Current Events > Just got (attempted) sextorted

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[deleted]
10/15/23 10:02:49 PM
#35:


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Anteaterking
10/15/23 11:41:34 PM
#1:


Basically messaging with someone on a dating app, looking out for the normal red flags like the scripted bot conversations, people who don't seem to know what location they're allegedly in, people who are angling for either paid sex work of trying to get payment from me.

Conversation eventually moves to trading some salacious pics. I took one and then they asked for a face pic and I didn't think anything of it because I've gotten that from real people enough who want to make sure I actually match my profile and stuff. Fifteen minutes later they've used my phone number to find my Facebook account (I'm not exactly sure how this worked because they didn't have my real name, but I'm assuming that you're able to used the number tied to the account to find the associated profile even if my phone number isn't displayed?) and threaten to send our conversation and nudes to all of the people on my friends list.

They asked for $500 and I bluffed them that I had to talk to someone to get the money and used that time to call my friend to talk through what to do. I made more of my Facebook settings private (Most of my posts and things aren't visible but I guess friends list was for some reason) and filled out the form at https://stopncii.org/ in order to get the hashes of those images blocked. I also told my brother to be on the lookout to report accounts that tried to share things with him as I thought he would be more "aware" than most of my family and friends. Blocked the number, reported the associated accounts, and am filling out an FBI tip line/report thing for it.

Nothing has happened and tbh I don't think anything will, but I do feel violated and it kind of sucks.

/blogfaqs

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#2
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Umbreon
10/15/23 11:52:16 PM
#3:


That blows. Hopefully that asshole gets arrested for this.

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CableZL
10/15/23 11:54:21 PM
#4:


That's one reason I got tired of dating apps. It takes a lot of time constantly doing detective work to determine whether the other person is genuine. There are so many bots and scammers.

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Anteaterking
10/15/23 11:54:43 PM
#5:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


With some dating apps I definitely wouldn't, but this was one where that sort of thing was less unusual of a request.


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Payzmaykr
10/15/23 11:56:45 PM
#6:


Arent you supposed to use chat apps for dating services? Also, I deleted my Facebook a few months ago because someone hacked it. In this day and age, having a social media account with people you really know isnt a good idea. It sucks, but the internet is too predatory to risk it. Facebook is almost impossible to contact, too, so I recommend closing the account ASAP.
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Occupy_This
10/16/23 12:00:51 AM
#7:


Never give out your real phone number to people on the internet even though they seem real.

Ive always used the number from my text free app. Once they ask for cash I block them. Number isnt attached to anything.


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Anteaterking
10/16/23 12:06:26 AM
#8:


CableZL posted...
That's one reason I got tired of dating apps. It takes a lot of time constantly doing detective work to determine whether the other person is genuine. There are so many bots and scammers.

It's kind of exhausting but up until now they've all been "quick" and so I'll roll my eyes and waste five minutes to get to the obvious pitch. Now I feel like even that is insufficient.

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KaZooo
10/16/23 12:06:59 AM
#9:


Anteaterking posted...
Conversation eventually moves to trading some salacious pics.
No offense TC

But people have to stop acting like this is supposed to be some kind of new normal. There's nothing smart and everything obviously dumb about it.

I remember my friend doing that, and I was loosely friends with his ex. She was above being a scumbag, but he was...difficult in the aftermath, and she's sitting there thinking "you know I still have this?" while never sending him pics of herself.

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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 12:08:33 AM
#10:


KaZooo posted...
No offense TC

But people have to stop acting like this is supposed to be some kind of new normal. There's nothing smart and everything obviously dumb about it.

I remember my friend doing that, and I was loosely friends with his ex. She was above being a scumbag, but he was...difficult in the aftermath, and she's sitting there thinking "you know I still have this?" while never sending him pics of herself.

Could you not victim blame?

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#11
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itachi15243
10/16/23 12:09:38 AM
#12:


Did you send them a pic where your face was in it and you were nude or something?

Never do that. Just send a separate pic of only your face if you have to send a face pic. Not very many people will be able to tell if a particular dick pick came from you that way. >.>

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Priere
10/16/23 12:09:53 AM
#13:


Its probably some dude in an internet Cafe in Nigeria. They will move on by tomorrow.

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variasuite
10/16/23 12:11:21 AM
#14:


KaZooo posted...
No offense TC

But people have to stop acting like this is supposed to be some kind of new normal. There's nothing smart and everything obviously dumb about it.

