Current Events > Its crazy to me how so few people on here have a desire to raise a family

(+) Yeah! (+)

What if there is a human capital shortage

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If anything, I'd adopt. >_>

But at this point in my life, I'm okay with not having kids.

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I have a hard enough time following through with plans I make a few days in advance. When the day comes, I just might not be in the mood to do it anymore.

Being a parent requires a 24/7 commitment that I don't think I have in me. I was fine with being an uncle. I could spend time with young kids playing with them, but when I just needed to get away and be by myself for awhile, I could do that. I wasn't the parent, so handing them back to mom or dad didn't make me feel any guilt.

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I'd be fine with it with the right girl. None of the women I've dated were family types though. I'm only 20 so I've got time.

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Personally, I want to have 3-5 kids.

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I didn't want to be brought into this world, why would I add more problems?

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Raising a family in this terrible world is nothing short of pure insanity.
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Married with two kids. My eldest started school today.

Today, I had to try and convince my 3 year old not to stick his fingers in his mouth after getting crap on them. Hes potty training and tried to wipe his own bum. A few months ago, he got bored while he was sitting on the potty and stuck a random bead up his ass.

I have never been more frustrated or stressed than since Ive had kids. Or tired, or had less money to spend on random stuff.

Wouldnt give it up for the world though, the good times are freaking amazing.

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Meanwhile I've known plenty that had kids and are pregnant now, during this pandemic.

That's insane.

What is even more sad and kinda ****ed up is the people that arent having children are the responsible ones that problem should, and all the people breeding are religious and young people being irresponsible.

When you think about this, it actually makes sense that the country is so divided.

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F1areaGaman posted...

What is even more sad and kinda ****ed up is the people that arent having children are the responsible ones that problem should, and all the people breeding are religious and young people being irresponsible.

When you think about this, it actually makes sense that the country is so divided.

That's a good point

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Have a house, would get married if it were a fit, don't want kids.

Don't give a fuck what other people do or don't want to do.

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MabusIncarnate posted...

I married and bought a house but no kids, and don't want them

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Not happening for me.

I'm dying early and alone.

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BettyWhite posted...

Not happening for me.

I'm dying early and alone.

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The world is a fucked up/cruel place. That's a major reason. Cost of living is absurd. Education/college is highway robbery. America is corrupt to the core and more divided than ever. We have a pandemic still going on that people can't even come together on etc. Our healthcare system is hot trash

Yeah, kids are definitely not on the radar for me and I've only got a few more years to make a decision.

Don't majority of marriages fail in the US as well?

having kids (or even just A kid) seems like it would be a nightmare
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AzurexNightmare posted...

I've never understood this. To me it's like having some kind of parental part of your brain awaken to brainwash you into enjoying that for lack of a better word.

The reason I say that is because I know right now I don't want to play with some young kid. I'd rather do my hobbies by myself or with my girl.

But all of a sudden, once I have a kid, that changes and I prefer to play with the kid? Don't get me wrong, props to you for being a good dad, but fuck that...

Yeah I know it's different because it's not a random kid. It's your kid. But that's kinda the point I'm making. It's still a kid. I'd rather just do my own thing. Without all that investment. Having that kid take away all my favorite things to do in life just for their own existence.. I'm good.

Now being an uncle where I can take the kids for a ride and maybe have them for a weekend tops? I do not mind at all. I'd take joy in it because once they go back to their parents house, it's not my problem anymore.

Honestly as a parent I still hate most kids. I love my kids and they are wicked smart and both have great personalities but when I am forced to deal with other people's kids I just feel like their parents are already failing them.

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Revocation68 posted...

Don't majority of marriages fail in the US as well?

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/12/02/upshot/the-divorce-surge-is-over-but-the-myth-lives-on.html

About 70 percent of marriages that began in the 1990s reached their 15th anniversary (excluding those in which a spouse died), up from about 65 percent of those that began in the 1970s and 1980s. Those who married in the 2000s are so far divorcing at even lower rates. If current trends continue, nearly two-thirds of marriages will never involve a divorce, according to data from Justin Wolfers, a University of Michigan economist (who also contributes to The Upshot).

