Board 8 > Arria played Umineko again (blind) (play/readthrough) SPOILERS WELCOME

(+) Yeah! (+)

Kinzo is in his study mumbling to himself
A: This kids is why nursing homes exist

Kinzo goes on about how a clock never reaches hour 24, but he will and that is the Golden Land!
A: Anyone else feels like half of this is Beatrice trying to make sure her creepy stalker cant get to her in her own house? Like, this is just a survival horror story for her? Shes boarding up the walls and calling the cops. I have a gun!

A: Is he about to do what I think hes going to do?
K: What do you think hes going to do?
A: Is he going to kill a bunch of people to hedge his bets
K: Would he want to do that? He wants to both increase and decrease his chances. The more people left alive, the better his chances of survival. But if he decreases it so that only one or two people are left alive, then the magic will be stronger
A: Maybe thats his goal. Hell kill four of his servants so that theres only one person left alive at the end of the 13 murders. Hell only have a 1 in 14 chance of being the sole survivor, but the magic will be much stronger that way.

Ronove and Genji speak to each other
A: Look! They spoke! Porn can be written of them now! Thats all a fandom needs
K (thinking): Ronove is Genji, in a way. So wouldnt that be self-cest?

A: If Ronove is an old friend of Genjis, and Ronove is a demon, does that mean Genji is a demon?
K: Interpret it as you will
---

Eerieka posted...

A: Look! They spoke! Porn can be written of them now! Thats all a fandom needs

I feel like Arria is underestimating fandoms here

lol true. To be fair, I think she has some pairings for characters in different series, sooo...

then again, one of my favorite ships pairs a character from Soul Eater with a character from Zetsubou-sensei, so I'm not one to talk...
---

I warn Arria about a jump scare (in her opinion) in which Kinzo gets fried. She was glad I warned her. The Steam version doesnt have the moving picture and its not as sudden as it was in the version I saw earlier, but it still would have been a jump scare for her.

A: Mm-mm, Kentucky Fried Kinzo. Finger-Lickin good!
K: *hesitate a moment* He has six toes. Im trying to find a way to fit that in
A: Mm-mm, six-toes-lickin good
K: If youre eating food with your toes, you might be doing it wrong
A: (reads lyrics from Cathouse Tragedy) And if you wanna / Shell peel your banana / Shes bloody good with her feet!
K: Oh Christ

Genji and Kanon are just being weird
A: Its amazing how a man can go through life without either balls or a spine
A: This has stopped being murder. We are heading toward execution territory.

Kanon says he wants to be a human
A: Wow, how the turns have tabled
K: Oh man, that was good
A: I dont remember where I got that from
K: Its so appropriate here!
---

Kanon and Lucifer fight
A: I like that her blade is purple

Beatrice in the metaworld: Isnt this fun, Battler?
A: You need professional help
Beatrice: Look! Look! Its magic! Its furniture!
A: I have a feeling shes trying to sell a shamwow. We got your magic! We got your furniture! We got it all! $19.99! She has become Billy Mays! Or the shamwow guy, whatever his name was. I dont even know what a shamwow was!
K: Neither do I! I was about to ask you!
So then we have to look up shamwow (its a washcloth) and that leads to looking up the guy who sells it, finding a hilarious image of him that is begging to be edited (this is my handiwork, 10 minutes in Paint: ), then Billy Mays, then cocaine, then fuck it, weve gotten off topic. Back to Umineko!
A: Okay. Shamwow, Kentucky Friend Kinzo. We got it all out of our system.
K: Lets go!

Beatrice goes nuts laughing and claiming its all fantasy
A: One, I think Sayaka Ohara pulled something there. Two, does Japanese not have a word for fantasy?
K: In this case, theyre talking about the fantasy genre of video games/books, so they use the European/American word. But in regards to things like hallucinations or imagination, they have their own word. Theres genso as seen in Touhous Gensokyo, which is sorta-kinda Fantasy Land and the game series Gensosuikoden which is Fantasy Water Margin.

Beatrice says something about humans can become terrifying because they can grow stronger, and even become a witch that turns demons in butlers
A: This sounds relevant. Both to this and the whole no Naku Koro ni series
K: True

Kanon and Lucifer continue to fight. The screen flashes with various colors
A: Will one of you win already before I get a seizure!
Lucifer screams
A: And her voice actress just pulled something, too
I look up who Lucifers VA was, and its a girl who hasnt been in much. She played a few minor roles in anime wed seen, but we couldnt recall those characters voices.
A: Maybe thats why she doesnt VA much. She pulled something with that scream
---

Now you made me sad there will never be any more proper Suikoden games ;-;

I know that feel ;_; Suikoden was a magical series. I loved all the numbered ones (except for 4, but does anyone like 4?) To this day, 5 holds a special place in my heart because I believed it would end in one of two ways: it would either end the way I thought it would end which I wouldn't like, or it would end semi-happily but still make concessions that I didn't like. The actual ending was better than any scenario I had imagined, and I have to give major props to the writers for that.
---

Kanon wins
A: Ah, but Beatrice said you had to beat the SEVEN Sisters of Purgatory! Now fight the other six!
Beatrice tosses Lucifer around, then trolls Kanon. I said you had to fight the Seven Sisters of Purgatory!
Arria gave me a sly fuckin I knew it look
K: You called that one!
A: ALWAYS check your wording with magical creatures
A: Also, I love this polka music in the background (the song is Nighteyes)
K: I associate polka with happy music
A: This song sounds happy!
K: Maybe? Maybe I just associate Nighteyes with creepy Umineko witchy moments
We then listen to some polka songs for a while to get an idea what polka really means
A: I dont even know. Im shit with music. I just said the first word that came to mind
K: Its fine. I got your meaning.

