Current Events > Woman arrested for squirting vaginal fluids at police officers in self-defense

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YoshitoKikuchi
12/23/19 11:56:22 PM
#1:


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SSJKirby
12/23/19 11:57:13 PM
#2:


Leslie Knope why

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XxKrazyChaosxX
12/23/19 11:57:55 PM
#3:


She looks pretty satisfied.

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SoundNetwork
12/23/19 11:58:27 PM
#4:


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YoshitoKikuchi
12/23/19 11:59:40 PM
#5:


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#6
Post #6 was unavailable or deleted.
inloveanddeath0
12/24/19 12:01:51 AM
#7:


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BuckVanHammer
12/24/19 12:03:31 AM
#8:


thats pretty amazing. should get some kind of trophy or award. she blinded them with it...

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#9
Post #9 was unavailable or deleted.
YoshitoKikuchi
12/24/19 12:15:48 AM
#10:


BuckVanHammer posted...
thats pretty amazing. should get some kind of trophy or award. she blinded them with it...

Heh

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SauI_Goodman
12/24/19 12:17:21 AM
#11:


I thought Miami strippers would look better than that. Eh.
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Jiek_Fafn
12/24/19 12:18:49 AM
#12:


Officer Miguel Aguera of the Miami Police Department told reporters that all five of the officers had since tested positive for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes after being exposed to the vaginal fluids.

Fuck

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SauI_Goodman
12/24/19 12:20:19 AM
#13:


lol sounds like there's some extracurricular activities going on at that club. Might warrant an investigation?
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Axiom
12/24/19 12:21:32 AM
#14:


There are way too many people that read this and still thought it was real
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SoundNetwork
12/24/19 12:23:05 AM
#15:


Axiom posted...
There are way too many people that read this and still thought it was real
It's a pretty realistic story in this timeline

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SauI_Goodman
12/24/19 12:23:11 AM
#16:


Eh, in this world I can't be too sure these days. Given some of the stories that are real.
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dj1200
12/24/19 12:23:19 AM
#17:


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Krow_Incarnate
12/24/19 12:26:26 AM
#18:


Jiek_Fafn posted...
Officer Miguel Aguera of the Miami Police Department told reporters that all five of the officers had since tested positive for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes after being exposed to the vaginal fluids.

Fuck
Oh, jeezus fucking christ

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SuperShake666
12/24/19 12:28:29 AM
#19:


Jiek_Fafn posted...
Officer Miguel Aguera of the Miami Police Department told reporters that all five of the officers had since tested positive for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes after being exposed to the vaginal fluids.

Fuck

Story is no longer fun.

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Axiom
12/24/19 12:29:36 AM
#20:


SoundNetwork posted...
It's a pretty realistic story in this timeline
No it's really not
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davidg4l
12/24/19 12:29:43 AM
#21:


Witness the birth of a new superhero, the Skunkwoman.

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TheMikh
12/24/19 12:32:41 AM
#22:


YoshitoKikuchi posted...
worldnewsdailyreport

satire

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Lordgold666
12/24/19 12:34:36 AM
#23:


Lol

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Lordgold666
12/24/19 12:35:41 AM
#24:


Just actually clicked the link, dear god, that face

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"May the Father of Understanding guide us"
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inloveanddeath0
12/24/19 12:46:31 AM
#26:


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JimCarrysToe
12/24/19 2:23:34 AM
#27:


@inloveanddeath0
@JimCarrysToe
Why did you tag me twice in this? You tryin to say something? You think I'd do something like that? You little shit, I'd squirt ketchup at them through my nose! You're disgusting!

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''Three years of math trying to flat earth logic my way out of having a micro penis....'' -CanuckCowboy
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YugiNoob
12/24/19 2:27:54 AM
#28:


In a 2013 court case, another Miami citizen was convicted of armed robbery after threatening a convenient store clerk with his erect and AIDS-infected penis and was sentenced to 237 years in jail.

lol

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evil_zombie11
12/24/19 2:39:52 AM
#29:


Jiek_Fafn posted...
Officer Miguel Aguera of the Miami Police Department told reporters that all five of the officers had since tested positive for chlamydia, gonorrhea, and herpes after being exposed to the vaginal fluids.

Fuck

GODAMN

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Yo wtf
Probably lifting or running...
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malenz
12/24/19 2:51:13 AM
#30:


Axiom posted...
There are way too many people that read this and still thought it was real
I was gonna say how in the fuck is that even possible
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bknight
12/24/19 3:31:27 AM
#32:


But, it's just pee.
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spikethedevil
12/24/19 3:33:52 AM
#33:


bknight posted...
But, it's just pee.

Pee would be even worse.

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LinkFanatic
12/24/19 4:21:59 AM
#34:


LOL

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inloveanddeath0
12/24/19 10:00:32 AM
#35:


JimCarrysToe posted...
@inloveanddeath0
Why did you tag me twice in this? You tryin to say something? You think I'd do something like that? You little shit, I'd squirt ketchup at them through my nose! You're disgusting!
It didn't show up the first time so I thought you got modded

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JimCarrysToe
12/24/19 3:09:04 PM
#36:


inloveanddeath0 posted...
It didn't show up the first time so I thought you got modded
*sneezes ketchup on you* BULLSHIT!

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''Goddamnit stop being angry at towels.'' -me
''Three years of math trying to flat earth logic my way out of having a micro penis....'' -CanuckCowboy
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Shablagoo
12/24/19 3:10:23 PM
#37:


SSJKirby posted...
Leslie Knope why

Its Leslie Knope doing a goofy Tom Haverford grin lol

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brotrrwinner
12/26/19 6:27:22 AM
#39:


Randy Pitchford is now tracking this topic

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September 21st, 2008
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Akagami_Shanks
12/26/19 6:30:52 AM
#40:


just goes to show how easily fake news spreads in this day and age lol

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#41
Post #41 was unavailable or deleted.
Foppe
12/26/19 6:35:54 AM
#42:


According to current Florida laws and if convicted of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon against five police officers, Simmons could face up to 1,036 years in jail believe legal experts.
In a 2013 court case, another Miami citizen was convicted of armed robbery after threatening a convenient store clerk with his erect and AIDS-infected penis and was sentenced to 237 years in jail.

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