Current Events > Tinder/Okcupid/ etc General

(+) Yeah! (+)

So couple things

Been starting to get intimate with this new girl. First realization is that, just like my ex, who I also started dating in the winter, I had no idea just how stacked she was due to winter coats, holy shit.

Also, could be the fact that Im far more self-assure than I was a year ago and off my meds, but Im almost convinced my ex is gay. We never just made out and sex was infrequent and had always been a little stilted. Was a reoccurring problem with her across relationships. Again, plenty of other factors couldve been involved, but several people who knew her have made that comment
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First time feeling kinda nervous before a date

Does anybody have any negging tips
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Make stupid jokes
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"How do you fit 10 dead babies into a glass"
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Today the girl I have been texting this week mentioned she recently lost a lot of weight.

Well I found her Facebook and she isn't lying. Like 2 years ago she was fat, but she's hot now so it doesn't really matter.
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Thats a win for you bro
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I met a chick off Bumble, the first one to talk to me. She is 40 and I'm 31. She is pretty hot and I got her in bed on the second date. I hope things continue, she is awesome and I'd like to be with her.
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Can I hide my okcupid and cmb? As in I want to keep current chats but no new people to see me

Date lined up for tomorrow night.

I could also probably ask another girl out for Saturday but they both basically live in the same smaller city and I don't want a bartender to say something when he sees me back to back nights.
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Bought a 4 piece suit for our date tomorrow (brunch at a coffee shop) if I mess this up she will be my Great White Buffalo
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MacadamianNut3 posted...

Bought a 4 piece suit for our date tomorrow (brunch at a coffee shop) if I mess this up she will be my Great White Buffalo

Is this a joke?
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EnragedSlith posted...

MacadamianNut3 posted...

Bought a 4 piece suit for our date tomorrow (brunch at a coffee shop) if I mess this up she will be my Great White Buffalo

Is this a joke?

He's a man of class. A true gentleman
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Yeah, so this is a little silly, but...

The girl Ive been seeing really likes this ongoing comic called Saga. She wanted me to read it since Im tangentially into dorky shit and have read a few in my time.

Its... okay? Art direction is wonderfully creative and the writer seems to have a good feel for pacing out a story, but hes punching above his weight and using adult themes to masquerade it as a mature work. Its teenybop wrapping itself in sex and horrors of war tropes, reading like some fan fiction on deviantart. Couldve just made a simple space adventure.

I cant tell her that, right? Ive learned to keep this shit under wraps and my opinions to myself as far as girlfriends have been concerned, because nobody likes a snob. But maybe thats a mistake? Its not like pretending to not hate Big Bang Theory helped things with my ex.
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Went out with a girl from tinder last night.

She looked pretty much like her pictures (maybe 5% less hot).

Had some drinks.

Went to see a movie. Cuddled up doing the movie.

Then we made out for like an hour in the car and I finger banged her.

So...that's where were at.
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billcom6 posted...

Went out with a girl from tinder last night.

She looked pretty much like her pictures (maybe 5% less hot).

Had some drinks.

Went to see a movie. Cuddled up doing the movie.

Then we made out for like an hour in the car and I finger banged her.

So...that's where were at.

My man
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So I had my date and I think it went great. I just have one question: How much personal information does a girl need to have from a dude to have a legally binding restraining order made

She knows my first, middle, and last name, my phone number, the apartment building (but not room) I live in, and that I lived in Georgia and Alabama at some point
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Ugh shitshow last night with the friend-ex

Big drunken fight, stuff was thrown, tears were shed, words were exchanged

She was getting all pissy at me over the concept of other women (even though I dont have any)... ironically the main sore spot was this friend who was a sore spot in an earlier relationship, despite the fact that she lives on the other side of the country and I talk to her maybe once every six months

Meanwhile of course shes back on OkCupid and being a woman with a pulse has to put in no effort and has been on a bunch of dates in the last month.

