Current Events > Gotta evict my sister and her kids from my house next time we're alone :/.

(+) Yeah! (+)

She finally displayed way too much just the extent my kindness is being taken for a weakness. She's been biting the hand for a year and I can't do it anymore. The hands reduced to a nub and my sanity is being threatened at this point. I literally lost sleep over it last night. Don't really need advice, Im confident in my own way. This topic is basically just to vent until I can actually do it. We have a reveal party to go to later for my cousin so doing it now would just bite me in the ass anyway since I "rely" on her unreliable ass for rides.

Quotations are cause I had no trouble getting along without her rides when she lived across the country. I still love her but Im an introvert that has given up my sanctuary for over a year and this is done. Im now at the point where I can do this and feel nothing about it. Im completely convinced I will mentally have no blowback despite her reaction. Warm hearts eventually cool down.
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Conflict posted...

Need more details

I will answer any questions. They will leave before it effects how I treat her too.
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I actually should go talk to my sister who always had my back on this before I initiate it. She already dealt with this exact thing actually. She'd be really helpful
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now THIS is what it's like WHEN WORLDS COLLLLLLLLIDE!!!!!!

ARE YOU READY TO GO?
YES I'M READY TO GO
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Sounds like this happened
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How old are the kids?

How do you support yourself?

How does she?

What is she doing to upset you so much.
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What did she do to warrant an eviction from a sibling?
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She's probably being controlling in a give and take situation that's getting TC no where.
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NeoShadowhen posted...

How old are the kids?

How do you support yourself?

How does she?

12 & 2. If this wasn't a factor she would of been gone way over half a year ago. This is literally the only reason it took this long. My sympathy for her alone dried up on like month 3.

I get SSI. Own the house so I just pay all the monthly bills with it.

I know Im an idiot but I never ask. I know she gets child support, that might be it. I never wanted to make this about money and she hasn't paid me since like month 2.
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weekoldhotdog posted...

She's probably being controlling in a give and take situation that's getting TC no where.

Well she can't control anything I do she is strongly controlling the things I can't do. Like guarantee peace and quiet for one >_>. But I realized how selfish it was to kick a family member I love out over that shit so that's just one thing that has really been chipping away at my sanity
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As long as you can still get by without the income from her, kick her ass to the curb. Just bc shes fam, doesnt mean youre a favor factory.
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cjsdowg posted...

What is she doing to upset you so much.

I mentioned she doesn't pay me which isn't a huge deal this final straw was that shes suppose to be finishing fixing up a house, it was suppose to be done 2 months after she moved in. Now it's obvious she knew that wasn't actually gonna happen. It has been obvious for awhile.

So while shes supposedly working on her house last night it turns out the last couple hours were actually towards setting up a trampoline she bought....so not only did she have "extra" money but she dedicated time away from doing the shit she was suppose to set it up. Again the money is less of a slap in the face than the time to me. I want my nieces to have nice shit even if it's at my expense. But now it's to the point she is pretty much using them to constantly slap me in the fuckin face
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Lordgold666 posted...

As long as you can still get by without the income from her, kick her ass to the curb. Just bc shes fam, doesnt mean youre a favor factory.

She literally pays me nothing. I also lived alone for years before this. She's actually lucky my friends are broke too so all my hobbies are either free or super cheap. Like disc golfing and pokemon Go
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I wouldn't say I'm in the same situation as you, but next month I have to nudge my family into moving out of my house.

My brother and mom have been living at my house for 1 and 2 years respectively, due to bad rental history. That's going to be cleared up and they'll be able to get their own places. Which they've tried to before, so I know they want to. But I could see them being lazy about it since they're kind of lazy in general right now.
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One the worse parts is I actually love living with my 12 year old niece. She is wise and playful making and someone who is just insanely fun to hang out with. I enjoy her company way more than pretty much all adults because it's so relaxing to be around someone the world hasn't gotten to that's not an idiot >_>. It's corny but she is one those kids that makes me feel like a kid again.
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pauIie posted...

I wouldn't say I'm in the same situation as you, but next month I have to nudge my family into moving out of my house.

My brother and mom have been living at my house for 1 and 2 years respectively, due to bad rental history. That's going to be cleared up and they'll be able to get their own places. Which they've tried to before, so I know they want to. But I could see them being lazy about it since they're kind of lazy in general right now.

It's hard man. Especially being the youngest while shes the oldest. She strongly influenced who I am. Luckily I don't have the qualities putting her in this situation. I also don't know what my mind would be like if I had to also include 2 kids into my thought process tho....oh wait I guess I kind of do now...damn.

Im not playing about this sanity thing tho. I literally screamed into my hands at 3am last night >_>. Whenever I tried to turn my head to fall asleep every thought on this just jumped to the front and filled me with frustration. I wouldn't pull the plug if I honestly felt I could keep going.
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weekoldhotdog posted...

now THIS is what it's like WHEN WORLDS COLLLLLLLLIDE!!!!!!

ARE YOU READY TO GO?
YES I'M READY TO GO

Oh God no! 5000!!!!!!
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ACHEEKSMALLOY posted...

weekoldhotdog posted...

now THIS is what it's like WHEN WORLDS COLLLLLLLLIDE!!!!!!

