Current Events > Masculinity. Do you think it's changing?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I was talking to my dad (he's 62) about a lot of different topics when I caught up with him last weekend. One of the topics that came up was masculinity.

He said that men today seem more comfortable with themselves than they did when he was growing up. Less restricted and more real and not as scared of showing emotions.

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no i think people are just starting to realize what it isnt

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Itisalwayschanging justlikeeverythingelse.

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https://www.oprahmag.com/entertainment/a30663865/dwayne-the-rock-johnson-oprah-2020-vision-tour-father-death/

Johnson credits therapy with helping him arrive to be, as Oprah put it, "comfortable with his softer side." For a long time, Johnson says, he was the "strong, silent type," and kept his "feelings and emotions buried in" in an effort to seem "tough."

"Over the years, you realize a) its unhealthy, and b) its just not me. I need to talk about my issues and fears. Not only am I okay with itI actually enjoy it," Johnson said. He believes masculinity is "completely changing," and it's a "longtime overdue."

Your dad and The Rock are both correct.

I'll always judge guys who get girly drinks (that includes whiteclaws).
Get a beer or something hard.

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DoubleDare posted...

I'll always judge guys who get girly drinks (that includes whiteclaws).
Get a beer or something hard.

youre so cool dude

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it gets better

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SSJCAT posted...

no i think people are just starting to realize what it isnt

Can you explain?

DoubleDare posted...

I'll always judge guys who get girly drinks (that includes whiteclaws).
Get a beer or something hard.

I mean... it's a drink. Judging someone over something that trivial? lol

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That means men are changing, not masculinity tbh.
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Leviathan1 posted...

Can you explain?

i think people are realizing that bottling up emotions isnt a masculine trait and is just straight up unhealthy

and that being into certain things or hobbies doesnt automatically make you less of a man

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SSJCAT posted...

i think people are realizing that bottling up emotions isnt a masculine trait and is just straight up unhealthy

and that being into certain things or hobbies doesnt automatically make you less of a man

Ah. Gotcha.

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my wood planing hobby doesn't make me less of a man

stop judging me

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Damn_Underscore posted...

That means men are changing, not masculinity tbh.

This, there will always be a group of masculine men.

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Leviathan1 posted...

I was talking to my dad (he's 62) about a lot of different topics when I caught up with him last weekend. One of the topics that came up was masculinity.

He said that men today seem more comfortable with themselves than they did when he was growing up. Less restricted and more real and not as scared of showing emotions.

I somewhat agree and disagree.

Men have always had emotions. Honestly, it just depends on the situation and what household you grew up in. Some homes are more emotional than others, while others are "tough" and constrain their feelings.

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DoubleDare posted...

This, there will always be a group of masculine men.

And masculine women. And feminine men, and feminine women, and various middle-grounds.

I disagree with the above person who said bottling up emotions isn't a masculine trait. It is an example of apathy which IMO is a masculine trait. But being a man doesn't mean you should have all masculine traits and being a woman doesn't mean you should have all feminine traits. That isn't healthy.
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Damn_Underscore posted...

I disagree with the above person who said bottling up emotions isn't a masculine trait. It is an example of apathy which IMO is a masculine trait.

Apathy isn't bottling up emotions, it's not having the emotions to bottle up in the first place. Apathy is not caring.

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Damn_Underscore posted...

And masculine women. And feminine men

This post could be shameful towards men and women, but I agree.

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Guide posted...

Apathy isn't bottling up emotions, it's not having the emotions to bottle up in the first place. Apathy is not caring.

Everyone has emotions. If not having emotions is seen as a masculine ideal people may bottle up emotions that they think they aren't supposed to have, leading to obviously bad results.

Edit: that is what I originally meant.
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DoubleDare posted...

I'll always judge guys who get girly drinks (that includes whiteclaws).
Get a beer or something hard.

Cocktails are just too delicious!

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WPqT6ZoyOuw

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Something something soymilk, beards, deferring to your wife to make decisions about how you get to spend your time, and opening your mouth really wide when you're excited...

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I think men just don't care about being manly at all these days. The typical definition of manly is mocked and people don't feel like they have to conform to that if they don't wanna.

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mrgoatthief posted...

Slowly but surely.

Damn_Underscore posted...

Everyone has emotions. If not having emotions is seen as a masculine ideal people may bottle up emotions that they think they aren't supposed to have, leading to obviously bad results.

Edit: that is what I originally meant.

Ah I gotcha. Feigned apathy, morelike.

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id say the prevalence of single mothers raising sons has probably shook it up some...

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I will agree it is changing. Like you're still masculine if you do the dishes (plus I live by myself), vacuum and such.
I meam cmon, gotta keep the place tidy if I want to bring ladies over.

Also I'm 35, so I do still think stuff like girly drinks like I said
Tho yea its good we can admit our feeling, just don't cry unless its at a funeral.


