Current Events > Harry Potter poop opens up so many questions

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Perhaps the most pressing, where does all the poop go?

The books have never demonstrated magic that can straight up erase matter from existence. In fact, the Hogwarts House Elves situation proves the universe still somewhat obeys basic thermodynamics, because they cant just magically create food out of nothing.

So when wizards magic away their poop, it goes *somewhere*. But where? The Thames? But perhaps thats not as important as what are the mechanics of disposing of the poop?

Making something disappear in the Harry Potter universe is a form of apparition. But apparition is a relatively high level spell. As late as Harrys fourth year at Hogwarts, he still hadnt learned it. So were old timey wizards just better at magic? Or were 13 year olds just shitting wherever, and some older wizard had to come after them and clean it up?

But even then, apparition isnt always available. Anti-apparition charms are common and used in places like Hogwarts and the Ministry of Magic. Can you magic away your poop at Hogwarts? If apparition doesnt work, it seems unlikely that you could. So what, does the janitor clean up all the student poop? Is that why Filch is always so angry?

I dunno, guys. Rowling never had to bring up solutions to wizard defecation, but she did,
and its been prodding at my brain ever since.

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I asked JK Rowling how this works, and she informed me that the poop is lesbian.

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They condense it into tiny, diamond-like poopstones, which come with a host of magic health complications, and are the reason Diagon Alley has such awful roads.

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I think Moaning Myrtle takes care of it.

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Obligatory ProZD
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1RMITgiPyk

I wonder if they perform abortions the same way >_> Like they have the chick on that chair with her legs spread wide open, and then a witch crouches down and gets right in there and chants some spell with her wand before shooting it inside the chick and zapping the fetus away somewhere

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Trumble posted...

I asked JK Rowling how this works, and she informed me that the poop is lesbian.

lmao >_>

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cjs28 posted...

I wonder if they perform abortions the same way >_>

omfg
neon no!

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cjs28 posted...

I wonder if they perform abortions the same way >_> Like they have the chick on that chair with her legs spread wide open, and then a witch crouches down and gets right in there and chants some spell with her wand before shooting it inside the chick and zapping the fetus away somewhere

Supportus Begonus

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cjs28 posted...

I wonder if they perform abortions the same way >_> Like they have the chick on that chair with her legs spread wide open, and then a witch crouches down and gets right in there and chants some spell with her wand before shooting it inside the chick and zapping the fetus away somewhere

Fetus deletus

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16-BITTER posted...

I only read like 2-3 of those books but I seem to recall a bathroom being a major plot setting

That was before Joanne told us, apropos of fucking nothing mind you, that wizards used to shit in the hall or wherever and then just magic it away.

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Most people refuse to accept it as canon.

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BLAKUboy posted...

[LFAQs-redacted-quote]

That was before Joanne told us, apropos of fucking nothing mind you, that wizards used to shit in the hall or wherever and then just magic it away.

Nobody:
JKR: by the way, they used to shit in the halls and magic it away.
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>school is hundreds of years old and was built with a sewer system, toilets
>"until modern plumbing they pissed and shit themselves then used magic"

Those toilets were just sitting there unused for how many hundreds of years lmao

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GreatGoomba posted...

Fetus deletus

Holy shit!

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GreatGoomba posted...

Fetus deletus

LMAO

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gunplagirl posted...

Those toilets were just sitting there unused for how many hundreds of years lmao

More likely, technology sufficiently advanced (specifically indoor plumbing) to be better than magic, and there was conveniently some snake-temple thing in the basement plenty big for storing poop.

gunplagirl posted...

>school is hundreds of years old and was built with a sewer system, toilets
>"until modern plumbing they pissed and shit themselves then used magic"

Those toilets were just sitting there unused for how many hundreds of years lmao

She actually realized she created kind of a plot hole. The explanation was that a descendant of Slytherin was around when they installed plumbing and managed to create and hide the Chamber's new entrance in the sink.

And wizard can Vanish things. It's described as sending something "into non-being, which was to say, everything." Presumably, the spell just atomizes whatever it is you vanish.

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pegusus123456 posted...

And wizard can Vanish things. It's described as sending something "into non-being, which was to say, everything." Presumably, the spell just atomizes whatever it is you vanish.

I smell a loophole with the unforgivable curses >_>


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