Current Events > Can I open up to someone or some people here? I would like to talk about...

(+) Yeah! (+)

The problems I've been having without breaking the rules. If not that is okay. But that also means I'll just have to wait a while until I can set up an appointment for therapy/counselling.
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Whats wrong
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karlpilkington4 posted...

Whats wrong

My mental health mostly. I've been having the occasional bad dreams, but sometimes from time to time I feel as though I'm being physically tortured. And in some cases, I can actually feel the pain, and it's almost like real. Feelings of being stabbed, impaled, or getting parts of my body cut off.

In rare occurrences, I hear people laughing.

Not only that, but I get racing images in my head which I cannot seem to control. A few times, I saw an image of myself with the top part of my head being cut open, and I can see some shadowy hands around it too.

I also seem to have lost total control of my sub-vocalization(when you silently say things in your head.)
Often times when certain situations happen, like my dad going to work...I would sometimes say, "I hope you die." It has gotten to the point where I have even said slur words. I am not a racist, I am not a Nazi, or even a right winged type of guy. So I do not know why I even say those things in my head.
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It's also depressing me a lot too, and made me lose confidence in myself.
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Does this happen daily? Weekly?
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karlpilkington4 posted...

Does this happen daily? Weekly?

The bad dreams are usually every 2-3 days. Sometimes daily.

Racing images usually happen when I close my eyes trying to sleep, trying to shower, or zoning out.

The lost of total control of sub-vocalization seems to happen daily. It has even happened when I browse reddit and see certain pictures. It makes no sense to me.
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What is your environment like around you? Is it negative? Do you exercise? What's your diet like? Are you already taking meds? Has this been going on for awhile?
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karlpilkington4 posted...

What is your environment like around you? Is it negative? Do you exercise? What's your diet like? Are you already taking meds? Has this been going on for awhile?

I mostly spend time at home in my room at the computer. No it is not negative.

I do not exercise, so I am out of shape (Skinny with a beer belly. Or skinny-fat as some would call it.)

My diet? Canned soup with rice, oatmeal with nondairy milk along with some fruits, and random frozen food.

I am taking medications.

Yes this has been going on for years.
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