Current Events > Young Chinese failing to meet Army standards due to 'too much fapping'

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A rising number of young Chinese people are failing fitness tests required to join the army because they are too fat and masturbate too much, state media has proclaimed.

The high rejection rate has triggered concerns that there are not enough youths in good physical condition to fill the ranks of the Chinese army.

A poor diet and frequent masturbation, leading to abnormally large testicular veins, are believed to be behind falling fitness levels, according to a report published in state-run military newspaper the People’s Liberation Army Daily.

Authorities also think the constant use of smartphones and drinking water with too high a mineral content are to blame.

In one city, 56.9 per cent of potential recruits were rejected after failing fitness tests. One in five was simply deemed too fat.


The report claimed 8 per cent of male candidates suffered from enlarged testicular veins. “This is related to sitting too long on computer games, excessive masturbation and too little physical activity,” it said.

Some 46 per cent were rejected for failing the vision test, with the excessive use of electronic gadgets such as smartphones and tablets blamed.

The report claimed 8 per cent

Good. Fuck armies