Current Events > Signs that someone doesn't know how to cook

(+) Yeah! (+)

brb boxed mac and cheese in the pantry
brb boiling veggies instead of sauteing or roasting
brb not adding enough salt on the food
brb using canned Alfredo, canned tomato sauce instead of making it from scratch
brb frying bacon instead of sticking it in the oven


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Brb Taco Bell coupons

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making a sandwich

plate of sashimi

saying "I don't know how to cook"

They can't make a good vegan dish.

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Oven bacon is doo-doo

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Making this topic

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TheHoldSteady posted...

brb boxed mac and cheese in the pantry

nothing wrong with that, get over yourself.

brb boiling veggies instead of sauteing or roasting

do you mean steamed?

brb not adding enough salt on the food

i never add salt to food unless i'm baking or marinating meat, its the type of thing that can be added as needed by the person eating the food in the end.

brb using canned Alfredo, canned tomato sauce instead of making it from scratch

i've never liked alfredo sauce so i've never seen the need to buy or make it. but i've bought plenty of canned tomato sauce and i've made plenty of it from scratch and i can happily tell you that if you're using the shit tomatoes from the store you're going to end up with an end product that tastes just like the canned stuff with 5x the effort. tomato sauce from home grown tomatoes is superior to store bought but they run out eventually.

brb frying bacon instead of sticking it in the oven

a smart cook makes their bacon on the grill, dont have to fuck around with the grease or the smell inside.

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It's alright - you make it, and I'll love it

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If you're at their house and you see their fire alarm still plugged in... don't eat anything they make you.

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DuranOfForcena posted...

when you bake bacon, you can do it in a broiler pan with the bottom lined with foil. afterwards just drain the grease into a small container and keep it in the fridge to use in place of vegetable oil or butter for things like frying eggs or potatoes. that's what i'd say is smart.

i can do that just as easily on my grill with a drip pan.

DuranOfForcena posted...

also what on earth is wrong with the smell of bacon? that smell of bacon is heavenly.

it becomes less so two days later. the smell doesn't go away.

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Most of that stuff is easier than doing it proper. I love cooking but after work I just want a quick and easy meal. I get off work at 1 in the morning ffs, I just want some food quick.
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when they claim white people don't season their food then percede to salt the shit out of their food

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BobanMarjanovic posted...

percede

"where's your spice cabinet?"

"my what?"
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Slayer_22 posted...

Most of that stuff is easier than doing it proper. I love cooking but after work I just want a quick and easy meal. I get off work at 1 in the morning ffs, I just want some food quick.

cook in bulk and freeze servings. i've got a freezer full of bacon wrapped turkey/gravy/stuffing/hoppin john form thanksgiving still, in individual plastic containers ready to reheat. before that it was stuffed peppers since i had a huge crop this year.

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These topics always turn into a dick measuring contest between people who barely got past the boiled water and fried egg stage of giving two fucks about cooking.

If it tastes good and doesn't give you diarrhea, you know how to cook just fine. Stop trying to be Gordon Grilled Cheese Sandwich.

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This reads like one of those topics made by someone who just learned how to cook a basic dinner and thinks theyre some culinary expert now

just like when you see people say olive oil isnt for cooking

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when they don't know how to cook a well done steak.

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Clean kitchens

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I found a new favorite way to cook bacon.

If i cook bacon i usually like to cook the whole pack. So even though i do like fried bacon, it takes too long and have to do them in batches.

I lay half the pack on an oven try and bake them. And then the new way i did was use one of those electric flat top griddles. I layer them on the griddle while still cold and then heat em up. I then get an empty oven try and line the bottom with foil and use that to press the bacon on the griddle and add a weight on top of that. Flip the bacon half way and repeat until done.

Makes the bacon nice and crispy and flat without too much effort.

Only bad part is i have to clean the flat top. But it also makes it easier o nake a lot of eggs real quick


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Store bought eggs instead of having free range chickens in the backyard.

hamfisting their knife when they wanna cut something lmao

marthsheretoo posted...

If you're at their house and you see their fire alarm still plugged in... don't eat anything they make you.

