Current Events > So my dad died, he was a monster though

(+) Yeah! (+)

What's with that, lately a lot of friends on Facebook and here have had pets and family dying, and if not that then car accidents that totalled their vehicle.

I'm not really sad, just feeling weird since I never got to tell him off. Also I had a high school dream last night and had to explain to a counselor that I don't live with my dad. So I guess I felt it coming in my dream, universe reaching out and all that crap.

He had it coming, honestly. He was drunk driving and killed his second wife in the crash, and became a quadriplegic. So because he didn't have a ton of money, him having a shortened life from that was a given.

And yet despite all the bullshit he put us through, I wish him the peace he doesn't deserve because honestly? I've found my peace with him not being in my life long before he passed, the only news from my family I wanted about him was that he died.

That all said, I'll probably want to scream in anger all those things I wish I said to him about how awful he was.
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gunplagirl posted...

That all said, I'll probably want to scream in anger all those things I wish I said to him about how awful he was.

That will be your next recurring dream at some point.
On those lovely fever dream nights.
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shockthemonkey posted...

Fuck.

Thats a lot to take in. Im glad youre feeling alright about all this though. Or at least convincing yourself that you do.

The dream was far more emotionally tolling than this news. I'm worried about my siblings and mom. Sisters are both angry for good reason.

I think my final revenge is he'll never get to know the real me or have seen more than my profile picture.

Oh, Halloween was my 5 year anniversary of my gender marker change and the middle of this month will mark the 5 year anniversary of my legal name change.
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SiO4 posted...

gunplagirl posted...

That all said, I'll probably want to scream in anger all those things I wish I said to him about how awful he was.

That will be your next recurring dream at some point.
On those lovely fever dream nights.

I dunno, I'm mostly bothered by things like my dream last night. Started out with a lady being cannibalized by a zombie and she threatened anyone who tried to interfere. She looked like a cut up pig inside. :/

Better than the immolation dreams.
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One side of the story.

@A_A_Battery

So are you looking to get warned or what
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Sorry to hear that, but also sorry to hear he was a monster. I wouldn't call mine that, but he sure as fuck has one living in his head and the last time it came out, I just completely lost any desire to interact with him in any capacity due to what it unburied from many years ago. Feel free to PM if you want to vent or exchange ventings.
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I get what you're going through.

My Dad left when I was 16 and I never spoke to him again. I hated the bastard and wasn't sad when he died. But I did regret that I never got to confront him and talk to him as an adult and lost out on the opportunity to get any sort of closure on certain things.
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wow, at least you seem to be handling it well. if youre still bummed about never having gotten to tell him off, you can always spit or piss on his grave. that's what i'm planning on doing to ma
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gunplagirl posted...

@A_A_Battery

So are you looking to get warned or what

Im due for one to be sure, I just dont take at face value someone calling their father a monster without seeing his side of the story and what merits he might have had.

damn, CE needs to square with their old man before it's too late

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A_A_Battery posted...

gunplagirl posted...

@A_A_Battery

So are you looking to get warned or what

Im due for one to be sure, I just dont take at face value someone calling their father a monster without seeing his side of the story and what merits he might have had.

you came into a topic about a user's dead abusive father, in which tc states her conflicted feelings but ultimately hoped he was at peace

to shitpost. poor form, real classless
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Good luck with everything
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Archibleedies posted...

you came into a topic about a user's dead abusive father, in which tc states her conflicted feelings but ultimately hoped he was at peace

to shitpost. poor form, real classless

Not shitposting, I just believe parents deserve more respect than to be called monsters after their death. If I see that, I wouldnt just take it as is.

Machete posted...

Sorry to hear that, but also sorry to hear he was a monster. I wouldn't call mine that, but he sure as fuck has one living in his head and the last time it came out, I just completely lost any desire to interact with him in any capacity due to what it unburied from many years ago. Feel free to PM if you want to vent or exchange ventings.

I appreciate it.

a-c-a-b posted...

I get what you're going through.

My Dad left when I was 16 and I never spoke to him again. I hated the bastard and wasn't sad when he died. But I did regret that I never got to confront him and talk to him as an adult and lost out on the opportunity to get any sort of closure on certain things.

Yeah. I'm reminded of that flashback scene in FFX where Tidus's mom tells him if he's dead then Tidus will never get to yell at Jecht all the things he wanted to say.

Archibleedies posted...

wow, at least you seem to be handling it well. if youre still bummed about never having gotten to tell him off, you can always spit or piss on his grave. that's what i'm planning on doing to ma

Nah, he's nowhere near here and I'm not gonna travel to do that. He's not even getting a funeral, just cremation since he's former military. I'd like ashes to throw out, but I can make do with some ashes from the fireplace I guess.

berlyman101 posted...

damn, CE needs to square with their old man before it's too late

Right? I knew it was coming but fuck, it came up on me fast.
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Shitty for sure. Its good youre at peace with it though despite the past. Worlds brighter when you dont hold onto all that shit.

A_A_Battery posted...

Archibleedies posted...

you came into a topic about a user's dead abusive father, in which tc states her conflicted feelings but ultimately hoped he was at peace

to shitpost. poor form, real classless

Not shitposting, I just believe parents deserve more respect than to be called monsters after their death. If I see that, I wouldnt just take it as is.

Read the third fucking paragraph, the guy killed his second wife when he was drunk driving and he's finally succumbed to that accident years later. You're just being offensive.
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FightingJester posted...

Shitty for sure. Its good youre at peace with it though despite the past. Worlds brighter when you dont hold onto all that shit.

Yep. I mean, yay trauma. But I can work on moving past that as I discover it. Thankfully I have a bright mind and good friends and the resources at at my hands now.
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And he never regretted it, of course.

Look I dont know the guy, Im just letting you know I disapprove in principle to such disrespect even after a parents death. And if that gets me warned/suspended, so be it, I already pinged Crono in another topic and am expecting it any second now. Im not gonna let it slide though, I want you to know that me, some internet person, is not gonna see something like this and let it slide without stating that it remains just one side, a remark born out of a general air of disapproval.

shockthemonkey posted...

gunplagirl posted...

I think my final revenge is he'll never get to know the real me or have seen more than my profile picture.

Oh, Halloween was my 5 year anniversary of my gender marker change and the middle of this month will mark the 5 year anniversary of my legal name change.

I missed this when I came back to the topic but this is definitely some good payback. Fuck him. He doesnt deserve a great daughter.

Thanks. Between that and this and my boob implant consultation on Wednesday, well. November's a busy month for me.
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https://youtu.be/5Dm0NQgDQWY

How I'm feeling lol
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berlyman101 posted...

damn, CE needs to square with their old man before it's too late

For me, it won't happen because...

a-c-a-b posted...

I never got to confront him and talk to him as an adult and lost out on the opportunity to get any sort of closure on certain things.

such an opportunity/closure is something I could never have because of how he is. If I tried having that sort of conversation with him, I would make no progress. I would be likely not to even make it back to the line of scrimmage.
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Maybe. My dad reached out to me after less than two years and we met on my terms. I could see if a lot of people didn't have that option.

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Bump and hey, look who got suspended :o
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