There are many reasons for the drop in divorce, including later marriages, birth control and the rise of so-called love marriages. These same forces have helped reduce the divorce rate in parts of Europe, too. Much of the trend has to do with changing gender roles whom the feminist revolution helped and whom it left behind.

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I'm too selfish to be a good parent.

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I have a list of reasons but to keep it simple. Im not a selfish person but this is the one thing I choose to be selfish on. I dont want to live me life for someone else. If i wanna play video games ill play video games if i wanna get shitfaced imma get shitfaced I dont want to have to take other people into consideration every time. Once in a blue moon is fine like I didnt drink when i wanted to last week cause I didnt wanna be hungover driving my mom to her surgery appointment. But on a daily basis? Nah im gonna do what I want

Pets is more my speed they dont give a shit im drunk. Might pester me for attention while im gaming but giving it to them for just a few minutes here and there is usually enough for them

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Darmik posted...

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/12/02/upshot/the-divorce-surge-is-over-but-the-myth-lives-on.html

That's great and all but is the rate of marriage going down, up, or staying about the same over the years?

Plus this also doesn't account for people who stay married but are absolutely miserable in their relationship. I know a lot of couples who just stay together to stay together but are not happy/dying to cheat, want something new etc.

Revocation68 posted...

That's great and all but is the rate of marriage going down, up, or staying about the same over the years?

Does that matter? Pretty sure less people get married at younger ages due to cultural changes. Which is a good thing.

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Darmik posted...

Does that matter? Pretty sure less people get married at younger ages due to cultural changes. Which is a good thing.

Well more people getting married and staying married etc speaks for results/stats. Builds confidence for people to do it etc.

It speaks volumes to say something like "divorce is going down, but marriage has also gone down 30 to 40% etc". Then like I said, there are plenty of miserable couples

Revocation68 posted...

Well more people getting married and staying married etc speaks for results/stats. Builds confidence for people to do it etc.

It speaks volumes to say something like "divorce is going down, but marriage has also gone down 30 to 40% etc". Then like I said, there are plenty of miserable couples

People aren't getting married because they read some stats in an article. The point is that people get married later now and as a result more marriages are successful. So no most marriages don't end in divorce. That's a dated statistic that is also inflated from people who get married several times.

Basically as long you're not a Boomer you're more likely to be in a successful marriage.

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Revocation68 posted...

The world is a fucked up/cruel place. That's a major reason. Cost of living is absurd. Education/college is highway robbery. America is corrupt to the core and more divided than ever. We have a pandemic still going on that people can't even come together on etc. Our healthcare system is hot trash

Yeah, kids are definitely not on the radar for me and I've only got a few more years to make a decision.

Don't majority of marriages fail in the US as well?

Truth. Why bring another soul into this world to most likely suffer? Also, our countries don't care about and support us nearly as much as they should and mainly just want us to contribute to the government and economy and help keep it running mainly for the profit of the rich and powerful. I'm not really keen on having kids just to have them eventually be exploited and go through some of the shit I've been through, or possibly even worse things, judging the direction the economy and world are headed. My longtime girlfriend and I are going to be at odds soon because she wants to get married and have kids, because her "biological clock is ticking" and mainly because "she doesn't want her family's name to die with her" considering she was a only child, but IMO that's a selfish and shitty excuse to want to anything considering she isn't even 100% confident about it. It's not even like her parents are pressuring her either to my knowledge. I'm not against getting married to her eventually, but I am against making kids, especially if it is with someone who isn't sure they even really want to.

F1areaGaman posted...

What is even more sad and kinda ****ed up is the people that arent having children are the responsible ones that problem should, and all the people breeding are religious and young people being irresponsible.

When you think about this, it actually makes sense that the country is so divided.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sP2tUW0HDHA

got married and bought a house. neither one of us want kids.

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Bought a house but my girlfriend and I don't see any reason to get married. We work with kids all day, which means we don't really feel the need to have our own.