+1

Well played.

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bknight posted...

Store bought eggs instead of having free range chickens in the backyard.

Not milking their own cow for the bchamel

I can't take any cook seriously who doesn't milk their own cow for the bchamel


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monkmith posted...

a smart cook makes their bacon on the grill, dont have to fuck around with the grease or the smell inside.

The best bacon is cooked for a couple hours on low heat, in a covered cast iron pot or dutch oven.
If your house doesn't smell like bacon for at least three days, you did it wrong.

ApherosyLove posted...

I caramelized some onions for a grilled cheese once and it was the best thing ever but I don't think I could ever spend 80 minutes on a sandwich again.

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monkmith posted...

cook in bulk and freeze servings. i've got a freezer full of bacon wrapped turkey/gravy/stuffing/hoppin john form thanksgiving still, in individual plastic containers ready to reheat. before that it was stuffed peppers since i had a huge crop this year.

Yeah, that does make sense, but at the same time if I'm gonna cook food, I just make enough for myself or maybe four people. Cooking a month's worth of food just to eat it for a month sounds...idk, boring. One good meal, however? Fantastic.
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Slayer_22 posted...

Yeah, that does make sense, but at the same time if I'm gonna cook food, I just make enough for myself or maybe four people. Cooking a month's worth of food just to eat it for a month sounds...idk, boring. One good meal, however? Fantastic.

You can always repurpose leftovers if you get tired of them

Like leftover chili can be made to make quesadillas, chili dogs, tater tot casserole, etc


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TheHoldSteady posted...

You can always repurpose leftovers if you get tired of them

Like leftover chili can be made to make quesadillas, chili dogs, tater tot casserole, etc

Fair enough, not gonna argue otherwise. Just not something I do too often.
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I'm a pretty damn good cook and even I fuck with easy mac.

Throw some breadcrumbs, some seasoning, and some shredded cheese on top. Then add hot sauce.

Chefs kiss

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...when you hear "haachama chama!" from the kitchen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B5KoNaDvfmc

So anything boxed and bought is not cooking, got it.

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90% of the people on this board who post their anemic and blank looking food pics.

When they think a $10 trash knife is as good as a quality chef's knife or that cheap pots and pans are as good as quality ones (also a CEman thing)

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Ysmir posted...

90% of the people on this board who post their anemic and blank looking food pics.

When they think a $10 trash knife is as good as a quality chef's knife or that cheap pots and pans are as good as quality ones (also a CEman thing)

lol it's not an rpg... better equipment won't make better food

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Ysmir posted...

or that cheap pots and pans are as good as quality ones

Cast iron, always.
It's cheap and lasts forever.

Questionmarktarius posted...

Cast iron, always.
It's cheap and lasts forever.

Love a good cast iron

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Not a lot of bad iron out there.
You have to actively try to ruin cast iron, and even then it can be cleaned up and reseasoned fairly easily.

brb chucking shit in a pan and calling it stir frying

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QwelzaarKane posted...

I caramelized some onions for a grilled cheese once and it was the best thing ever but I don't think I could ever spend 80 minutes on a sandwich again.

What I like to do is on the weekends, slice up a bunch of onion bulbs julienne style and saut them with butter and thyme. 30 minutes later and boom, you have caramelized onions for the rest of the week.

Do things in large batches, it's faster and pays off in dividends.

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If you freeze and thaw an onion, it's halfway caramelized already.

marthsheretoo posted...

If you're at their house and you see their fire alarm still plugged in... don't eat anything they make you.

Never thought of this. Facts.

They use a nonstick skillet

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they bring food at work but throw some away

thats me

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Not using enough salt could just mean they have a family history of high blood pressure

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Slayer_22 posted...

Most of that stuff is easier than doing it proper. I love cooking but after work I just want a quick and easy meal. I get off work at 1 in the morning ffs, I just want some food quick.

It takes like seven minutes to pan fry some fish.

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Payzmaykr posted...

It takes like seven minutes to pan fry some fish.

lol

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"I don't like onions"
"I don't like garlic"

I know so many people like this

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TC being judgemental? sounds like another poster around here

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