A: Anyone get the feeling that the other stakes are gonna tie up Lucifer and spank her later?
K: I dont think youre far wrong. Lucifer pretends to be the best stake, being the oldest, but when she inevitably fails, the other sisters bully her.
Then she wanted me to look up pictures of the other stakes bullying Lucifer, but I only found one good one. >_> Ill look some more later. It was just a cursory search.

The stakes try to break Shannons barrier
A: Memo to myself. Never play Umineko if I think I might be developing epilepsy

Beatrice goes off on Shannon and says its all useless!
A: Shes becoming Battler. How cute!

Genji mercifully kills Shannon
A: I really do like Genji
---

Ah, Genji the best.
---

Oh hey, Daydreams End plays again.

Beatrice: its fun to pop the balloon of life so it forcefully explodes!
A: Fuck you, Beatrice.
(Arria really does not like balloons. She has a clown phobia and balloons sorta as a result)

Ronove mentions that Genji was his greatest servant
A: Wait, so is he Ronoves minion? Or student?

Gohda stands in front of the portrait and whispers a Shinto-type prayer
A: You are making shit life choices right now, Gohda
Gohda goes into the kitchen
A: To meet with Gluttony
A: Is one of the stakes literally hiding in a kettle?
Game: Gohda acted bold, but he was actually quite timid
A: This is cute. Add this to a tick on the list of Gohda isnt quite so bad!
The game has the text *clank* repeated a bunch of times
A: I thought it would have just a screen of *clank*
Beelze, Mammon, and Leviathan appear, and she correctly guesses each of their sins. Good job, Arria!

As I was typing the above, Arria got to the part with Kumasawa. She erects a barrier
A: Oh! Is she furniture? *looks at her portrait* She doesnt wear the bird, that we can see. But she wears a long-ass apron-thing. Could be underneath.
A: Is Kumasawa the old Beatrice?
Damnit, she wont continue without a response! All I say is to keep reading
A: WAS I RIGHT THAT SHES A FUCKING SHINIGAMI?
I laugh
Then Beatrice announces that this was the original Beatrice.
I remind Arria about how she said in the last session that she kept disregarding Kumasawa and would laugh her ass off if and when she became relevant
We have a good time laughing about the times shes called things in the past, but I didnt let her know until it was revealed. Not just in Umineko, but other works of fiction as well.
A: I was not expecting Kumasawa to be relevant now or ever!
---

Ever?! Mackerel is super relevant!!!
---

Oh boy, if I bring up mackerel again, Arria will want to get mackerel sushi lol.
---

A: Again, youre not helping me with the whole nobody gets out of a magical apprenticeship safely thing. It might be tomorrow, it might be a hundred years, it might be a million years. Someday, youre going to be on the wrong end of a magic missile and youll look back and say what mistake did I make in my life? oh yeah, becoming a teacher!

A: Ive gotta say, this is completely shocking to me. Like, Kumasawa is now something else than someone to get killed in the twilights!

And here we go, magic fight
K: Aww yeah, Fake Red Shoes. I love this song

Three Beatrices appear
A: Thats gonna haunt my nightmares

A: I gotta say it is awfully convenient that you were all women! Could you imagine if she was teaching a boy? We have the Golden Witch (name of my boyfriend)!
K: Hah, yeah, that might be troubling!
(Its also what happened regarding Yasu)
A: Are there any male witches?
(Shit shit shit how do I answer this? Ah, fuck it, Ill just be vague about it)
K: Throughout Ryukishis works, he refers to female magic-users as majo/witches, and male magic-users as majutsushi/sorcerers.
(I actually couldnt remember off hand what Battlers title was, but I thought majutsushi sounded right)

Battler: I have no fucking idea whats going on
A: I agree! I agree so much! I think Battler needs to go in another room and hyperventilate in a paper bag. Like, the train has gone off the rails and is speeding through the forest and were like it can do that?
---

Battler is referred to as the Endless Sorcerer yeah

Though Lambda does call him the Golden Witch once before correcting herself.

Yeah, I remembered him being called the Endless Sorcerer, but I couldn't remember what Japanese word they used. Since I initially played it without voices, I didn't have that memory to fall back on.
---

A: Currently, Im concerned why Beatrice is summoning Chinese apartment buildings in the center of the rose garden.

