Current Events > How does one get over the fear of rejection?

(+) Yeah! (+)

I've decided to try to overcome my fear of rejection, but sometimes it's still hard to ignore.
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Get told no a lot
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Get rejected. You'll soon discover that it really doesn't feel like anything.
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Get rejected
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DezCaughtIt posted...

Get told no a lot

This is true.
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Stop giving a fuck about what you believe other people think about you and speak like you're someone who's confident with yourself.

Also don't overthink what you're going to say. There's room to mess up a little, so don't let it shake you up. It can even be cute sometimes.

The worst that can happen is they can say no. If they do, oh well. There's always next time.
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Thanks guys for the advice! I guess I'll just slug it out....
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getting rejected pretty much feels like nothing, unless you overhype it and make it feel like something.

Go up and talk to a girl. She doesn't seem interested. Walk off. Never think or care about it again.
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Steve Nick posted...

getting rejected pretty much feels like nothing, unless you overhype it and make it feel like something.

Go up and talk to a girl. She doesn't seem interested. Walk off. Never think or care about it again.

Yeah...guess I'll have to slug it out. Thank you.
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You can go to a bar and get rejected by like 10 girls in one night if you really want.

Maybe one won't even reject you, who knows.

Another thing to remember is, for girls, they -want- to reject guys. It makes them feel good. A girl rejecting you means almost nothing. It could be for any reason in the world. It says nothing about you.
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DezCaughtIt posted...

Get told no a lot

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i mean there was really only one answer to this question
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Steve Nick posted...

You can go to a bar and get rejected by like 10 girls in one night if you really want.

Maybe one won't even reject you, who knows.

Another thing to remember is, for girls, they -want- to reject guys. It makes them feel good. A girl rejecting you means almost nothing. It could be for any reason in the world. It says nothing about you.

Yeah I suppose. Thanks again for the encouragement!
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There's really no way to get over rejection. I always get rejected. Either I get put in the friendzone, ignored, treated like shit, get overlooked for other guys, etc. I've never been successful with girls. Even so much as a date. I take it very personally. I get offended. I start to over analyze things. And question what's wrong with me. I start to think that the girl is a stuck up bitch and I'm not good enough for her. It's made me bitter and I'm starting to believe that all girls care about are a guy's looks and how much money he has.
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Tadamoto12 posted...

There's really no way to get over rejection. I always get rejected. Either I get put in the friendzone, ignored, treated like shit, get overlooked for other guys, etc. I've never been successful with girls. Even so much as a date. I take it very personally. I get offended. I start to over analyze things. And question what's wrong with me. I start to think that the girl is a stuck up bitch and I'm not good enough for her. It's made me bitter and I'm starting to believe that all girls care about are a guy's looks and how much money he has.

That sucks. I'm sorry to hear that.
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After your first rejection it gets better and easier each time
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Realize that rejection doesn't matter. If you get rejected then you just end up right back where you were before you took a chance. Your situation doesn't change at all, so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

The more you get rejected

The more you release it doesn't change anything

The sun will still rise etc

It's sucky at the beginning, when you still have that fear

But it'll get better :)
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Have a sense of humor about it. Most of time time stories of rejection are pretty funny. Also realize you're really not that important or special so being rejected isn't devastating, sort of expected.

It's also far worse to be accepted by someone and you realize they're annoying and they won't leave you alone. Be careful what you wish for.

Fear is based on the unknown. What if she doesn't like me? What if she says something mean?

Frankly, I got over my fear of rejection by convincing myself that it was inevitable. At that point I was more getting something off my chest than anything, which is always a relief.

Thst was more than 12 years ago. Our fifth anniversary is coming up next month.
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Feline_Heart posted...

Realize that rejection doesn't matter. If you get rejected then you just end up right back where you were before you took a chance. Your situation doesn't change at all, so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

It lowers your self-esteem a bit each time you get rejected. Until you don't have any left.
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Tadamoto12 posted...

Feline_Heart posted...

Realize that rejection doesn't matter. If you get rejected then you just end up right back where you were before you took a chance. Your situation doesn't change at all, so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

It lowers your self-esteem a bit each time you get rejected. Until you don't have any left.

Doesn't have to if you're not expecting anything in the first place. It is a little stupid to go into every human interaction thinking you're just going to floor the other person, before even having the experience. Dating is entirely dependent on living in the moment with no expectations. Any other approach and you're going to be ball busted.

Tadamoto12 posted...

Feline_Heart posted...

Realize that rejection doesn't matter. If you get rejected then you just end up right back where you were before you took a chance. Your situation doesn't change at all, so you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

It lowers your self-esteem a bit each time you get rejected. Until you don't have any left.

If you're at that point then you can't possibly go any lower, right? So you have nothing to lose