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Kids are awesome. Theyre like tiny little best friends you create and mold to your liking.

CapnMuffin posted...

Kids are awesome. Theyre like tiny little best friends you create and mold to your liking.

I dont have kids but i can tell you thats a very untrue statement. Kids often turn out anything but how their parents want them to be. As much as ive always hated the "it takes a village to raise a kid" saying ive seen its actually true. Everybody your kid deals with on a regular basis helps mold who they are for better or worse.

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mooreandrew58 posted...

I dont have kids

Ahh. No wonder you have no idea what you are talking about

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Have been married for 14 years. Wife and I have no interest in kids. Would rather spend our free time/money traveling.

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Nothing wrong with not wanting kids but people who hate them are maladjusted and disturbing.

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KID VID posted...

love makes you do some dumb stuff, man.

That's why i will never fall in love ever. I locked my heart, throw the key into the sun i push away everyone who tried to approach me until nobody even try anymore. Feels good man.

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I would like to have kids some day

At 26 I feel like Im too young for that, my mom and dad also started wayy too young lol

But I mean.. someone passed on life to me yknow? Id like to do the same for someone else whether thats adopted or whatever with my future wife

I feel like if I could do anything to show someone how much I love them I would - hence marriage. Im not too into the half and half thing of today - I think those moments of first meeting up with someone you like or getting closer until you admit you love are fantastic

I guess you get infatuated with someone so much and you love those type of moments so much too that you simply feel raising a family would be fun with them


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CapnMuffin posted...

Kids are awesome. Theyre like tiny little best friends you create and mold to your liking.

So far this has been true for me. I have 3 kids and they basically want to be just like you. I guess when they turn into teenagers it changes.

Regarding the TCs observation in the topic title, it's nuts that something like 90% of the people here don't want them. Who do they think will take care of them when they are older? It won't be the Government.

BloodMoon7 posted...

You're assuming having children means they'll take care of you. They could just put you in a home. Or they could die tragically in their 20s. Or you could die tragically in your 50s. If you want to be taken care of, you should just plan ahead for that now and save money. Having children is no guarantee of it.

Dis

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Kakapo posted...

Married with two kids. My eldest started school today.

Today, I had to try and convince my 3 year old not to stick his fingers in his mouth after getting crap on them. Hes potty training and tried to wipe his own bum. A few months ago, he got bored while he was sitting on the potty and stuck a random bead up his ass.

I have never been more frustrated or stressed than since Ive had kids. Or tired, or had less money to spend on random stuff.

Wouldnt give it up for the world though, the good times are freaking amazing.

It gets easier as they get older and they can do things on their own. Just last night my 11 year old helped my 9 year old with her clarinet practice.

Weve been lucky that my husbands career took off right after we got married and had kids so we actually have more money to spend on things than before. (It feels like not being married with kids had somehow been holding him back at the company because he got 2 promotions quickly after not having any for 10 years)
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apolloooo posted...

Dis

Raise 'em to think of their parents often

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Bleuets posted...

Most people here are insecure and girls dont like them so they claim they dont want a family.

This. Although most people here have attitudes of the type that youd ask them to do society a favor and don't procreate....so I'm seeing that as a win.

Because I'm still a kid even though I 25 year old
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im not 13 posted...

Ahh. No wonder you have no idea what you are talking about

Quote where i dk what im talking about or you have zero argument or are too scared to argue it Idk which.

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Conflict posted...

Except he isn't incorrect

If you think every kid wants to turn out like their parents I have bad news for you

No parent should want their kid to turn out like them anyway. I personally hope my kids turn out better than I did.

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kelemvor posted...

Regarding the TCs observation in the topic title, it's nuts that something like 90% of the people here don't want them. Who do they think will take care of them when they are older? It won't be the Government.

The same person that has taken care of me my entire life. Me.

When I can't do it any longer I'll just die.
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ghostblob posted...

Nothing wrong with not wanting kids but people who hate them are maladjusted and disturbing.

No you're maladjusted and disturbing.

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