I remember my friend doing that, and I was loosely friends with his ex. She was above being a scumbag, but he was...difficult in the aftermath, and she's sitting there thinking "you know I still have this?" while never sending him pics of herself.


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Super_Slash
10/16/23 12:12:40 AM
#15:


SayHeyyShohei posted...
Could you not victim blame?
He has a point though. It should be fairly obvious when you're talking to a bot or scammer. Most of them follow the same general pattern, and just the way they respond to you usually gives it away. If something feels off, like they're getting raunchy immediately, chances are good it's a bot or a scammer.
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Mystery_man2
10/16/23 12:14:30 AM
#16:


Probably some dude living in his parents basement.
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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 12:14:41 AM
#17:


Yikes @ some of the responses in this thread

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Arcanine2009
10/16/23 12:15:08 AM
#18:


Something similar happened to me. Hella bots on tinder. They ask you to add them on Snapchat and say they will send you pics, and then ask for your phone number and/or your email address and hack into your account. Said person got into my FB account but didn't do anything to it. Thar said they went into my tinder profile and hacked it. Took out all my stuff and replaced with a fake female account. I changed my stuff back but somebody tagged me and got my account closed.

Moral of the story: If shit looks sus, it probably is. Especially pictures. If they have a Snapchat and ask you to add it, don't.

Also somewhat related. Last week I was getting my car serviced and was walking at a park and tbis middle school girl asks if she could borrow my phone so somebody could pick her up. She said she had to log in her Instagram account to contact someone. I let her borrow it. She forgot to sign out after, and I went in and checked.. she freaking had a fake profile. One picture of a grown woman and hella guys dming her and shit. I was like wtf.

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variasuite
10/16/23 12:16:29 AM
#19:


SayHeyyShohei posted...
Yikes @ some of the responses in this thread
The idea that sending strangers nude pics is not a good fucking idea could only be controversial on this board.

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Arcanine2009
10/16/23 12:16:41 AM
#20:


Priere posted...
Its probably some dude in an internet Cafe in Nigeria. They will move on by tomorrow.

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Yeah that's true. But I wouldn't assume that everyone is doing that. Them just saying they will send you pics and then they randomly asking for your number and email is not good.

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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 12:17:24 AM
#21:


variasuite posted...
The idea that sending strangers nude pics is not a good fucking idea could only be controversial on this board.

Victim blaming is victim blaming

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Super_Slash
10/16/23 12:18:44 AM
#22:


variasuite posted...
The idea that sending strangers nude pics is not a good fucking idea could only be controversial on this board.
This dude is intentionally having the opposite opinion on everything just to ruffle feathers.
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boomgetchopped3
10/16/23 12:19:53 AM
#23:


That fucking sucks. So glad Im not dating in this wacky era. Damn like what percentage of women ask for dong pics? Must be fun when the person isnt a scammer lol.
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NPC
10/16/23 12:20:37 AM
#24:


I'm ashamed at the victim blaming happening here. Not all of us are perfect and who hasn't sent nudes within a day of chatting with a random stranger.
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variasuite
10/16/23 12:20:38 AM
#25:


SayHeyyShohei posted...
Victim blaming is victim blaming
It's a terrible thing that happens but you need to protect yourself from being a victim too. A year-long relationship? Fine, you're not responsible. A rando you've never met on Tinder? You've got to be proactive in preventing that kind of stuff.

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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 12:21:52 AM
#26:


Super_Slash posted...
This dude is intentionally having the opposite opinion on everything just to ruffle feathers.
My apologies for thinking adding fuel to the fire by victim blaming is disgusting. If that ruffles feathers, the birds need to be looked at from a mirror.

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variasuite
10/16/23 12:23:36 AM
#27:


Super_Slash posted...
This dude is intentionally having the opposite opinion on everything just to ruffle feathers.
The responses contradict that, but enjoy your own reality, I guess?

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#28
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boomgetchopped3
10/16/23 12:25:01 AM
#29:


SayHeyyShohei posted...
My apologies for thinking adding fuel to the fire by victim blaming is disgusting. If that ruffles feathers, the birds need to be looked at from a mirror.

Nobody in this topic victim blamed. It was a warning that people can take advantage and they used their own experience to explain. Thats not victim blaming
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Mystery_man2
10/16/23 12:25:02 AM
#30:


A few years ago I received e-mails from someone claiming that they had found my profile on Ashley Madison and if I didnt send them some bit coins theyd send it to everyone I know.

