Current Events > My boss has an illegal coffee maker in his office

(+) Yeah! (+)

Upper management has decreed that coffee machines are vectors for COVID, so they're officially banned. Existing installs are blocked off with "out of order" signs. (So are the public water fountains and break room fridges with water dispensers, lul)

He brought it in the other day, uses it in the morning or whenever he needs a pick me up, then simply places a cardboard box over top of it to hide when not in use. It's the Solid Snake of Keurig machines

You gonna snitch?

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To be fair, if it's for his personal use only, being a Covid vector is moot.

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Turbam posted...

You gonna snitch?

Snitches get pink slips

The_Korey posted...

To be fair, if it's for his personal use only, being a Covid vector is moot.

I'm sure he'd be open to us using it, but I'm not a big coffee guy anymore

why does america play at covid suppression
you guys already failed and nothing short of a complete lockdown until you are back into single digits is going to help

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...do people lick the coffee machine or something?

i'd be more worried about the other people in the office giving me covid by coughing then i would about someone getting covid in my boiling water drink.

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The_Korey posted...

To be fair, if it's for his personal use only, being a Covid vector is moot.

Yeah it sounds like it's only for personal use. If everyone was coming into his office and using it, that would be different.

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It's not illegal since it's for his use only though

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monkmith posted...

...do people lick the coffee machine or something?

i'd be more worried about the other people in the office giving me covid by coughing then i would about someone getting covid in my boiling water drink.

Iunno. I refill my tumbler of water multiple times a day by just lifting up the "out of order" sign on the fridge. I'd be very concerned if someone was licking that

unknownhombre posted...

If everyone was coming into his office and using it, that would be differe

We're a small department that's locked off from most of the rest of the building, at worst itd be 7 people total that already work in relatively close quarters

monkmith posted...

...do people lick the coffee machine or something?

i'd be more worried about the other people in the office giving me covid by coughing then i would about someone getting covid in my boiling water drink.

Even setting aside spread through surface contact, I bet the coffee one is to stop people from wanting to congregate

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Are coffee machines vectors for Covid19 anyways?

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treewojima posted...

Iunno. I refill my tumbler of water multiple times a day by just lifting up the "out of order" sign on the fridge. I'd be very concerned if someone was licking that

The problem is that everyone puts their mouths on their water bottles/coffee cups that are likely to come in contact with the water dispenser, coffee maker, etc. Its pretty straightforward.

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Balrog0 posted...

Even setting aside spread through surface contact, I bet the coffee one is to stop people from wanting to congregate

if you're worried about surface spread, there are far worse areas in an office for that. doorknobs and stair rails come to mind.

you're right about a congregation point though, didn't think of that one.

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An illegal coffee maker!? :O

FursonaNonGrata posted...

The problem is that everyone puts their mouths on their water bottles/coffee cups that are likely to come in contact with the water dispenser, coffee maker, etc. Its pretty straightforward.

the likelihood of getting covid by ingesting a tiny amount of it is very low. the real issue would be that there's someone in your office who's actively infectious and sharing air space with you.

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monkmith posted...

the likelihood of getting covid by ingesting a tiny amount of it is very low. the real issue would be that there's someone in your office who's actively infectious and sharing air space with you.

Sure, sharing air space or a coffee maker or water dispenser. Whats the point in trying to downplay the likelihood of spreading Covid through shared surfaces?


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FursonaNonGrata posted...

Sure, sharing air space or a coffee maker or water dispenser. Whats the point in trying to downplay the likelihood of spreading Covid through shared surfaces?

the fact that its considerably less likely? its not downplaying to point out facts. there's a reason people aren't being told to wipe down everything you buy anymore.

the point is that if you're worried about getting covid from touching the start button on the office coffee machine, maybe you should be asking why someone with covid is sharing office space with you...

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yteah, they tried pulling rthis shit on me in my office, but i still use the fridge, coffee maker and microwave. if they are forcing me in to work when i can work from home, i am not going without my comforts to get through the day

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I don't think anyone follows it but I know my gfs office does have protocols for cleaning surfaces regularly.


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He forwarded us an email from upper management today as well, reiterating mask rules and stating that "All coffee and filtered water stations must remain closed. No shared coffee machines, Keurig machines or individual coffee machines permitted."

https://youtu.be/L397TWLwrUU

MrFingers07 posted...

Are coffee machines vectors for Covid19 anyways?

public use ones, maybe.

his own personal kurig shouldnt be an issue

Is this a skit for Conan?

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coffee harbors covid now?

you realize how hot coffee is?
viruses (particularly covid) dont live for very long in high temperatures....

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Just start peppering your conversations with him with mgs references and quotes. See if he catches on.


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wouldn't the smell give him away?

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if he's the only one using it then who cares

get your own

hell better yet, ask why the fuck you have to be in the office at all

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AlmightyCheeks posted...

Is this a skit for Conan?

I think it was.

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I assure you that it's very, very real. Given that we work in a warehouse there are lots of boxes on shelves and desks, so it blends in