A: I think right now, Battler is doing this. Sherlock did this, too! *mimicks snorting cocaine*

A: I think Ryukishi is throwing words together without any context or meaning

A: I feel like whats really happening is this. Beatrice is walking in the garden and she comes across Kumasawa in one of Kinzos old dresses. Then shes about to kill her when Kumasawa says Hey, before you kill me, why dont we play some Magic the Gathering for old times sake!?
(note: Arria actually said Kinzos wifes old dress but I misheard her, and when I asked for clarification, she thought it was funnier to go with just Kinzos old dress)

The spear with smothered mate appears and I explain what that is. I remind her that I am by no means a chess expert and I only knew that because of Umineko (having looked it up 9 or whatever years ago when I played ep 3)

Theres not a lot of commentary for the rest of the battle and Beatrices resulting trolling. Shes just in awe and enjoying it at the same time, once I told her to just sit back and enjoy the magical bullshit. She agreed that it was awesome regarding all the mythological references. She especially liked the horsemen of the apocalypse/Odin combination that happened at the end.
---

Day 14 (10/03/17)

Thus starts our day of 'celebration' of a fictional murder... a day before the actual anniversary fictionally. Look, we tried, alright? ;_;

Rudolf says that at least it is raining and not spears from the sky
A: Thank you for that, Rudolf. At least we dont have Gilgamesh here
K: This did just happen in the witches magic duel
A: Oh yeah, that scene where Battler did drugs. I remember that!

Krauss mentions the mystery 19th person
A: Oh you have no idea.

A: One of these times, I think it would be interesting if all the kids died first and it was the parents fumbling around in the dark.
K: That would also bring up the drama of parents losing their kids
A: I dont think Beatrice would do that, though. The kids bring energy that the parent dont have. Also, I dont think itll happen, but I think it would be crazy is Battler were the first to die. Like, he starts to wisen up that he needs to see things for it to count, so Beatrice just kills him. Screw you! You dont get to watch my magic show this time!

The parents mention a bad smell
Hideyoshi: what is that smell?
A: Even I know what rotting fresh smells like. Well, its still early. It might just be feces right now.
We talk for a moment about being in a cadaver room. Since I just graduated with a biology degree, Ive spent my fair share of time around dead bodies. I told her that the university is good about keeping things smelling nice. The cadavers room basically smells like a hospital with all the chemicals they use to keep the bodies from going bad.
A: Oh yeah, and they roasted Kinzo, didnt they?
K: Kentucky Fried Kinzo, remember?
A: And shamderp. *snorts* Thanks for that picture, by the way.
(shes referring to the 5-minutes-in-Paint picture I did to edit just wow next to the shamwow guy)
---

Arria was already laughing about a text she got regarding work, and then she clicks forward to where Natsuhi mentions getting Genji to handle things, and she started laughing even louder.
A: I dont know why this is as funny as it is. A bunch of grown-ass adults acting like children. Props to Beatrice for setting up the game board like this
Krauss: Hard to imagine Gohda would make a breakfast with such an odor
A: Krauss lives in his own special place, doesnt he? Surprise motherfucker! Breakfast is haggis and 1000 year eggs!
And then we have to watch the surprise motherfucker compilation based on the scene from Dexter.
Then we also have to look up 1000 year eggs to see how its made, and I make the mistake of saying at least its not maggot cheese so now shes looking up how they make casu marzu (maggot cheese). Eww
A: You know how Americans will have their relatives in the south that were embarrassed by? This is the Italian equivalent of that! Italy has a lot to answer for!
(She has a thing for Italy that I dont pretend to understand. I think she will be amused when she learns that the original Beatrice was Italian)
A: Also, I love cheese. I never though I would find a cheese that I would refuse to eat. I stand corrected!

Back to Seacats, the adults go to the boiler room
A: Okay, answer me this. And if the answer is yes, you may need to cheat sheet something for me. Is the layout of the mansion important?
K: Not really. If something is relevant, theyll tell you in red. Like, if something is on the third floor and jumping off is unlikely, theyll talk about it. Although there was one thing about the boiler room that I think Ryukishi counted on us forgetting about
A: It has two entrances?
K: (oh shit she remembered) Exactly. In ep 1, when Kanon died, they came in through an entrance in the mansion, but Battler mentioned seeing a door to the courtyard swinging open and he left through that door
A: And didnt Shannon have to use an alternate entrance when she left to find the cobweb?
K: I dont recall, but possibly.

We get magic circles on the rooms
A: I dont know if you can answer this or not, but is this blood or just paint?
K: I think its just paint.
A: I thought so too. If it was blood, it would take quite a while to drain the bodies
K: Yeah, I think the bodies were just spiked. I dont think they were cut in half or anything like that to make the process faster. I doubt theyre completely exsanguinated
A little bit later the game outright calls it paint, so we feel validated
---

A: Ah, so they killed all the servants. And all the servants had a master key.
K: Right.
A: So the closed room thing is about how all the servants are locked in with their key. My working theory will be that they snuck the key through the bottom of the door.
Thatll get smashed early on, but Ill let Arria have that belief for now.