Funny thing is. Ive never been on Ashley Madison.
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Anteaterking
10/16/23 12:25:55 AM
#31:


itachi15243 posted...
Did you send them a pic where your face was in it and you were nude or something?

No but you could combine the the nude photo with the face photo and see that they were the same person.

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Mew
10/16/23 12:28:23 AM
#32:


Imagine how many penises these scammers have to solicit and see in a day

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Arcanine2009
10/16/23 12:29:14 AM
#33:


boomgetchopped3 posted...
That fucking sucks. So glad Im not dating in this wacky era. Damn like what percentage of women ask for dong pics? Must be fun when the person isnt a scammer lol.
Not many. It's more like the fake ones ask you to add them on Instagram, then promise you pics. They might ask for your credit card number or cash, which is pretty self explanatory red flag. Or they ask your number and hack into your account.

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variasuite
10/16/23 12:29:42 AM
#34:


boomgetchopped3 posted...
Nobody in this topic victim blamed. It was a warning that people can take advantage and they used their own experience to explain. Thats not victim blaming
Thank you. I hate that this happened and it's not TC's fault. They were trusting and taken advantage of. You've just got to be defensive with dirtbags online.

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cjsdowg
10/16/23 12:37:40 AM
#36:


I am sorry people are being mean to you Anteaterking, you were literal a victim of a sex crime. And no one should have to deal with that or be worried that their pictures would be sent out to the world.


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Dungeater
10/16/23 12:39:57 AM
#37:


jesus. scary. it sounds like it'll probably be fine but shit i'd still worry for a couple days. i hope u get some time to wind down, and i hope nothin comes of this

what app was it?

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xGhostchantx
10/16/23 12:42:28 AM
#38:


On the bright side, they'll all go into Message Requests, I never check mine, I could have legit people looking for me and I wouldn't know. I don't think many people actually check them. You don't even get a notification.

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Super_Slash
10/16/23 12:46:57 AM
#39:


TC will be fine, I've been in quite a few of those situations. You did the right thing by cutting all contact immediately.
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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 4:55:47 AM
#40:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


Given your takes like the one itt, this is a compliment.

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divot1338
10/16/23 4:58:36 AM
#41:


Payzmaykr posted...
Arent you supposed to use chat apps for dating services? Also, I deleted my Facebook a few months ago because someone hacked it. In this day and age, having a social media account with people you really know isnt a good idea. It sucks, but the internet is too predatory to risk it. Facebook is almost impossible to contact, too, so I recommend closing the account ASAP.
How did you get them to delete it? Im in the same boat.

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potdnewb
10/16/23 4:58:42 AM
#42:


Umbreon posted...
That blows. Hopefully that asshole gets arrested for this.
without additional info it could have been the asshole that was sent as a pic

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Glob
10/16/23 5:05:15 AM
#43:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]


I would never give out that sort of pics.
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Zikten
10/16/23 5:28:52 AM
#44:


some people have committed suicide after falling victim to this. Also, most of the perpetrators are in other countries where they will never be prosecuted.
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#45
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Guide
10/16/23 5:57:11 AM
#46:


SayHeyyShohei posted...
Victim blaming is victim blaming

Victim blaming isn't some absolute virtue, it came about from a time when you could literally blame a woman for being raped as a legal defense for the rapist. That doesn't mean any and all victims of any and all situations are totally absolved of responsibility.

@TC they usually just move on to the next person because it's not worth the effort to take the time to spread your stuff, don't worry.

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Cuticrusader09
10/16/23 6:17:59 AM
#47:


boomgetchopped3 posted...
That fucking sucks. So glad Im not dating in this wacky era. Damn like what percentage of women ask for dong pics? Must be fun when the person isnt a scammer lol.
Real women? Pretty much 0%.
Scammers? 100%
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SayHeyyShohei
10/16/23 6:49:22 AM
#48:


Guide posted...
Victim blaming isn't some absolute virtue, it came about from a time when you could literally blame a woman for being raped as a legal defense for the rapist. That doesn't mean any and all victims of any and all situations are totally absolved of responsibility.

@TC they usually just move on to the next person because it's not worth the effort to take the time to spread your stuff, don't worry.

Yikes

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ScazarMeltex
10/16/23 6:56:10 AM
#49:


[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

Don't walk down a dark alley at night in a skirt.

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#50
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