I know I shouldnt. I know what advice Id give to someone else. I know this is just making it harder for me
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I had 4 different dates this week and took tonight off. I'm exhausted (though still chatting with people via text).

Thursday was probably the weirdest day I've had in a while. There is one girl who I met on Tinder about 3 years that I keep around as a FWB. She has an amazing body but gets on my nerves very easily. She's also the kind of girl who will text something nice, then, if I haven't replied in 10 minutes, will say "oh, I guess you don't care then." So I try to limit seeing her to about every other month or so.

On Thursday, she thought it would be hilarious to send cupcakes to my office that said "#metoo." I don't really know what the hell she was thinking, but I was pretty steamed that she looked up my office address and sent them there. Thankfully, no one else saw them, because I'm certain there would have been issues with that. That was just the start of the day, though.

That night, the specter of #metoo kind of popped up again, with an experience that reminded me of the Aziz Ansari story. I took this girl from the Jewish app out to dinner (3rd date) and we had a nice time, then went to this cocktail bar and got pretty wasted together. She invited me back to her place, she poured us each a scotch, and we started hooking up pretty shortly after that. Before much happened, she said "I don't want to have sex tonight." I was totally fine with this and was glad she was crystal clear -- unlike Aziz's bitch, there was no deciphering "non-verbal cues" or whatever, which was useful because she was definitely pretty drunk.

So we're hooking up and she gets increasingly turned on the longer it continues. Eventually, half jokingly/half seriously says, "maybe you can just put the tip in." I kind of laughed it off -- partly confused and partly curious if this is a green light or not -- but I kept coming back to the Aziz thing in my head for some reason. We moved from the living room into her bedroom and kept going at it, with waves of her getting extremely turned on and passionate. By now she was completely naked and being pretty loud. At one point she says to me, and I quote directly -- "I want you to ravage me." At this point I stopped being amused and just said "we'll do that next time," but she kept low-key pleading to do more.

By that time it was around 2:30am and I was both wasted and exhausted. I started dosing off and having these micro-dreams for a few seconds at a time while we were hooking up. For whatever reason, I had this song from Cuphead stuck in my head (song below). I hadn't played the game in a while, so I have no clue why.

I left shortly after that, and I'm still kind of annoyed about the different mixed signals she was giving. It'll be irrelevant after we sleep together next time, but this is the kind of shit that drives me crazy about these #metoo stories and the confusing situations guys often end up in.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9OK1aM68ac
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Why not just ask her if she's serious about wanting to have sex
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Also, that many dates in a week sounds tiring
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emblem boy posted...

Why not just ask her if she's serious about wanting to have sex

Because she had already said no before we would go any further, and I agreed we wouldn't that night. She was even drunker later on when she started asking for it.

Also, yes, tiring and very expensive. I spent $500 this week going out.
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I went on 5 dates this week. Super exhausting to be honest.

The first one we matched back in November but she left town because she didn't live here. She came back only recently. She was pretty much like her pics minus minor stache hair -_-. Anyways she kept saying she wanted to go for food. We ended up at a pricey resto and she made no effort to pay. I don't mind paying but no effort to pay is a no-no on my end. She offered to buy me a mcflurry in the end. It seemed like she had fun and I had some fun too. Anyways I dropped her off and said text me some time and told her if I never messaged in the time she was gone we would never have met up. She said "well guys usually do most of the work". Not feeling it, I never messaged her after. From tinder

Date 2 was also as cute as her pics. She was way too quiet. I got nothing out of her. The quietest girl I have ever met. I had to go questions like "what does your mom do?", that's how much material had run out. Luckily she came to my area. I was bored there in the time we were there. She liked basketball and I took my basketball knowledge to the maximum that date. Also didn't message her either but she did like some of my insta pics since. From coffee meets bagel

The third one was the youngest, 19 (18 is legal here). Went well actually. Very mature and felt bad when I offered to pay (she's only a student). she asked me out for a second date there and we had a make out session there. Actually cuter in person too. From tinder.

