Current Events > Well I had my date with the girl I've been romancing and I'm bummed

(+) Yeah! (+)

I'm very much a romantic at heart and I show that when I do the online chatting, but I don't do it in person. So I hugged her when I picked her up, but then we never even touched the rest of the time.

We had a nice dinner and talked a lot, nothing at all awkward about it. Then we went to a movie and that's where I thought we'd be cuddling the whole time but no, we just sat there and watched it.

And I will add that she looks nothing like what she does in online pictures. She's fat, and her face is hardly even recognizable. Those filters really work wonders. We've been sending snapchat pictures to each other every day and I show my real self but I guess everything from her is more like a work of art.

So after the movie I just drove her back to her house and then we didn't even hug or anything at the end. She just left.

I feel so weird about the whole thing. We've been texting to each other like we're totally in love and then we meet and neither one of us seemed really into it. I mean if she was coming on to me at all I would have been into it, she just wasn't.

I spent $120 on that dinner too.

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It's a bummer man, that's, that's a bummer

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Jokes on you.

The sad truth is that even though online dating feels like the only way to meet girls, it's just shitty.

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I mean, if she basically catfished you then you shouldn't feel guilty of messing things up if you do >_>. You obviously can still like her but you shouldn't feel obligated to act any certain way. Hope it clicks for you eventually or whatever outcome is the best for you.

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Do you think she wondered the whole time how you felt about her not looking the same in person, and that maybe that's what killed the mood for both of you?

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kinetika_ posted...

Do you think she wondered the whole time how you felt about her not looking the same in person, and that maybe that's what killed the mood for both of you?

This is interesting

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Lost_All_Senses posted...

I mean, if she basically catfished you then you shouldn't feel guilty of messing things up if you do >_>. You obviously can still like her but you shouldn't feel obligated to act any certain way. Hope it clicks for you eventually or whatever outcome is the best for you.

I talked to her about the "catfishing" thing and she acted like she never heard of it. She really was honest to me though. Where I acted like she was the perfect woman she finally admitted that she weighs 160 pounds and sent me an "unfiltered" picture where she looked a lot different than her hot pictures... but looking at that now, even that didn't look like her.

I think she's just gained a lot of weight over the past couple months and she does Myspace angles to hide it in selfies. Meanwhile I've been doing Peloton every day and trying to get myself in the best possible shape before we meet.

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Purely posted...

I talked to her about the "catfishing" thing and she acted like she never heard of it. She really was honest to me though. Where I acted like she was the perfect woman she finally admitted that she weighs 160 pounds and sent me an "unfiltered" picture where she looked a lot different than her hot pictures... but looking at that now, even that didn't look like her.

I think she's just gained a lot of weight over the past couple months and she does Myspace angles to hide it in selfies. Meanwhile I've been doing Peloton every day and trying to get myself in the best possible shape before we meet.

Do you feel shallow if you brush her off or something? I think people who work on themselves deserve others that work on themselves. Plus, why would you want someone around that might interrupt your momentum of getting fit. Some people can respect you being you, but most people just want you to be as lazy as them so they don't feel as bad about themselves. I dunno this girl. You just gotta look out for that stuff

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Never spend that much money on dinner for a girl again.

And movies are a bad first date thing. You just sit there in the dark and dont talk. Go to a bar and see music instead imo, then go for a walk downtown.

Purely posted...

I talked to her about the "catfishing" thing and she acted like she never heard of it. She really was honest to me though. Where I acted like she was the perfect woman she finally admitted that she weighs 160 pounds and sent me an "unfiltered" picture where she looked a lot different than her hot pictures... but looking at that now, even that didn't look like her.

I think she's just gained a lot of weight over the past couple months and she does Myspace angles to hide it in selfies. Meanwhile I've been doing Peloton every day and trying to get myself in the best possible shape before we meet.

Maybe don't look at your investment (the Peleton) in yourself as wasted, rather an investment for yourself to feel even better when you meet the next girl.

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Go bowling and deliberately do worse than her

the panties will melt off

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Keith_Valentine posted...

Never spend that much money on dinner for a girl again.

And movies are a bad first date thing. You just sit there in the dark and dont talk. Go to a bar and see music instead imo, then go for a walk downtown.

This is also good advice. Movies as first dates are for highschool, when making out for an hour straight is actually appealing

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Purely posted...

It's a bummer man, that's, that's a bummer

I understood that reference

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Purely posted...

I spent $120 on that dinner too.

yowie wowie.

sucks tc. youll find the right person some day.

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Holy shit she ate $120 worth of food

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Keith_Valentine posted...

Never spend that much money on dinner for a girl again.

And movies are a bad first date thing. You just sit there in the dark and dont talk. Go to a bar and see music instead imo, then go for a walk downtown.

Our first connection was that we like horror movies, so naturally we said we should go see one together. I know that just going to a movie is a no-no, which is why we did dinner first. We were together for 2 hours before we went to the movie.

Lost_All_Senses posted...

Do you feel shallow if you brush her off or something? I think people who work on themselves deserve others that work on themselves. Plus, why would you want someone around that might interrupt your momentum of getting fit. Some people can respect you being you, but most people just want you to be as lazy as them so they don't feel as bad about themselves. I dunno this girl. You just gotta look out for that stuff

These days it's not common that you find a woman who you know would be 100% faithful, who doesn't smoke or do any kind of drugs, and who has the same interests in movies. This girl and I had a really good connection and the past week chatting with her online has been amazing. Just her sending me a flirty text would give me a raging boner. So this whole situation makes me feel really weird. I know I'm partly to blame because in reality I'm not the Romeo that I act like in texts with her. We both act a lot different in person.


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Touch posted...

Holy shit she ate $120 worth of food

lmao, do you think she dodged the salad

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Touch posted...

Holy shit she ate $120 worth of food

I was prepared to spend more than that, and I was able to get our movie tickets for free so this was my only expenditure. I was telling her if she wanted to get a bottle of wine I'm down, but she just got one drink.

We each got separate deserts though which was dumb. I had a vision of us sharing a desert together and kind of fighting with our forks and that would be our first saliva swapping... she was insistent on this chocolate cake thing though and I'm not into that shit.

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Purely posted...

Our first connection was that we like horror movies, so naturally we said we should go see one together. I know that just going to a movie is a no-no, which is why we did dinner first. We were together for 2 hours before we went to the movie.

These days it's not common that you find a woman who you know would be 100% faithful, who doesn't smoke or do any kind of drugs, and who has the same interests in movies. This girl and I had a really good connection and the past week chatting with her online has been amazing. Just her sending me a flirty text would give me a raging boner. So this whole situation makes me feel really weird. I know I'm partly to blame because in reality I'm not the Romeo that I act like in texts with her. We both act a lot different in person.

So you both feel insufficient to the versions of yourself that are shown on technology? Pretty sure that mutual with like 90% of people. Once I realized most people had the same anxieties I have, it made everything way easier. It kind of would be shallow to throw away a personal connection over the size of her. I'm at the age where I care waaay more about clicking with the person on a deeper level. As soon as I like a girls personality, she looks cuter to me anyway.

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