Current Events > Man I miss The Critic so much.

(+) Yeah! (+)

"Waiter! Why's there an old lady's stocking in my soup?"

"She's not so old! ...I mean, that's a noodle."
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"and nothing of value was lost"
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"So run, don't mosey, to see the Tea Cozy. It really hits the spot!"

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*At Zombie convention*
"Doris, what are you doing here?"
"Looking for a husband."

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"Well, I was going to give you some rubber bands to play with, but fine, you can come."
"Awww, I could have had rubber bands."
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That show was years and years ahead of its time. I fucking loved it.

TV: "The Cowering Inferno! The Jay Sherman Story! With Jessica Tandy as the courageous Doris and Sumo Wrestler Tohru Sakai as the cowardly film critic!"
Tohru: "HELP, HELP. I GOT TO GO POTTY!"
Marty: "Did you really say that dad?"
Jay: "I may have uttered the word "potty" but they took it WAY out of context.

Ice cream store guy: "Our freezer is broken! We need somebody to eat 50 gallons of ice cream!"
Marty runs into the Icecream Parlor
Ice cream store guy: "It's Jay Sherman's kid! We're saved!"

Jay: "I know I am not going to win the marathon but I just want to finish>"
Doris: "You'll do fine! Remember this poem. 'Never Quit. Though your heart may pound, and you're short of breath. Well quitting my friend is a fate worse than death!"
Jay: "That's great!"
Doris: "I read it in Smoker's Digest."

Jay: "Hello Vlada. Tonight, I am on a diet!"
Vlada picks up phone and whispers
Vlada: "Tell Vlada Jr. no Harvard"
Jay: "Infact, I may just have a coffee"
Vlada on nearly verge of tears
Vlada: "Pull the plug on mama!"

Jay: Honeyyyy.....Yeah, sugar sugar! Where is my candy bar? I think it was a charleston chewwww..... THERE IT ISSSSSSSSSS. I'M GONNA EAT TONIGHT! *Achem Achemachemachemachemachem!*

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Helicopter airlifting Jay: "I don't understand, this thing's supposed to be able to lift a tank."
Jay: "Can you say that a little louder? I don't think they heard you in Jordan."
Distant voice: "Yes we did!"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APIklM0wRg8" data-time="
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ForestLogic posted...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=APIklM0wRg8" data-time="

I freaking love Franklin. He's one of the best characters.
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The Red Balloon 2