Went on this one OKC date. Meh, the bar was dark but she wasn't as attractive as her pics and slightly bulkier. She wasn't feeling it either from the sounds of it. she paid the date at least. If she messages I am down but other wise forget it. Kind of far too

I met one girl today and it went well. Conversation went well, all smiles on her end. She even said she was having fun. I enjoyed the date. She's from tinder. In her pics she was super hot but in person she was cute, though not as hot. I liked this one too. Let's see what happens

Exhausting though. Can't do this many dates

Blue_Popo posted...

Exhausting though. Can't do this many dates

How many of them are you going to follow up with?
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So I went out with some friends last night, had a good time, and now Im inspired to try OkCupid again

That fight the other day was emotionally exhausting and however things shake out with that girl its clear shes not ready for anything right now and theres no use sitting around waiting

But for now its back to SF for another two weeks
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Also Im using some new pics, what do yall think?




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TheGoldenEel posted...

Ugh shitshow last night with the friend-ex

Big drunken fight, stuff was thrown, tears were shed, words were exchanged

She was getting all pissy at me over the concept of other women (even though I dont have any)... ironically the main sore spot was this friend who was a sore spot in an earlier relationship, despite the fact that she lives on the other side of the country and I talk to her maybe once every six months

Meanwhile of course shes back on OkCupid and being a woman with a pulse has to put in no effort and has been on a bunch of dates in the last month.

I know I shouldnt. I know what advice Id give to someone else. I know this is just making it harder for me

This is the girl youre hurting over? Tell her to stop being stupid since she clearly has feelings for ya
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EnragedSlith posted...

TheGoldenEel posted...

Ugh shitshow last night with the friend-ex

Big drunken fight, stuff was thrown, tears were shed, words were exchanged

She was getting all pissy at me over the concept of other women (even though I dont have any)... ironically the main sore spot was this friend who was a sore spot in an earlier relationship, despite the fact that she lives on the other side of the country and I talk to her maybe once every six months

Meanwhile of course shes back on OkCupid and being a woman with a pulse has to put in no effort and has been on a bunch of dates in the last month.

I know I shouldnt. I know what advice Id give to someone else. I know this is just making it harder for me

This is the girl youre hurting over? Tell her to stop being stupid since she clearly has feelings for ya

No shit
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The Admiral posted...

Blue_Popo posted...

Exhausting though. Can't do this many dates

How many of them are you going to follow up with?

Well one asked me for a date 2 there and we have been talking since. The one from yesterday was cool. I am going to message her but haven't done so yet.

The other 3 I won't. I'm not interested but if they hit me up and sounds like they are down to bang, I'm down

TheGoldenEel posted...

Also Im using some new pics, what do yall think?

Brewers one is the best. I'd use that as the first pic. The garden pic is the second best.

Don't use the ones with the Misty guy or the trio pic, makes you look like a menlet. Do you have any pics where you're taller than the other people? If so, go with those.
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The Admiral posted...

TheGoldenEel posted...

Also Im using some new pics, what do yall think?

Brewers one is the best. I'd use that as the first pic. The garden pic is the second best.

Don't use the ones with the Misty guy or the trio pic, makes you look like a menlet. Do you have any pics where you're taller than the other people? If so, go with those.

This. You only need 4 pics. Besides the brewers one get rid of your other group pics

I am a Manlet though

It says right on my profile. I do like the Vegas pic because it does show me taller than the lady friend but shorter than the other guy (who is like 61

I agree that the Brewers pic is better but I have a beard right now and I feel like its false advertising if I dont have a beard pic first
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TheGoldenEel posted...

Also Im using some new pics, what do yall think?

I think youre a good looking guy. Id introduce you to one of my coworkers I have a feeling youd gel with if you lived in the area
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The Admiral posted...

I had 4 different dates this week and took tonight off. I'm exhausted (though still chatting with people via text).