ARE YOU READY TO GO?
YES I'M READY TO GO

Oh God no! 5000!!!!!!

This just reminds me of Tony Hawk games and that ATV game.
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Are you just going to kick them out or are you going to give the a time table.
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cjsdowg posted...

Are you just going to kick them out or are you going to give the a time table.

Time table. Either the 15th of next month or a full month. Haven't decided. But Im stone-walling as soon as that date is brought up. I will make living here miserable by snapping any everything regardless of if I want to. Literally anything she says to me I want to rage about but I have the hindsight to realize starting too much tension while she is here will just bite me in the ass. Ive always had this mechanism where I can mask almost everything I feel with humorous retorts. And I enjoy my own brand of humor enough to convince myself Im happy in these moments.
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What exactly is your sister like? Like what's driving you crazy that she's doing
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Gonna shower tho. I actually did not expect CE to do this good at letting me vent on this. You guys are alright sometimes.
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Genocet_10-325 posted...

What exactly is your sister like? Like what's driving you crazy that she's doing

Ill answer this before I break. It's everything Ive mentioned. Our family shows a lot of love and compassion so it's always deep seeded shit that causes any confrontation. I literally went from calling her an asshole and douchebag in front of her kids last night (I was wrong for that) and instantly rerouted the conversation into jokes because I didn't want to carry the weight. The negative on this is apparently if you make a joke out of everything you eventually become the joke and the line crossed is invisible
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Good luck on your plans, while I would not go the passive aggressive rout myself. You are living something that I could not dream of. So I have no idea what I would do. I really feel bad for you situation.
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cjsdowg posted...

Good luck on your plans, while I would not go the passive aggressive rout myself. You are living something that I could not dream of. So I have no idea what I would do. I really feel bad for you situation.

Damn man. This made me feel good. Thanks. I mean a year ago I never thought I would be able to do this either but life picks at you man. Literally a year of giving up the only place you had to yourself picks at your compassion and sympathy. I mean when I get overwhelmed and need to recalibrate I have to walk away from the very place that once served this purpose. Not to mention I get SSI for a reason so walking away from my own home is literally physically painful for me at times. There is so many factors playing into this I can respond with a huge paragraph to anything with more new information. Ive never broke before and Ive been through a lot.
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Need pics of sister before giving appropriate advice.

EliteLevel posted...

Need pics of sister before giving appropriate advice.

No. But she was a low level model in cali for awhile. Chew on that information without pics CE.
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Tag
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DragonGirlYuki posted...

Tag

For what? It seems like no pics are forthcoming. TC is obviously trolling.

I don't care for the pics, but the story is interesting.
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Also why get offended over a 3 letter t word?
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DragonGirlYuki posted...

Also why get offended over a 3 letter t word?

...Im not offended.

I find it amusing when people react to the 3 letter t word, more so if they are mad.
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DragonGirlYuki posted...

I find it amusing when people react to the 3 letter t word, more so if they are mad.

I see.

Our family shows a lot of love and compassion so it's always deep seeded s*** that causes any confrontation

Having said that, have you told her your issues with her and gotten an explanation or have you been quietly getting pissed and plotting a scheme to kick her out so you don't have to face your problems?

Hopefully you're giving written notice because verbal notice for this is pointless
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Deal with it then hate fuck her once ina while

The best kind of sex.

Yeah, what state are you in? Is she getting mail? What if she refuses to leave?
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that sucks. you wanna do right for yourself... I get it. do what you gotta do.

here's my spiel. confrontation leads to further understanding. when you confront her, you'll hear things that you might have not known. she will be blindsided to hear things from you she didnt know too.

I just hope the continued use of open communication keeps going in order to further understand where each other is coming from.
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BlkPopeIseem posted...

Deal with it then hate fuck her once ina while

The best kind of sex.

Fucking lol
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Had that reveal party and am too tired to get back into this. I actually had a really good time despite this being on the back of my mind. Ive always been good at holding shit down like that tho. I want to sleep soon and having a discussion like this will jolt me back awake. Plus Im watching Arrested Development :3. I did talk to my other sister about all this earlier tho. And she I really don't think she wants to look so bad in front of everyone that she would pull that 30 shit after I already give her 30 days. She's does have a degree of pride. Plus already knows my family would be way more sympathetic of me. Typing that made me realize I wouldn't be able to do something like this without the support. Goodnight for now CE. Thank you again. I feel this has really factored in on the positive side.
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What if she begs you and agrees to start paying you rent?
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nicklebro posted...

What if she begs you and agrees to start paying you rent?

Money doesn't make the difference to me. She only paid in the beginning cause she thought it would. My sister gave me a reality check about how making her pay would be about making her more motivated to leave and get shit done. Im such a fuckin blind idiot for not realizing this on my own. Why would someone rush to move into a house they have to pay all the bills for when they are bumming at someones house for free >_>. I always expect people to be way more prideful then they end up.
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Btw. Im not really into this discussion atm. Ill probably jump around other topics but if questions are asked Ill either answer them anyway or after I go disc golfing later. I gotta take my mental breaks from these things when my mind allows me.... probably why Im a year deep into this problem
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