Current Events > My family's house hasn't felt like home for years and Christmas makes it obvious

(+) Yeah! (+)

Yet I the penniless high schooler have nowhere else to go

The day I have a place to myself will be a new era in my life.
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You're in high school?
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For one more semester yes
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You're sensitive, so are the sadists today. hours and minutes will pass
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It gets a lot better when you finally have agency in your life.
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Eh. Things change. Dynamics change.
We're all adults in my family now so the cliche christmas morning thing hasn't been the norm for years now.
Grandfather and step father are dead. Aunt doesn't come over anymore. I'm the oldest male in the family now. I live by myself. It's raining right now. The house is a mess from hosting the big dinner last night.
But none of it is sad or depressing. I still have a great time. I'm pretty sure we all do.
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Decaying tradition upsets me but that is in no way the crux of the issue. It's hard for me to relate to anyone besides one sister (who is a hoarder and a mess, that's not what I relate to). It seems that every couple months there is a mini intervention to clean up all of her shit, not explicitly to help her live better but because she never brings down her dishes and we run out of plates and cups and silverware.

I should note that I'm rarely home now because I managed to get into a boarding school. That perhaps increases my feeling of isolation or otherness but with the baby I think i would've gone insane if I stayed here every night.

My other sister... it is like nothing is going on in there. She just watches youtubers and yells at her destructive baby. Sometimes she parrots things she saw to me but I've never seen evidence of any critical thinking come out from her in the past several years. She had a run in with the law that involved running from home with a crazy guy.

Originally they were going to convert part of the basement into a nursery. But they're too lazy and hypocritical to ever get anything done that they start, so that never materialized. Now the living room and den is the defacto nursery. Big loud plastic toys everywhere, and Jesus Christ, they play 24/7 nursery rhymes on Netflix. It's just unbearable to be down there anymore. I used to enjoy laying down in the den with one of our cats, that is just a thing of the past. Maybe I am a sociopath or whatever but I fail to bond with the baby at all. It drools everywhere, screams, it's violent with its stuff. It disturbs me to be around it. I dont think it ever had a chance considering its parents.

My cat, he is pretty old now, and thinning. Hes got some weird stuff going on. My mom hates him and refuses to take him to a vet, shes just waiting for him to die basically. I mean what the fuck, man. What kind of inhuman witch do you have to be. We've had him for more than a dozen years by now. But they don't care to take care of those cats now that the baby is around.

My mom is a powder keg and can go from upbeat to distraught or angry in a moment with little provocation. That goes for the mood of the house. I'll hear laughter and come out to see people being cool, I go to the bathroom and by the time I come out it's like a morgue.

I think my dad is the most grounded guy but he isnt very mindful of what he says so he ends up setting off my sisters or mom and everyone becomes unhappy. It's like clockwork. It doesn't feel like a family here it's like animals or robots with a thin veil of etiquette.
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