Thursday was probably the weirdest day I've had in a while. There is one girl who I met on Tinder about 3 years that I keep around as a FWB. She has an amazing body but gets on my nerves very easily. She's also the kind of girl who will text something nice, then, if I haven't replied in 10 minutes, will say "oh, I guess you don't care then." So I try to limit seeing her to about every other month or so.

On Thursday, she thought it would be hilarious to send cupcakes to my office that said "#metoo." I don't really know what the hell she was thinking, but I was pretty steamed that she looked up my office address and sent them there. Thankfully, no one else saw them, because I'm certain there would have been issues with that. That was just the start of the day, though.

That night, the specter of #metoo kind of popped up again, with an experience that reminded me of the Aziz Ansari story. I took this girl from the Jewish app out to dinner (3rd date) and we had a nice time, then went to this cocktail bar and got pretty wasted together. She invited me back to her place, she poured us each a scotch, and we started hooking up pretty shortly after that. Before much happened, she said "I don't want to have sex tonight." I was totally fine with this and was glad she was crystal clear -- unlike Aziz's bitch, there was no deciphering "non-verbal cues" or whatever, which was useful because she was definitely pretty drunk.

So we're hooking up and she gets increasingly turned on the longer it continues. Eventually, half jokingly/half seriously says, "maybe you can just put the tip in." I kind of laughed it off -- partly confused and partly curious if this is a green light or not -- but I kept coming back to the Aziz thing in my head for some reason. We moved from the living room into her bedroom and kept going at it, with waves of her getting extremely turned on and passionate. By now she was completely naked and being pretty loud. At one point she says to me, and I quote directly -- "I want you to ravage me." At this point I stopped being amused and just said "we'll do that next time," but she kept low-key pleading to do more.

By that time it was around 2:30am and I was both wasted and exhausted. I started dosing off and having these micro-dreams for a few seconds at a time while we were hooking up. For whatever reason, I had this song from Cuphead stuck in my head (song below). I hadn't played the game in a while, so I have no clue why.

I left shortly after that, and I'm still kind of annoyed about the different mixed signals she was giving. It'll be irrelevant after we sleep together next time, but this is the kind of shit that drives me crazy about these #metoo stories and the confusing situations guys often end up in.

I realize that its in your head due to the news and a crazy woman almost ruining your life, but I think you were overthinking things. She didnt know what she wanted but then got turned on and probably would have been just fine if you fucked her bloody
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EnragedSlith posted...

Yeah, so this is a little silly, but...

The girl Ive been seeing really likes this ongoing comic called Saga. She wanted me to read it since Im tangentially into dorky shit and have read a few in my time.

Its... okay? Art direction is wonderfully creative and the writer seems to have a good feel for pacing out a story, but hes punching above his weight and using adult themes to masquerade it as a mature work. Its teenybop wrapping itself in sex and horrors of war tropes, reading like some fan fiction on deviantart. Couldve just made a simple space adventure.

I cant tell her that, right? Ive learned to keep this shit under wraps and my opinions to myself as far as girlfriends have been concerned, because nobody likes a snob. But maybe thats a mistake? Its not like pretending to not hate Big Bang Theory helped things with my ex.

Lol
Im completely honest about my opinions to my gf

She liked justice league
Straight up told her I thought it sucked
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So I just sent a bunch of messages and learned that you cant even see sent messages anymore on OkCupid?

How is it that every single change theyve made over the past couple years has made it worse?
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TheGoldenEel posted...

So I just sent a bunch of messages and learned that you cant even see sent messages anymore on OkCupid?

How is it that every single change theyve made over the past couple years has made it worse?

bumblllllllle
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My girlfriend lets me bite her butt whenever I want and its nice
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billcom6 posted...

Went out with a girl from tinder last night.

She looked pretty much like her pictures (maybe 5% less hot).

Had some drinks.

Went to see a movie. Cuddled up doing the movie.

Then we made out for like an hour in the car and I finger banged her.

So...that's where were at.

You....finger banged her?

Nice?
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Blue_Inigo posted...

billcom6 posted...

Went out with a girl from tinder last night.

She looked pretty much like her pictures (maybe 5% less hot).

