Current Events > I thought things got better in America. Most parents still are Bigots to kids

(+) Yeah! (+)

At my work I have kids come talk frankly to me about their home life and I listen. Its mostly normal stuff but it really lets you into the world of 2018 young parents in their 30s with like 9 year old kids.

Like parents will actively have "talks" with their kids about "well he is gay and that is ok but we don't want you to be gay so don't do stuff."

So the parents will tell their young kids not to hold their best friends hand because its gay, or not to watch a movie with a girl as a the main character because that is gay. Tell them not to hang around a gay classmate because they might become gay. Don't listen to RnB or romance music because its gay.

I mean its fucking insane stuff but the kids will tell me this and explain how their home life is. Most of these kids aren't gay but their parents are "fake liberal" as in they openly support LGBT rights to friends and strangers but in their own home they will use some kind of stereotypical macho factor as a way to determine what is "gay" and what is not and somehow this will raise their kid "correctly."

I have had children tell me their best friend isn't allowed to come to their house to play Fortnite anymore because he once came over and took his shoes off and had pink socks and his mom noticed and told her husband and they had a talk with their son and now he can't tell his friend why he can't come over but his parents are not budging on this issue.

And these are seemingly normal parents like when I meet them they are educated and have strong liberal opinions like myself but they are fakes.

My mind is blown and the sad thing is I honestly naively thought we were starting to get over this but parents are still fearful of "gayness" in their kids and do extremely stupid and dumb things to protect their kids and help them be raised "not gay"

In a classroom there was one kid that jokingly said he there is nothing wrong with being gay, I'm gay and then quick nervously glanced around at his friends and me and then said "pls don't tell my parents they will be mad."

It breaks my heart CE ;_;
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Shit's fucked. Hopefully, someday we, as a society, will pay less attention to the sexual orientation of others.
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Where do you live?
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It's really sad when parents teach their kids to hate or discriminate rather than empathy and acceptance.

its still unreal to me that there are grown adults who think they can randomly "turn gay" or be tempted to "do gay stuff and turn gay as a result"...what is wrong with people?
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- Preach tolerance for gay people

- Cries when their child comes out as gay
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They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one anothers throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And dont have any kids yourself.

- Philip Larkin

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.
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Meh. I was raised in a very racist conservative household and if anything that's what inspired me to be as far away from that shit as possible
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Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

so when did you choose to be straight?
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things are better than they were, but still not great
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Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Adoption, and if you really want biological children, surrogacy is very much a thing.

Don't be silly.
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WafflehouseJK posted...

Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Adoption, and if you really want biological children, surrogacy is very much a thing.

Don't be silly.

Perhaps. Most gay people I know aren't interested in having kids though. Some do but I think it's in the minority
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Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Ancient pagans slaughtered goats because they wanted good weather
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Are you sure that the kids are not just misunderstanding, and they're parents are telling them not to do stuff that looks gay out of fear they will get bullied?

halomonkey1_3_5 posted...

things are better than they were, but still not great

This
We are at a point where it's okay for others to be gay, but many still don't want them around their kids for fear of infection or whatever the fuck they think.

Being straight is outright easier. I can see how parents want that for their kids, but it's not like you really get to choose.
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Balrog0 posted...

Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Ancient pagans slaughtered goats because they wanted good weather

While idk what that has to do with anything unless your suggesting parents kill their children if they turn out gay which is very uncool, That is very interesting. Tell me more.
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Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Balrog0 posted...

Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Ancient pagans slaughtered goats because they wanted good weather

While idk what that has to do with anything unless your suggesting parents kill their children if they turn out gay which is very uncool, That is very interesting. Tell me more.

There are gay people with kids and straight people that never have kids. His point is that your original comment has nothing to do with the topic either, besides being an outdated superstition.

considering its not really a choice, who cares
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M_Live posted...

TheVipaGTS posted...

its still unreal to me that there are grown adults who think they can randomly "turn gay" or be tempted to "do gay stuff and turn gay as a result"...what is wrong with people?

People like that I honestly feel are insecure or hiding something. I'm a straight dude, have gay friends and family members, and have never once been tempted to do something gay like they have some weird hypnotic control over me or something if I'm around them. If you fear that being around a gay person might tempt you to suck a dick, you probably already wanted to suck a dick tbh

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I kinda get it. It doesn't excuse it, but there may be a method behind it.

It's not that these parents would think less of their children if they were gay. They just want to protect their child and want the best for them and they know that this world is still not entirely friendly to gay people. Gay people still experience greater danger and more social problems than straight people.

It's shitty reasoning (especially in the realm of "do things so they won't turn gay"), but it makes sense in a twisted way.
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CyricZ posted...

I kinda get it. It doesn't excuse it, but there's a method behind it.

It's not that these parents would think less of their children if they were gay. They just want to protect their child and want the best for them and they know that this world is still not entirely friendly to gay people. Gay people still experience greater danger and more social problems than straight people.

It's shitty reasoning (especially in the realm of "do things so they won't turn gay"), but it makes sense in a twisted way.

It's irrelevant and they are being ignorant at best. Being gay isn't a choice.
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Ben_Ruggiero posted...

WafflehouseJK posted...

Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

Adoption, and if you really want biological children, surrogacy is very much a thing.

Don't be silly.

Perhaps. Most gay people I know aren't interested in having kids though. Some do but I think it's in the minority

Most I know do
Source: gay person who's primarily friends with gay people
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Youngster_Joey_ posted...

Are you sure that the kids are not just misunderstanding, and they're parents are telling them not to do stuff that looks gay out of fear they will get bullied?

No. They mean it as in "don't be gay. Period."

It's that subconscious bias that they pass on to kids that makes kids in turn become homophobes and even when those kids support gay rights, still usually have their own biases that need to be addressed. Same thing with transgender people. Most cis people who I know that have said they support us don't actually mean they support us in any meaningful capacity. They still can uphold systematic discrimination. Like that whole "cake shop is right" argument. It's never been about the cakes, it's about whether or not lgbt people deserve to actually exist in society. Any business that isn't government operated or a hospital is basically a private business. I'm quite sure there's more than a few communities out there where if allowed to deny service, they'd never sell anyone they suspected of being gay any gas, groceries or even let you rent a hotel room. Moreover, there are already some states pushing laws allowing doctors to deny service to lgbt people or women who have had abortions.

Basically? Cis het people never have to consider the implications because homophobia will never directly harm them unless they act in a way that's perceived as such.

Basically, society is awful.
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CyricZ posted...

I kinda get it. It doesn't excuse it, but there may be a method behind it.

It's not that these parents would think less of their children if they were gay. They just want to protect their child and want the best for them and they know that this world is still not entirely friendly to gay people. Gay people still experience greater danger and more social problems than straight people.

It's shitty reasoning (especially in the realm of "do things so they won't turn gay"), but it makes sense in a twisted way.

I dunno its more of them wanting to prevent their kids from becoming gay so if they do anything that their parents view as "gay" then its a problem for them. I mean if a kid likes to hold his best friends had why hinder his emotions? If he wants to watch a cartoon more catered for his sister and his parents catch him watching it on more than one occasion and give him a talking to and then maybe give him less videogame time the next time they catch him doing it. These small things little by little stack up and really mess up a child all because the parents have weird notions of not wanting their kid to "become gay" >_>
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@Ben_Ruggiero posted...

Parents would prefer their kids not be gay because they want grandchildren. Shocking.

when did you decide to be straight? did you ask your parents if they were okay with it?
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