A: I like the idea that Battler did it. Hes dragging an unconscious Genji in one hand, bucket of paint in the other, then comes across Kyrie. Uh, hi! I can explain! I dont even want to know

Suspicion starts to play
A: Was this Fishy Aroma?
K: No, this was Suspicion. The one all the anime watchers hate. This one was Fishy Aroma *I play it* It also has a vocal version *I play the vocal version*
A: I like it!
I mention that she asked about Suspicion a few sessions ago and she didnt like it
A: I feel like its the techno version of a Sherlock Holmes moment where everyone is sneaking around. It has its purpose here.

Eva and Natsuhi have a pissing match in front of Beatrices portrait
A: I like the juxtaposition here. Nice art direction. You have these two losing their minds between Beatrice smiling down on them.

The adults go looking for keys in the servants quarters
A: Lemme guess, the servants had ALL the keys.
---

Eerieka posted...

Thatll get smashed early on, but Ill let Arria have that belief for now.

It should have already.

It's like one of the first scenes in Ep3 (after the flashback) where Lucifer says that "In all of Rokkenjima, there are no doors under which a key can fit" or something

Granted the rest of the red text for that specific mystery will also smash it, though.

That's true. I think we forgot about that one, since it was mentioned in a previous reading session.
---

Game: Hideyoshi and Nanjo returned
A: Hey guys, Im back from walking the walrus. He ate a crab. Is that normal? Also, why did I have to walk him? Its Kinzos walrus!

A: I like how theyre splitting up more in this episode. I mean, theyre fucked, but it makes things interesting! Were Scooby-Doo-ing this shit. Lets see, Krauss is Fred. Which makes Natsuhi Daphne. Rudolf is Shaggy. Rosa is Velma, quiet and unassuming. Kyrie is Scooby, the useful dog. Eva is Scrappy, cuz nobody likes that bitch. Hideyoshi is whatever random Harlem Globetrotter character was brought in this week.

Rudolf: What if Maria-chans letter was the announcement of the game?
A: Wow you guys are slow. Were you paying attention during dinner?
Rudolf: What about the magic circles we found?
A: I could see Kinzo doing this. Painting the creepy circles on the doors. Then taking his servants and playing chess with them for a few days while his numbnut kids try to figure this shit out.

Eva asks how many servants there were, and Natsuhi has her pained headache sprite while trying to remember.
A: Its like the TV shows you see in the Victorian era where the rich noble lady cant remember her own servants names. Lets just call everyone Perkins!

Five magic circles: the boiler, the parlor. Where else did they look? Arria couldnt remember what else was referred to as having a magic circle on it.

Rudolf smashes the window to the parlor
A: Bullet-proof glass?
It breaks
A: Oh, I didnt think it would be that easy
---

A: I expect something gruesome. I am fully expecting someone to be crucified. Or just pieces everywhere
Its surprisingly tame
A: Im almost disappointed, but also somewhat relieved.

We go to the metaworld and Beatrice calls for Battler who is practically in a fetal position under the table
A: I can imagine it like shes calling for her dog. Here boy! Here Battler!
(Arrias dog looks up and raises an eyebrow)
A: Aww, not you, honey. Youre a Brutus, not a Battler!

Battler screams about stuff being bullshit. A red shield appears while hes screaming
A: Did you just break him until he learned to control the Force?

Theres a mention of a signing ceremony of his surrender lol. Well I know how THAT turns out.

A: Oh, this is the piece-Battler didnt see it, therefore its not real epiphany, isnt it?
K: yeah, pretty much

Virgilia appears in her little corner of the Metaverse.
A: So this isnt the piece version of this woman? The one that had the magic battle?
K: Right, this is her Metaverse version. What we saw was, as you put it, probably Kumasawa asking Beatrice to play Magic the Gathering for old times sake.
---

Virgilia and Battler have a neat conversation about science and magic. I forgot how smart Battler is about random ass things. When rain dances comes up, Arria says I think every civilization has had a rain dance. Then Battler talks about the science behind it. This makes sense.

And then we get to Schrdingers Cat.
A: I do love thought experiment stuff like this.
K: Me too. Oh yeah, you heard Monty Hall died? I liked his thing
She hadnt heard of Monty Hall, so we talked about his problem for a bit. Its easier to explain if there are a million doors and 999,999 goats, so I go to that explanation and work my way to just 3 doors.
Did Umineko ever talk about the Monty Hall problem? I feel like itd be fun since Umineko already has goats, but it may have never had the opportunity. I know Zero Escape had a Monty Hall puzzle in it.

Talk about Braun Tubes. This is a good explanation!

Then she says that Battler lost an argument once before, and Battler gets this look of oh yeah, that was fun
A: Methinks Battler is thinking about how he wants Beatrice naked and on her knees.

Virgilia announces her name
A: Is this a reference to something?
K: Shell say in like, another sentence
Virgilia: I am your guide to Beatrice on Mount Purgatorio
A: Oh right, because everything is a fucking reference to Dantes Inferno.
---

Yes, the Monty Hall problem is one of the quiz questions in Episode 8. The last one barring Battler's end game one, I think.