Had some drinks.

Went to see a movie. Cuddled up doing the movie.

Then we made out for like an hour in the car and I finger banged her.

So...that's where were at.

You....finger banged her?

Nice?

I mean there are limited options in a not very secluded parking lot.
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EnragedSlith posted...

TheGoldenEel posted...

So I just sent a bunch of messages and learned that you cant even see sent messages anymore on OkCupid?

How is it that every single change theyve made over the past couple years has made it worse?

bumblllllllle

Ive always had far better results on OkCupid

Anyway I believe bumble uses location data and since Im spending two weeks out of town I cant really use it
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I think it's going to end soon. She just seems to be fed up feeling like she likes me more than I like her. Which I guess is true, since she's dropped the L word and I haven't. And she can tell I have doubts about the relationship, the future, etc. And she doesn't want to waste her time.
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She's looking for an emblem man, not an emblem boy.

DoctorPiranha3 posted...

She's looking for an emblem man, not an emblem boy.

Probably. I don't want to end it with her but if I'm not giving her what she needs, then I guess I should.
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emblem boy posted...

DoctorPiranha3 posted...

She's looking for an emblem man, not an emblem boy.

Probably. I don't want to end it with her but if I'm not giving her what she needs, then I guess I should.

What are you afraid of? What's keeping you from adjusting your behavior to give her the emotional support that she needs?

I get that she's the first romantic lady in your life, so this might be new territory. But if you really like her and don't want to end it, why not invest more emotionally?

Well, looks like I might be on the market again.

My girl liked me more when I wasn't into her and thought of her more as a FWB, but when I go into relationship mode, she liked me less.

Wtf? Being douche is key, i suppose
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DoctorPiranha3 posted...

emblem boy posted...

DoctorPiranha3 posted...

She's looking for an emblem man, not an emblem boy.

Probably. I don't want to end it with her but if I'm not giving her what she needs, then I guess I should.

What are you afraid of? What's keeping you from adjusting your behavior to give her the emotional support that she needs?

I get that she's the first romantic lady in your life, so this might be new territory. But if you really like her and don't want to end it, why not invest more emotionally?

I actually thought I was. I recently read that 5 love languages book and I think I'm doing fine in regards to those things. And she's said so as well.

The things I'm scared of are things like telling her I love her or committing too much when I'm not sure how I totally feel.

And me just having doubts about the future because of things I might not like about her. And that's why she has doubts. She brought up love, I rejected her. She brought up moving in together, I pretty much rejected that, at least for the next few months.
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krazychao5 posted...

Well, looks like I might be on the market again.

My girl liked me more when I wasn't into her and thought of her more as a FWB, but when I go into relationship mode, she liked me less.

Wtf? Being douche is key, i suppose

Immaturity. People want what they cant have.

emblem boy posted...

I think it's going to end soon. She just seems to be fed up feeling like she likes me more than I like her. Which I guess is true, since she's dropped the L word and I haven't. And she can tell I have doubts about the relationship, the future, etc. And she doesn't want to waste her time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9CYfsQrNtFk

Do what you gotta
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krazychao5 posted...

Well, looks like I might be on the market again.

My girl liked me more when I wasn't into her and thought of her more as a FWB, but when I go into relationship mode, she liked me less.

Wtf? Being douche is key, i suppose

She crazy
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Its kinda funny dating hottest girl at a party

You can tell all the guys wanna smash dat but Im the alpha of the pack

They also dont wanna hit on her because they know Im a boxer cause she brags about it

So basically Im hittin dat and they cant do shit about it because Im like One Punch Man
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gna647 posted...

Its kinda funny dating hottest girl at a party

You can tell all the guys wanna smash dat but Im the alpha of the pack

They also dont wanna hit on her because they know Im a boxer cause she brags about it

So basically Im hittin dat and they cant do shit about it because Im like One Punch Man

Might be that most people respect the boundaries of a relationship rather than the threat of an overcompensating midget getting in their face
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