live in a small square footage of the house to live in while they got everything else, would you be ok with it? would you be fine with sharing the small square footage of the house that you used to own and live in?

The 50% of Arabs that got displaced, got displaced as a result of a war they started. They may not have been okay with a people being awarded the right to move into the region, but they had no reason to hate them. Immigrants want a place to work and raise a family just like the people who already lived there. If there wasn't a festering resentment towards Jews there'd never have been a war, or a mass displacement.

Lonestar2000 posted...

Both sides are shitty, but good job putting words in people's mouths.

My last comment was not meant to be directed at those I quoted. I've just read many comments on this website literally sympathizing with wanting to kill people for being Jewish.

i don't think that's true lollllll

masterbarf posted...

The 50% of Arabs that got displaced, got displaced as a result of a war they started. They may not have been okay with a people being awarded the right to move into the region, but they had no reason to hate them. Immigrants want a place to work and raise a family just like the people who already lived there. If there wasn't a festering resentment towards Jews there'd never have been a war, or a mass displacement.

Hmm yeah, the people being invaded started the war. Nice backwards-ass thinking.

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1337toothbrush posted...

Hmm yeah, the people being invaded started the war. Nice backwards-ass thinking.

Let's see, who's more sympathetic? Widely marginalized immigrants moving somewhere they were told they could move to so they could simply live normal lives, or people who hate and murder said immigrants because of the religion they belong to?

How do people on this website, go from being against the 1948 mandate to sympathizing with wanting to kill the people the mandate sought to benefit? That's fucking nuts. But they are Jewish so people's standards and perception changing is expected.

"Invaded." Give me a break. "Oh no he's renting an apartment and working at the grocery store . . . while Jewish. How dare he. Let's start killing Jewish people."

I wonder how the Israel haters on CE can simultaneously hold the opinions that the modern-day Israelis invaded the land and also that the US should grant amnesty to illegal immigrants and possibly have open borders as well.

Anyway, converting to Judaism (at least for the purpose of moving to Israel) isn't as simple as saying you're Jewish tbh. You have to work with a rabbi to convert, and they would be able to tell if you were serious or not.
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masterbarf posted...

Let's see, who's more sympathetic? Widely marginalized immigrants moving somewhere they were told they could move to so they could simply live normal lives, or people who hate and murder said immigrants because of the religion they belong to?

How do people on this website, go from being against the 1948 mandate to sympathizing with wanting to kill the people the mandate sought to benefit? That's fucking nuts. But they are Jewish so people's standards and perception changing is expected.

"Invaded." Give me a break. "Oh no he's renting an apartment and working at the grocery store . . . while Jewish. How dare he. Let's start killing Jewish people."

They were told they could move there by warmongering, imperialist assholes in the west. Palestinians were fine living with Jews, not being kicked out of their homes.

Damn_Underscore posted...

I wonder how the Israel haters on CE can simultaneously hold the opinions that the modern-day Israelis invaded the land and also that the US should grant amnesty to illegal immigrants and possibly have open borders as well.

Anyway, converting to Judaism (at least for the purpose of moving to Israel) isn't as simple as saying you're Jewish tbh. You have to work with a rabbi to convert, and they would be able to tell if you were serious or not.

1) There's plenty of room in the US.

2) Those immigrants aren't kicking Americans out of their homes.

3) Those immigrants are in shitty circumstances largely thanks to the west's imperialist actions in their part of the world. Funny how imperialists get mad at immigration (that they caused) for a better life if the immigrants decide to settle in their land, but it's okay to give away other people's land. Remember how the west caused the mess in the first place? Remember how the west turned away Jews and let them die? The west went along with zionists because they were anti-Semitic assholes who didn't want Jews living with them, but they have the gall to call Palestinians anti-Semitic even though they were living with Jews peacefully before then. They just happen to not like being kicked out of their homes.

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masterbarf posted...

The 50% of Arabs that got displaced, got displaced as a result of a war they started.

All of those displaced arabs personally had a hand in starting that war?

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Damn_Underscore posted...

Anyway, converting to Judaism (at least for the purpose of moving to Israel) isn't as simple as saying you're Jewish tbh. You have to work with a rabbi to convert, and they would be able to tell if you were serious or not.

i don't think that's a hard con lol.

There's somebody on this board; it might have been two separate posters, I never look at names; who cited voting in local elections and wanting to live within walking distance of a synagogue as evidence that Jews moving into a NYC neighborhood was bad. Somehow I think if it were voting soccer moms wanting to live close to a Whole Foods they wouldn't have given a shit. It would not surprise me if he sympathizes with illegal immigrants. Antisemitism seems to be something the right and left can agree on.

Lonestar2000 posted...

Nah, I don't want to support that apartheid ethnostate.

Great post!

Noumas posted...

Wait how are all of you uncircumcised? I thought it was only Europeans/Asians that don't circumcise. Doesnt USA still do it?

Vast majority of Australians don't
Lonestar2000 posted...

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ThyCorndog posted...

All of those displaced arabs personally had a hand in starting that war?

nah bro its ok to commit war crimes and annex land if u won the war

1337toothbrush posted...

Palestinians were fine living with Jews, not being kicked out of their homes.

They weren't, and they weren't until the a mandate gave them an excuse to escalate the already existing conflict.

Frankly, the fact that even seven decades later Palestinian leadership and its supporters still wish to eradicate Jews specifically, and countries that kicked citizens out just for being Jewish fund terrorism against Jews specifically, kind of makes it seem like it's a good thing there's a country in the area where Jews can freely thrive, alongside Christians, Muslims, and yes, gays and women too.

ThyCorndog posted...

All of those displaced arabs personally had a hand in starting that war?

No. And it's a tragedy. The whole fucking thing is a tragedy. If people simply respected each other's right to live with dignity, they could live together as neighboring countries and even open borders and benefit from each other.

masterbarf posted...

They weren't, and they weren't until the a mandate gave them an excuse to escalate the already existing conflict.

Frankly, the fact that even seven decades later Palestinian leadership and its supporters still wish to eradicate Jews specifically

[many citations needed]

it's a good thing there's a country in the area where Jews can freely thrive, alongside Christians, Muslims, and yes, gays and women too.

wow, I've never thought of it that way before.
and I'm never going to think of it that way again

hot take here: palestinians getting kicked out of their homes is... wait for it... bad.

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People on this website really believe Jews should lay down and accept death. And also think Antisemitism not only started with the British mandate but is okay because of it.

bellydancer posted...

Spend less than 2 years with the IDF.
Get a lot of training, life skills, benefits post military. Bang hot israelis
Get basically free higher education and your degree at great universities. Continue banging hot israelis
come back to America

thoughts?

Not giving up my perfectly fine unmutilated dick for all that

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@MarshawnLynch get in this topic

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lol israel

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Mabye if the native Jewish population started killing innocent Arabs in 1947 because they were upset that some of the land was designated as Arab territory, then lost a war they started, and presently wished literal genocide upon people who weren't even alive when the territories were drawn up, maye then people would think they are the saints with none of the blame for the current state of affairs. But no, to many, people are people, but Jews are just Jews.

masterbarf posted...

Mabye if the native Jewish population started killing innocent Arabs in 1947 because they were upset that some of the land was designated as Arab territory, then lost a war they started, and presently wished literal genocide upon people who weren't even alive when the territories were drawn up, maye then people would think they are the saints with none of the blame for the current state of affairs. But no, to many, people are people, but Jews are just Jews.

So if you were kicked out of your home and pushed into a ghetto, you'd be perfectly content with the people who took your home? Winning the war means nothing other than that you were more brutal. The Nazis had something to say about the strong over the weak.

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