Oh, nice! I don't remember any individual questions, but I do remember how cute that scene was. Then again, I just thought it was precious seeing the family being a happy family for once.
---

Back to the island
We get a new background. It says that this is the lobby of the guesthouse. One wall practically one big glass window
A: My inner tactician is angry. Theres a murderer running around and you are sitting in a room with one massive ass fucking window
We talk about how we hadnt seen this background before, and I dont know if this room is canonically supposed to have a window that large in it.
A: Well Im going with the idea that the art is accurate until proven otherwise
K: Fair enough. Its how you argued the existence of Kuwadorian.
A: I mean, its metagaming, but this is a game all about metagaming!

Rudolf has a gun
A: Oh hey, Rudolf has the gun today!
K: So are you happy Rudolf has survived this long
A: Yes! And Kyrie too! Im pleased with the first twilight in this episode!

Then Krauss appears with a gun
A: that is a tiny ass gun
*she switches to the original sprites*
A: Dear god. *laughs* Never look at the faces.
K: The hands are worse, imo. Ryukishi knows he cant draw hands so he avoids it whenever possible
We can see Krausss hands holding the gun in the original sprite and its so bad

Then we get Natsuhi, Kyrie, and Eva. I ask her to go to the original sprites here, too, because one of Natsuhis original-sprite faces is ingrained in my head as the ultimate Ive had enough of this shit face and I think its here. Sure enough. Arria then laughs about how it looks like Natsuhi and Kyrie are both ashamed of something Eva has done and shes trying to say it wasnt her fault. I wasnt the one that farted, you guys! It was the walrus!
---

Natsuhi questions why Kinzo would find a fake body with six toes
A: Because hes fucking nuts! And nuts and fucking!
Hideyoshi basically agrees with Arria
A: See! Even he knows!

She noticed that Kinzo burns to death in each scenario.
A: If I had to finger one of the 18- *realizes what she said* If I had to say one of the 18 did it, Im saying he did. Hes getting a fake corpse and burning it to the point of it not being recognized.
K: Youre keying in on an important aspect. Things that are the same in every episode. These will lead you to the truth
A: What else is there? They have never solved the epitaph, or even tried. George has always proposed to Shannon, and Shannon has always accepted.

We get updates on the corpses and she read them
K: Have we been updated on the order they found the bodies?
A: Shannon was first, but other than that no

Because I know Shannon was first and Kanon was last, so Yasu could do the ol run and get changed and switch what person hes pretending to be. I dont know if Umineko is going to specify that Kanon was the last to be found. Its kinda presumable since he was in the chapel and they mentioned finding five other magic circles in the mansion. But I wont point this out to Arria.
---

A: the stakes appear in all episodes. But whether theyre real or not is debatable. Did piece-Battler see them?
K: You mean the actual physical stakes or the demon girls?
A: the stakes. Like, he saw them in bodies previous, right?
K: Yeah, he saw Hideyoshis narwhal horn and some others.
A: (scornfully) The demon girls come on, Kira. Give me some credit here! Ive learned some lessons the game is giving me!
K: *cackle*

A: The telephones are always broken. I dont know if thats a plot point, or just to isolate the island
K: Probably both.

A: Also, they keep using the scorpion charm
We talk for a moment about scorpions in fiction and magic rituals. I mention a fantasy book series I read a while ago (Godspeaker triology) in which they use a lot of scorpion stuff in their religious/magic rituals, including a trial by fire thing where they put the defendant in a pit of scorpions to determine their innocence. She replied to that with I am innocent, but fuck that, Ill take execution!

We come back to Virgilia helping out Battler
Arria comes back to the theory that Kinzo is doing everything then burning a body double. She seems very stuck on this. She asks me to repeat what Beatrice said in red earlier about the number of bodies.
There are no more than 18 people on this Rokkenjima She thinks the key to this is that it doesnt count corpses as people. I told her that its true. There could be any number of dead people on the island. There could be a fucking graveyard somewhere and it wouldnt affect the number of living breathing bodies.
I know that the thing about bodies vs. living people is sorta brought up in episode 6 with the whole even if you join us, there are only 17 people thing that Battler and Beato use to shut down Erika. I dont remember if/when it comes up any earlier.
---

Battler: As if Id fall for the same trick every time!
A: I think that is literally the plot summary of the last few episodes. You have literally fallen for her tricks again and again. You have hit Wile E. Coyote levels of falling for the same shit twice.

Dancing Pipe plays as Virgilia lays out the crime scenes. This is a pretty rockin song. On a side note, Arria had to take a break to do something irl, but she left the game and its music on so Ive been rocking out to this song for like, 5 minutes now.

Beatrice: Closed room refers to a room where the inside and the outside are completely cut off from each other. Naturally, it will be impossible to even affect things across that boundary line, much less enter or escape across it. This includes an all-inclusive denial of the existence of hidden doors, as well as all possibility of intervention from the outside. Henceforth this shall be referred to as Beatrices Closed Room Definition.

Battler: How do you define all possibility of intervention from the outside?

Beatrice: I refer to all types of direct intervention from the outside, such as using a fishing line or a long, thin rod. In conclusion, there are no gaps in the doors and windows through which such tricks will work

she explains more details. At the end of which, Arria says The game is reminding me that Im an idiot. So much for that idea about them shoving something under the door!

