Poll of the Day > It's been nearly a year since my wife left me.

(+) Yeah! (+)

Of course at the time I went kind of psycho for a month or two trying to get her back. I didnt do anything too crazy (Nothing illegal or abusive, no cheating). When she left me I tried bringing her flowers and such but that only pushed her away.

Anyways, shes pregnant now and the baby is due in October. Its not mine. Its a tinder baby. She met the guy in December 2017 and figured out she was pregnant in late January 2018. In February 2018, she told me her pregnancy news (we were still legally married, just living separately) and I thought she was warming up to getting back together with me. And before you say it, yes I know I could have possibly been raising another mans child, but thankfully we ended up finalizing our divorce in June. The tinder father wants nothing to do with her or the child btw.

What really bothers me is that I cant seem to attract any other females. Tinder for myself is terrible. Im a black man so my success rate is already skewed. I met one chick through tinder and we hooked up and such but she was really like the only match I ever even got. She wasnt long term material though so shes already out the picture.

Im about to go to work. Hopefully today is the day I can reel in someone.
---

Kazuma_Yagami posted...

What really bothers me is that I cant seem to attract any other females. Tinder for myself is terrible. Im a black man so my success rate is already skewed. I met one chick through tinder and we hooked up and such but she was really like the only match I ever even got.

Still a better success rate then I get on that shit. Honestly it's much more easy for girls when it comes to dating, even more so on Tinder. I'd suggest other methods but I'm shit out of luck myself so can't give any more advice other than the generic stuff such as go to bars/clubs, work out yadda yadda. One things for sure though you're better off without your ex wife whatever the case.
---

Im 22 btw. Was 20 when I got married. Ive been working out consistently for months. People Im closer to definitely have pointed out my growth which is good but I still have a ways to go and whatever growth I have had is obviously not good enough.

My main issue is that I cant swem to eat enough. Its not that Im not hungry, its just living with my parents now makes getting the food I need harder.
---

damn, did she ever say why she left you?

Kazuma_Yagami posted...

My main issue is that I cant swem to eat enough. Its not that Im not hungry, its just living with my parents now makes getting the food I need harder.

Same way here, man. Also realize that growth is a very slow process unless you're one of those body builder types who eat 6 kinds of meals ever and work out for 2 and a half hours 5 daya a week. If you're going just for weight gain, it's gonna take a long while. Something you can do for better muscle definition is lower weight, higher reps. And who cares if you cap out at 105 on bench for a day? Doing 15 reps 5 times in a set will have your muscles screaming but it will help make you more toned.

Overall man, it sounds like you got a positive outlook on progress but don't forget that it's not exponential. You'll hit walls and sometimes even slip back, but just keep pushing at it and try something different from time to time.

She said a lot of stuff, but ultimately it boiled down to my lack of confidence and how I always argued about money. The confidence piece is legit and I have learned better since, but its not like my confidence was absolutely terrible at the time. If my confidence was really that bad we would never be together in the first place, let alone me being with any woman. It was definitely not something worth just up and leaving someone for. The money thing is really a fault in her because we were just barely scraping by and I was being more critical about our purchases for a time. I probably could have been nicer, but I dont regret his critical I was.

And yeah as far working out Im in a little plateau. My body isnt changing drastically recently but Im lifting more and more weight. I just need to get the eating right and Im sure results will come sooner. Im not stressing too much about that though Im glad I have a good routine going. As long as I keep it up Ill be fine.
---

GanglyKhan posted...

Kazuma_Yagami posted...

My main issue is that I cant swem to eat enough. Its not that Im not hungry, its just living with my parents now makes getting the food I need harder.

Same way here, man. Also realize that growth is a very slow process unless you're one of those body builder types who eat 6 kinds of meals ever and work out for 2 and a half hours 5 daya a week. If you're going just for weight gain, it's gonna take a long while. Something you can do for better muscle definition is lower weight, higher reps. And who cares if you cap out at 105 on bench for a day? Doing 15 reps 5 times in a set will have your muscles screaming but it will help make you more toned.

Overall man, it sounds like you got a positive outlook on progress but don't forget that it's not exponential. You'll hit walls and sometimes even slip back, but just keep pushing at it and try something different from time to time.

Thats not very good fitness advice
---

Honestly I've met more girls on Facebook just sending messages or replying to comments.

PoF is trash for me, and I've mostly used Windows Phones, so not many apps.

That's rough about your ex, but man, if I were you, that Tinder pump and dump she had (plus a baby to boot) would make me feel so much better about the situation. "What did you leeaarrrrn?"
---

If she was around the same age as you when you got married, I'd bet that the real reason you got divorced was because you were both too young to be married.

I got married when I was 19 but I now fully comprehend how stupid and insane and unlikely to succeed getting married that young is.

I wouldn't worry too much about finding another long term thing or being a beefcake yet. You're SO YOUNG. You probably won't even recognize your taste in women a few years from now. It really is true that these things like to happen when you're not trying.
---

I wouldn't worry about it. There are many other ways to enjoy your free time. No, not that you pervs.

Oh....
---

Kazuma_Yagami posted...

tinder baby

Lol poor thing...
---

So less than 6 months after leaving you and while still married she got herself knocked up by some random guy from Tinder? Sounds like you got lucky losing that "winner".


---

Cacciato posted...

Thats not very good fitness advice

That's not very good feedback. I'm genuinely non-offended about your post and I'm not taking it personally. As a word of (hopefully good) advice, if you're going to saying something was XYZ, it helps to give reasons why.

1.) So you can improve
2.) So TC can improve
3.) So I can improve

Tinder baby.

To live in a time where that's now a thing.
---

Cacciato posted...

GanglyKhan posted...

Kazuma_Yagami posted...

My main issue is that I cant swem to eat enough. Its not that Im not hungry, its just living with my parents now makes getting the food I need harder.

Same way here, man. Also realize that growth is a very slow process unless you're one of those body builder types who eat 6 kinds of meals ever and work out for 2 and a half hours 5 daya a week. If you're going just for weight gain, it's gonna take a long while. Something you can do for better muscle definition is lower weight, higher reps. And who cares if you cap out at 105 on bench for a day? Doing 15 reps 5 times in a set will have your muscles screaming but it will help make you more toned.

Overall man, it sounds like you got a positive outlook on progress but don't forget that it's not exponential. You'll hit walls and sometimes even slip back, but just keep pushing at it and try something different from time to time.

Thats not very good fitness advice

I think it's a Zeus alt, ok?
---

GanglyKhan posted...

Cacciato posted...

Thats not very good fitness advice

That's not very good feedback. I'm genuinely non-offended about your post and I'm not taking it personally. As a word of (hopefully good) advice, if you're going to saying something was XYZ, it helps to give reasons why.

1.) So you can improve
2.) So TC can improve
3.) So I can improve

I was going to say "Says 'That's wrong.' Doesn't explain why."
---

Your first mistake was trusting a woman.
---