Poll of the Day > Would it be weird as a 31 year old to ask a 22 year old coworker to hang out

(+) Yeah! (+)

We got this new girl at work. She likes a lot of the same things I do.

I am not attracted to her, so its nothing like that...but she seems like a cool person, and I'm always down for making new friends.

However, this could be weird because of a 9 year age gap. I'm just always looking for people to play Fake Plastic Instruments(guitar hero/rock band) with, and she is a fan.

Only weird if people make it weird.

Ask her to hang out. People don't always assume an invite to game night is a date. Although I would start with an activity that doesnt involve one of yalls homes for the first time though.

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It wouldn't even be weird if you asked her out.
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Youre both grown ups I dont think its weird

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No. Just hang out. Why would it be weird?
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That sounds like a terrible idea. Not because of the age, but because she's a new coworker. Once you've known each other a while to the point you aren't using "new" labels anymore, then it's probably whatever. But she could totally take it the wrong way. Sometimes people are also more friendly at work and don't necessarily want to hang out. If you have to ask others, it will probably be weird. But we aren't there to gauge it objectively. So who knows?

Another thing that could make it more awkward, and it's sort of a "real talk" question, is are you guys "in the same league" in terms of being attractive? If not, that's another layer with a different possible issue depending who is the hot and who is the not.

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Nah. I'm 30 I've made friends from work places who have been as young as 18 and as old as being in their 60's. Cross-generational friendships can be rewarding and insightful.

I personally don't think it would be weird but society can be weird sometimes so I felt like getting some perspective before I did anything. It seems like a good idea to at least wait until we've been working together more. It's only been two weeks.

I just like making new friends, especially ones who are down with weed and fake plastic instrument games.

I see nothing wrong with having friends that are younger then you or even dating said people providing it's legal. It's also common for adults to have friends that are younger than them too. I've became acquaintances with folk who are a lot younger then me and some that are older. My brothers ex housemate for example is around 10 years younger than me but we have a lot in common and he's a decent bloke so why not?

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I think it's weird on many levels. New coworker, age gap, gender diff.

The fact that she's a new co-worker makes it a little awkward, but that kind of an age gap with a female when it's supposedly just friends would make it weirder because nobody is going to believe a 31 y/o guy just wants to hang out with a 22 y/o chick. I'm reading it right now and even I don't believe it.

Otherwise anything with female co-workers these days is a bit fraught with danger, because you never know how anything is going to be taken. I'd say you'd probably want to work with her for a while before suggesting hanging out together outside of work.

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acesxhigh posted...

I think it's weird on many levels. New coworker, age gap, gender diff.

Why is any of that weird though?

Zeus posted...

The fact that she's a new co-worker makes a little awkward, but the age gap with a female when it's supposedly just friends would make it weirder because nobody is going to believe a 31 y/o guy just wants to hang out with a 22 y/o chick. I'm reading it right now and even I don't believe it.

Ah Zeus and folk like him with their minds in the gutter. Still even if they were at it it's still not weird. I'm still not getting why the age gap or gender of someone has any difference in it being "weird" or not.

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It's only weird if you make it weird

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acesxhigh posted...

New coworker

Zeus posted...

The fact that she's a new co-worker makes it a little awkward

Not really. I always try to make friends at my job. And usually do so, as well. It can help with getting into a new job. And making a friends is always good... Someone to just hang out with sometimes...
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LinkPizza posted...

Not really. I always try to make friends at my job. And usually do so, as well. It can help with getting into a new job. And making a friends is always good... Someone to just hang out with sometimes...

My last Job a acquaintance of mine had the hots for a regular worker. We were the new ones in that situation. He got talking to her and now they have two kids together.

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LinkPizza posted...

Not really. I always try to make friends at my job. And usually do so, as well. It can help with getting into a new job. And making a friends is always good... Someone to just hang out with sometimes...

There's nothing wrong with being friendly with co-workers, but there are boundaries, especially when you don't know somebody all that well yet.

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Zeus posted...

There's nothing wrong with being friendly with co-workers, but there are boundaries, especially when you don't know somebody all that well yet.

Sure if you keep asking her to hang out after she says no, but it's not really weird to hang with coworkers

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Invite other co workers too and get the whole band together. Drums bass guitar and vocals. That might make it a little less weird if you're having reservations.

Zeus posted...

There's nothing wrong with being friendly with co-workers, but there are boundaries, especially when you don't know somebody all that well yet.

... and the co worker can just so no.

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Zeus posted...

There's nothing wrong with being friendly with co-workers, but there are boundaries, especially when you don't know somebody all that well yet.

Yeah. But you can find out those boundaries and not cross them. Asking someone to hang out doesn't seem like crossing line. If they say no, then that's it. But nothing wrong with asking them to hang out. You can actually hang out to get to know someone.

hungrymike posted...

Invite other co workers too and get the whole band together. Drums bass guitar and vocals. That might make it a little less weird if you're having reservations.

This is also a good idea. We've done this at many jobs I've had...
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LinkPizza posted...

Yeah. But you can find out those boundaries and not cross them. Asking someone to hang out doesn't seem like crossing line. If they say no, then that's it. But nothing wrong with asking them to hang out. You can actually hang out to get to know someone.

This is also a good idea. We've done this at many jobs I've had...

Depends on how psycho the person is.
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hungrymike posted...

Invite other co workers too and get the whole band together. Drums bass guitar and vocals. That might make it a little less weird if you're having reservations.

Sounds a fairly sensible suggestion.

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