A: Is this going to be a corpse scavenger hunt?
K: Can you visualize the visual theyre gonna use yet?
A: I think I see where theyre going with this
Game explains more
A: Is the last one going to take them to Kinzos room? It had some weird-ass mechanism on it, didnt it?
K: Check the profiles. I dont think anyone died in Kinzos room.
---

A: Have I mentioned lately that Beatrice has a flair for the dramatic?

Beatrice says something in red that Arria was about to suggest
A: Well thank you for stomping on that already popped balloon.

Virgilia tells Battler that Nanjo did a diagnosis on all the bodies and confirmed them dead. Was Nanjo an accomplice here? If Shannon/Kanon was faking his death, Nanjo would know. Or did Nanjo not do an autopsy and Virgilia is fucking with him?

Beatrice says in red the six who are dead. Then that they died instantly. Since I know what she really means, it kinda makes me mad. Like its a lot of mental gymnastics. I guess Shannon and Kanon as personalities DID die instantly in Yasus heart, but man. I dont like it.

Come to think of it, are Shannon and Kanon ever really alive from the get-go? They were Sayos servant names and shes technically been the head of the family now for, what, two years? Does she really think of herself as a servant anymore? I wonder if this could be another Kinzo is dead thing where its like yeah, but hes been dead for two years.
---

Beatrice pouts for a bit, trying to be cute.
A: Oh stop acting like a five year old!

Current hypothesis by Arria: Kinzo ordered Genji to kill himself. Or Genji killed himself because he couldnt live without Kinzo. I think Genji is the last link here, since he was found with the boiler room key.

We discuss for a moment the fact that the boiler room had two entrances. I dont know if Ryukishi intended for both doors to be locked, or if he was counting on us to forget about it. Even though I know its ultimately not the answer to this particular mystery, it IS a solution that I dont think the game addresses.

Arria keeps getting ahead of the game. She brings up things such as suicide, traps, poison, etc. and I have to keep telling her to read on. These are all things that Battler mentions.

Battler argues that one of them could have committed suicide. Virgilia states that a motiveless crime would normally be unthinkable, but we cannot cancel out such a possibility.
A: I dont like this. I disagree. Without a motive, what would the purpose of a crime be?
Ronove: Even if we dont know the motive, that doesnt mean there isnt one. Kinzo could have been trying to send a message
A: Yeah, something like that
---

Honestly I think Ryuukishi just plain forgot about the other entrance to the boiler room.

Its even mentioned in Episode 1 there is no lock on it.

Eerieka posted...

A: I dont like this. I disagree. Without a motive, what would the purpose of a crime be?

Getting REAL ahead of the game here. Like 4 Episodes ahead. :p

Arria seems to be really big on motivation in crimes. I'm not sure why. Like in ep 2 when Rosa started accusing Kanon due him being missing, Arria's big reason for trusting in Kanon was because she didn't think he had a motive.
---

Beatrice announces in red that none of the six committed suicide.

A: Five out of the six die in the same way. Spear/gun whatever. We understand its the stakes from the last game. One of them we cant see how he died Kinzo. Now, we saw that bullshit about him calling the servants to his study and he burst into flames. Piece Battler didnt see it, so that was symbolic. The servants were in these rooms to begin with, Kinzo walked to each of them and killed them. Then he went into the boiler room which has two exits! and locked the door on the inside. He didnt mean to kill himself, but hes old and frail and he slipped into the boiler on accident!
K: This is good stuff.
A: Do I understand that there will be more murders that I cant blame on Kinzo? Yes! But for this problem Alternatively, Nanjo is a highly trained battle walrus taught to kill everyone if Kinzo ever dies suspiciously.

Beatrice is about to refute that theory but Ronove stops her, and then she gives up.
A: or there were two murderers and they were both killed by someone else

Game: something a bout killing intent
A: That killing intent is the aura of a highly trained battle walrus. I mean, if Kumasawa is the fucking original Beatrice, that walrus could be Merlin.

Arria reads the letter in the TIPS just to make sure there isnt any fuckery going on. She wonders if Kinzos father was also named Kinzo and maybe there are some shenanigans with names, such that when the letter says I inherited the gold from Kinzo-sama it might actually be referring to HIS father. All I said is that eventually the game will get to the aspect of names and that Kinzo is the only Kinzo. No one else can use that name.
I was REALLY scared that shed bring up the fact that Shannon and Kanon arent their real names, but she didnt. Dont know if she forgot, just didnt think about it, or thought it was irrelevant. Or maybe shes so far on the Kinzo train that a few pieces of furniture dont even register on her radar.
---

The adults are actually trying to solve the riddle finally!
Arria is looking at it way too much. I already told her its impossible without knowing Japanese and Chinese, but the hamster in her head is running somewhere!

They mention line breaks and dividing the epitaph into sections. Arria wondered if it implied the epitaph wasnt complete, or something was missing. I told her that it was complete.

Oh boy here comes sucker merry barrels
A: Heh, cute Rudolf.