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bump for more opinions.

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Lol whats funny is Mr.StrongManlyMan can cry and still be manly but regardless if i cry im still Mr.Sissy.

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Lairen posted...

Lol whats funny is Mr.StrongManlyMan can cry and still be manly but regardless if i cry im still Mr.Sissy.

Says who?

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SSJCAT posted...

no i think people are just starting to realize what it isnt

Good answer.

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Lairen posted...

Lol whats funny is Mr.StrongManlyMan can cry and still be manly but regardless if i cry im still Mr.Sissy.

Context would be very important.

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JACKBUTTMOMMY posted...

Not everyone has emotions.

Sociopaths, yes, but for the purposes of his post, I get him.

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This man said a beer

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DoubleDare posted...

I will agree it is changing. Like you're still masculine if you do the dishes (plus I live by myself), vacuum and such.
I meam cmon, gotta keep the place tidy if I want to bring ladies over.

Also I'm 35, so I do still think stuff like girly drinks like I said
Tho yea its good we can admit our feeling, just don't cry unless its at a funeral.

Masculinity is more about how you do things. For instance I always do the dishes, but its masculine because I do them better than anyone else. While slamming beers and listening to metal.

Naw, I don't think it's really changing. I think we got a fake internet personalities that I never see outside the internet, person trying to sell something on tv/internet, or college people trying to conform.

BuckVanHammer posted...

id say the prevalence of single mothers raising sons has probably shook it up some...

"toxic masculinity" seems to be far more prevalent among such sons, but that's not a discussion society seems ready for yet

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Not really. Maybe more "softer" dudes around now but other than that I think it's pretty much the same

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Abiz_ posted...

Naw, I don't think it's really changing. I think we got a fake internet personalities that I never see outside the internet, person trying to sell something on tv/internet, or college people trying to conform.

Yes, masculinity is still mostly the same, don't like reddit/internet or the media fool you.

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Leviathan1 posted...

I was talking to my dad (he's 62) about a lot of different topics when I caught up with him last weekend. One of the topics that came up was masculinity.

He said that men today seem more comfortable with themselves than they did when he was growing up. Less restricted and more real and not as scared of showing emotions.

your dad is just older. Some people get softer with age.

masculinity is not changing.

Ever since LITERALLY the times of ancient Greece men have been lamenting how the new generations are not manly and tough like the great men of yore. You're not a man because you need a spear to kill an elk, while your (mythical) ancestors could kill a fucking bear with their bare hands (newsflash - it never happened).

Then people were not "real men" because they didn't fight on the Greece vs Sparta or whatever wars... and then people were not "real men" because they fought with guns and not with swords like their ancestors. You get the drift.

Men are always held to the standards of their ancestors, who came from more brutal, more primitive times, and these standards are often unrealistic and romanticized and were never real to start with. Do you really think men were getting their legs chopped at war and still fighting and going like "fuck you Hades, I am going to keep fighting on 1 leg for the glory of sparta!"?

No man is manly enough, and that results in a bunch of fragile, frustrated men who feel they're not real men and they end getting psychological disorders and becoming shooters and things like that.

The cycle will not end, believe it or not our grandsons will look at us and see us like "real men" because we had the "toughness" to use a steering wheel in our cars or the "finger strength" to physically press keys on the keyboard or something like that, lmao.

Lairen posted...

Lol whats funny is Mr.StrongManlyMan can cry and still be manly but regardless if i cry im still Mr.Sissy.

not really, no.
Many, many women still, and will always judge men by "manly standards", and that includes not crying.

Think of say, a fact of life. If an NFL player kicked a guy right on the nuts, full force, no warning, the kicked guy would cry. It's a fact of life, it doesn't matter how manly the man is.

But if said man went on a first date with a girl and he received such a kick (let's say it was accidental, but still full force, by NFL guy) I guara-fucking-tee you he would get no second date because the girl saw the dude crying.

Men don't cry, period. You can afford to be seen crying by your girl if you have been dating her for a while and she is now emotionally invested, but that's it.

bump

it's kind of hard being an American dude in 2020, i think that men are a lot less secure today but are told repeatedly that they arent supposed to feel that way. imo the big culprit is the breakdown of group identity in the US, changing demographics, & changes in communication

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Romulox28 posted...

it's kind of hard being an American dude in 2020, i think that men are a lot less secure today but are told repeatedly that they arent supposed to feel that way. imo the big culprit is the breakdown of group identity in the US, changing demographics, & changes in communication

Are you trying to blame "teh immugrtanz" for this? Just double checking

Coastal_elite posted...

Are you trying to blame "teh immugrtanz" for this? Just double checking

no ROD, take a deep breath and relax, it's all going to be ok

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SSJCAT posted...

no i think people are just starting to realize what it isnt

Superb answer that I didn't even have to scroll for.

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I think Rudyard Kipling said it best, and it hasn't changed really since then.

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