There's this girl I've been "friends" with for quite a long time. Close to 10 years now. I've never been very close with her though. Our relationship started when I was making fun of her boyfriend at the time. She liked that because she's weird. But he was a hot topic poser, as was she, so they were my enemies. Of course.
Anyways, she's a crazy party girl. She's tried pretty much every drug. A typical night for her would be getting wasted, doing coke, and being out until sunrise. I was never a part of any of these groups she would go with. If I ever saw her, we would just do stuff in the afternoon, usually on Sundays, and she would leave when it started getting dark and her real friends started calling her.
Any time I tried to make a move on her, she would get mad at me. Even though she was always flirty, she wouldn't let me near. She didn't see me that way. Yeah yeah yeah. Heard it all before.
Skip to today. For the past couple weeks, she's been wanting to come over every day. In some ways, I've become her best friend. Why is this? Why, because she's 4 months pregnant! She cut off all her partying ways when she got knocked up and so her excuse is that she can't hang out with those people anymore, and she hates being at home. So now she sits around watching tv with me.
And it's pretty boring.
Here's the thing, though. She really seems into me. More and more, she keeps doing things that seem to suggest she wants to get boned. Now, this guy who got her pregnant is allegedly the love of her life and she's going to marry him, but he's never around. She hasn't seen him in weeks. He just works all the time, she says.
I'm starting to wonder if this guy doesn't really exist and she's prepping me to take care of this kid when it's born. She's already told me to be there at the birth and film it. Yesterday she asked me to come with her to get her ultrasound. I told her no, that's f***ing weird, I'm not the father, stop it. So she gets all mad at me.
Later on, I'm at a Monday Night Football party and I randomly send her a text saying "Meet up" just for fun. She's like "Ok I'll leave in 10 minutes." Like holy s***. Like she really wants to come over. I have to tell her I'm not home, I'm at this party, and she's just like ok tell me when to leave. It's not until three hours later at midnight that I get home from this thing and call her. She doesn't care at all. She still wants to come over.
So then it's all running through my head. Am I about to bang a fat pregnant girl? I mean, why is she so into coming over this late?
She comes and we go downstairs. She sits on my couch for less than a minute before she decides to move to my bed. Also I have three crazy dogs so they jump all over her and stuff and that's what's going on on the bed. 4 bodies up there, I'm still on my couch.
Cut to the chase, I never joined her. She just laid down and made no hints that it was ok to join her. Even when I asked her what the hell she's doing, she said she's sleeping on my bed and I'm sleeping on my couch. Great. What was the point of her coming over in the first place? Does she think about doing it but then have second thoughts? Is she waiting for me to just get on the bed with her?
I got to the point that I was frantic to get her out of there because my dad would be getting up for work in less than 2 hours. I did not want her passing out in my bed, along with her car blocking the driveway. That's a whole new level of awkwardness to deal with.
I keep annoying her to keep her up. I says to her, I says, "Wanna read some comic books?" She says no!
So I says to her, I says, "Wanna play Yahtzee?" Her response to this was "Wanna play who's in my mouth?" I actually dropped this thing I was holding when I heard that. I say "What does that mean?" and she just goes Hmmm.
I just looked it up now... it is a real game. Wow.
Was she coming on to me? Was she waiting for me to climb in with her? After reading what this "game" is, I'm really confused. Damn it all.