Theres a boink sound effect and the game tells us it was Hideyoshis stomach grumbling
K: Not what my stomach sounds like!
A: I had no idea that boink was the sound of a rumbling stomach

A: I love that the entire family agrees that Kinzo is a drama queen.

(I have no idea what prompted this)
A: At what point do we get a portrait of Battler choking Beatrice?
---

Beatrice and Virgilia have their conversation about how to trick Battler
A: Are they really having the Aww, but theres this boooooy, and I dont know how to taaaaalk to him. Because this is a little bit awkward!
Virgilia talks about the North Wind and the Sun. I just want to throw it out there that I thought Beatrices long con for the rest of this chapter was freaking obvious. When people talk about getting trolled by her, Im like did you forget that conversation they had? Not that Im one to talk since I forget conversations I had irl five minutes ago. >_> Anyway, lets see what Arria remembers when that time comes.
Virgilia: violent methods arent always the best
Beatrice: You dont have to tell me that!
A: Well apparently she does, you crazy bitch

Eva and her inner self get to solving the epitaph
Inner Eva: Men are always children, no matter how old they get
A: Truth. As a person who owns a male, I can say thats accurate. *looks at dog* And Im not referring to you.
K; Although hell also always be a child. Especially since Im always calling him a puppy and telling him how sweet he is.

Arria asks if the homeland in the riddle is Rokkenjima
K: Nah
A: Is it America?
K: Nah. Remember what I said. In order to solve the riddle, you need knowledge of Japanese, English, and Chinese (I emphasize the Chinese part)
A: Ah, well I thought I would try.
---

Eerieka posted...

I just want to throw it out there that I thought Beatrices long con for the rest of this chapter was freaking obvious. When people talk about getting trolled by her, Im like did you forget that conversation they had? Not that Im one to talk since I forget conversations I had irl five minutes ago. >_> Anyway, lets see what Arria remembers when that time comes.

I mean, that story doesn't end with "And then the sun and wind conspire together to MURDER the traveler!!!"

It just means that kindness is a better way to persuade someone than confrontation. If anything, that conversation points more toward her being genuine than not, especially since Virgilia is presented as on your side at this point. (Never mind that the whole thing is a double-troll in the first place and both of them were on Battler's side from the beginning...)

Well, the metaphor would be awfully obvious if THAT was the end of the North Wind and Sun Story! What I'm saying is I've seen a lot of people buy into the sweet 'aww, look! Beatrice reformed!' act.

Course you're right, it ends up being a double-troll anyway, but that doesn't come until later. Up until this point, we're led to believe that Beatrice is a nasty piece of work.

~~~

Eva enters the library
A: Oh hell yes
(Arria really likes books. In fact when we took a break earlier, we went to a used book store and she got a fuck ton of books for cheap.)

A: Anyone else notice that young Eva has blue eyes while the real Eva doesnt?
K; yeah, its a strange choice. Im not sure why that is. Its that way with the original sprites too.

A: Her inner Arria is a bitch
K: *cackle* That was one of those laughs of you dont know the half of it

Eva gets to the room with the gold. Arria expects a jump scare when the door opens
A: Or the dead body of the dead Beatrice is going to be crucified here.

We get Happiness of Marionette and I told Arria that this is my definitive song for ep 3. Like, this is the song that plays in my head when I think Umineko episode 3. Usually I associate an episodes big zts song with that episode, but for 3, its this one.

A: Shes dreaming. Shes going to wake up and wonder why such a nice dream couldnt be real
(She looks at me as if suspecting I would give her a straight answer. I dont)

Eva: I used to think money didnt matter, but it does!
A: That is not the moral of this story!
---

Eva climbs back up the stairs and mentions seeing another person with a gun
A: A mirror?
Rosa appears
A: Oh boy. This wont end well.

A: This seems like a conversation between two socialites who are slowly poisoning each others tea.

Arria wanted me to look up the price of gold.
K: For today or back in 1986?
A: Yes, that.
It was just shy of $400 for a Troy ounce. Its currently over $700. Im not sure what was going through her head. Maybe she was just curious

Beatrice tells young Eva that she acknowledges her as the successor and head of the family
A; She is most terrifying when she is being pleasant. Like, Im making dinner! Does it involve my family? Well, they were invited! (Joking about eating the family last episode)

As much as I hate Evatrice, I really like her scene where she becomes a witch.

We talk for a while about the meaning behind the witches, that they all symbolize something. I had told her back in the episode 2 tea party about how Lambdadelta, Bernkastel, and Beatrice all represent ideas in probability. Certainty, Miracles, and rolling a die Endlessly. Shes trying to think of ways Evatrice can play into these. One of her ideas was actually the idea behind the Witch of Origins something from nothing. I was impressed with that, so I gave her credit for her idea.
---

Alright, back to the adults
Rudolf: Ill stay awake. Its the only manly thing I can do
Kyrie basically makes fun of him by saying shell stay awake with him; its the only womanly thing she can do
A: I love Kyrie so much. Making fun of the menfolk the way I would

Arria notices that Evas gloves are two different lengths
A: Has it always been that way!? Why am I just now noticing?
K: I think you noticed right away back in like, episode 1. You must have just forgotten and not noticed afterwards.

Maria is stomping her feet in frustration. The game describes Rosas reaction as anguished, etc.
K: Lemme guess, you are feeling what Rosa is feeling, arent you?
She just grins ominously

Theres a line that says There was Maria sobbing, along with the cousins and Nanjo. It meant that they were all present, but I first misread it as they were all sobbing
A: Now look what you did! You upset the walrus! You know how many fish it takes to make him happy again?!
---

Aaaand we get to the great scene of Rosa wanting to tranquilize Maria. Im glad tcaz told us about this earlier or it would have been a strange surprise.
Rudolf mentions it being a small silver pill which neither of us are familiar with
K: He might also be doing the dumb dad thing where hes never used said pill, but saw it on TV
A: I like that idea. Or its some pill from 1986 that was found to cause autism in kids and is now banned.

Hideyoshi: My hand is a magic hand
A: I cant make this any more perverted than it already is

It becomes obvious to Battler that Rosa and Maria will be the 2nd twilight, and he starts screaming at someone to fucking notice them. Beatrice says its pointless, no one will notice them
A: I agree with Beatrice. Just let it happen.

Evatrice argues with Rosa about the gold
A: I really like her dress, by the way
K: I figured you would

Happiness of Marionette plays again as the twilight starts
A: I like this song!

A; Oh my god she is heavy handed

During the torture, Evatrice throws Rosa into some coffee jelly
A: Coffee jelly is a thing that exists?
K: *shrugs* I guess?
A: I need this in my life
And then we look it up. Honestly doesnt look that good to me, but Im kinda a boring person when it comes to food. Arria absolutely drools over it. Thanks Ryukishi, for giving Arria more dessert options.
---

Aw shit getting close to 500. Gonna have to save everything

~~~

Evatrice has a line about Rosa "enjoying the experience she had dreamed about. Definitely. Probably."
A: Haha, I like that: Definitely. Probably.

Then Rosa becomes a butterfly and gets caught in a spider web
A: Not. Okay

Beatrice talks about teaching magic to Battler if he submits
A: This is borderline pornographic

Battler: Eva wouldnt do this!
A: If she were sane. Im not entirely sure she is anymore.

Battler goes nuts with DISAPPEAR! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN
A: I want to remember this and yell it at customers who piss me off at work.

Battler pushes her away and the graphic of the red barrier appears
A: Is he becoming Shannon now?
K: I dont remember the barrier graphic appearing in the original version. But its been a long time and I wouldnt remember a small thing like that.

Arria starts holding back laughter
A: One moment. I finally remember who she reminds me of.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ArNz8U7tgU4
---

Eerieka posted...

K: I dont remember the barrier graphic appearing in the original version.

It does

Ronove disappears into the darkness after Beatrice bitches him out
A: And if you want him back, cast magic missile at the darkness.

A: I am not falling for this kid pick last in the schoolyard schtick. Youre a monster!

Evatrice is having so much fun with magic!
A: I take back everything terrible Ive ever said about the Dresden Files Council or the Elemental Masters Exeter Club. The Umineko universe NEEDS something like that badly. Ill even go so far as to say that maybe half the Jedi order is okay. Not good! Just okay.

Evatrice gets an awesome face featuring one eye open, tongue out. Arria freaks out.
A: UAGH *goes to original sprites* Well, children, we found the ONE sprite that is more horrible than the original!

A: You know what would amuse my happy little ass? If we opened the Braun tubes, so to speak, and it was a bunch of little people staring up at us. Beatrice was right the whole time!

Oh my god Miki Itous Evatrice laughter is so fucking weird. I share that sentiment out loud
A: She is just too weird to be allowed
---

Evatrice: I gotta try harder to be as cruel as you!
A: That is not the takeaway from this lesson, child!

We get a mention of the fence piercing Rosas medulla oblongata and we both chuckle. As a reminder, that word has a deeper meaning to the two of us. Its an inside joke thing.

I was writing when Lucifer appeared and announced herself as Lucifer of Pride. I didnt know the Japanese word for Pride used here: gouman and it sounded like goumon (torture) so I had to look up what she said out of curiosity. Still, Lucifer of Torture would also be a fitting name!

Back to the living adults doing living things

Rudolf called Rosa an idiot
A: Youre not wrong, sir

Rudolf then mentions finding Rosa and Maria and spanking them
A: Please tell me theres fanart of this!
K: I havent seen it, but I wouldnt be surprising if it exists!

Theres some weird graphical issue with the profiles going on. We try to fix it, but to no avail. Whatevs. It still works, you just cant see their faces on the left side
K: So how dead is Maria?
A: Strangled. Dead enough.
K: Dead enough to satisfy you?
A: Yes
---

So apparently Ryuukishi is writing another Umineko Episode set in the middle of Chiru, to be released with an Umineko collection.

Sweet! I'm excited! :D

Also, 500 topic. :D I'll make a new topic tomorrow with the update. tcaz, if you have any more info, you gotta tell me or link me tomorrow.
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